This thought's been percolating through my brainmeatz for a while now, and I think it's reached a point I want to put it out there. I've been thinking a lot about defensiveness: why I feel defensive, when do I feel defensive, what am I defending, all of that.
And the single thread that's coming to me through all the times I can recall where I've felt defensive is this one: it was about defending my privilege.
Every. Single. Time!*
So a short post (a bit of a shocker from me, no?): if you find you're feeling defensive, and the person who's "making" you feel that way is someone over whom you could be defined as having some privilege, there's a very good chance you are** defending that privilege. That makes it the very best time to stop, put down the shovel, and examine what you're putting out, and what you're taking in from that person.
Defensiveness: a signpost of privilege.
* See, Sady does influence my writing!
** For this, read "You are almost certainly..."