Oh Manchester, So Much to Answer For

Oh Manchester:

Organizers of a major erotic festival are closing for business in Manchester due to a lack of interest, which they blame on recalcitrant northern English men.

Erotica Manchester opened on Friday, selling a range of sex aids, clothing and footwear, but ticket sales have been poor and organizers say they will not be coming back.

"We've tried to warm this city up for more than two years but northerners just haven't responded in sufficient numbers," said event director Savvas Christodoulou.

"They are happy enough to come to our London event in the autumn but they seem embarrassed about being seen at Erotica Manchester."

Organizers said their research shows northern women wanted to attend the three-day adult show but were "under the thumb of their other halves."

"We thought Manchester was an open minded city but maybe we were wrong," a spokesman for the event told Reuters. "People flock to our show in London but it seems that up here, the traditional northern male still calls the shots."

Maybe it’s because belligerent ghouls run Manchester schools. In any case, I’m sure it’s somehow Morrissey’s doing. Because the world revolves around Mozz.

Hello, darling. My, what a big gun you have.

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