We started out the Republican primary with seventeen candidates. Sevenfuckingteen. Slowly, the clowncarishly enormous field was whittled down to the three dirtbags left standing: Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, and John Kasich.
Trump, who is simply too forthright in communicating the grotesquery of Republican policies for the delicate constitutions of Republican elites, is winning by a country mile, to the consternation of buttoned-up conservatives like Mitt Romney, who prefer their platform of rank bigotry to be conveyed via dogwhistles and Orwellian newspeak.
And so this ridiculous primary continues to be ever more absurd, with not-so-secret discussions taking place among GOP leaders and donors about the possibility of a brokered convention, in which even Trump doesn't win enough delegates to win straight-out, and how they might exploit a contested convention in order to slide in some goofball who hasn't even been running as the party's nominee.
The latest: "Charles Koch Is Privately Committed to Getting Paul Ryan Nominated in Cleveland."
Of course. Which Koch denies. Because this is an obvious trial balloon, responding to Ryan's insistence that he would never even consider it unless the party united behind the idea. Is everyone uniting?! Are they uniting yet?!
They are not uniting. Trump's supporters are never going to unite behind anyone who they view as "stealing" the nomination from him.
It's neat how Republican voters suddenly care about voter disenfranchisement when its their votes the Republican Party is treating like dogshit.
Good luck with your nomination, Republicans. Have fun with your roosting chickens! Whichever appalling nightmare you decide to run, I will dedicate the next half year of my life to defeating them!