Unsolicited Advice from Auntie Liss

Facebook CEO and antidemocratic supervillain Mark Zuckerberg announced today at an annual deverloper conference in San Jose that Facebook is launching a new dating app to rival apps like Tinder, which he hopes will be used to forge "real long-term relationships — not just hookups." He reassured the dubious crowd: "We've designed this with privacy and safety in mind from the beginning."


I am not generally in the business of offering unsolicited advice, but: DO NOT USE FACEBOOK'S DATING APP.

There is zero reason to trust Facebook, and every reason not to trust Facebook. With your data. With your privacy. With your safety.

They have never cared about protecting any of those things; they have only cared about them insofar as they could exploit them — and you — for profit.

The mere fact that Zuckerberg thinks it's reasonable, that it's not utterly ghastly, to be introducing a dating service in the middle of a wave of criticism over the rank violation of millions of people's privacy, is evidence that this company cannot be trusted to do the right thing. Ever.

Do what you want to do, but my advice is to avoid this shit at all costs. Meet a nice person the old-fashioned way like your Auntie Liss: By talking to weirdos 4,000 miles away who will run in front of a shitty webcam broadcasting from the construction site of the Scottish Parliament Building to prove they're who they say they are.

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