BREAKING: PROBABLY SOMETHING

[Some period of time ago], Donald Trump and/or [member of his administration] claimed [X] regarding [corruption being investigated]. Today it was reported by [name(s)] at [publication] that anonymous sources have disclosed that Trump and/or [member of his administration] were lying like the shitlord(s) he is/they are.

The White House immediately put out a statement denying the report. Tomorrow morning, Trump will tweet some radioactive trash to undermine the statement.

The United States remains perilously balanced on a precipice of calamitous doom.

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