Iowa Caucus Wrap-Up

So, after a day of caucusing-a-go-go in Iowa yesterday, the Democratic side is still too close to call. Either Hillary Clinton or Bernie Sanders will win by the thinnest of margins.

In some places, ties were decided by coin toss, and Clinton reportedly won all five (or six, depending on the source) flips of the coin.

Lots of people are losing their shit that democracy could be decided with the flip of a coin, but the whole caucus format is absurd, with people shouting at each other and trying to convince people to literally move from one side of a room to another, and a breaking a tie with a coin toss might be the least absurd part of it.

I note there are a lot of people who are outraged about settling a tie with a coin toss, but cool with frontloading the primary schedule with disproportionately white states. Ahem.

[ETA. Here's some additional information about those coin tosses, and how they didn't actually matter as much as originally reported.]

After failing to register entirely with caucus-goers, Martin O'Malley has suspended his campaign. Goodbye, East Coast Gavin Newsom!

But all left-leaning people were winners last night, because none of our candidates were Donald Trump!

On the other side of the aisle...

image of Ted Cruz's face on a US flag background, with a banner over his head reading '#1 Worst!'

Ted Cruz pulled out a win over Donald Trump, with Marco Rubio having a surprisingly good showing in third place. Mike Huckabee tanked so hard he suspended his campaign. Seeya, shitlord!

After being declared the winner, Cruz gave what is the worst victory speech I believe I've ever heard. He sounded less like a president and more like the principal of a conservative evangelical elementary school, telling the kids about the big field trip to the dump.

Next stop: New Hampshire! One week from today.

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