Don't Mess with Hippos

[Content Note: Animal aggression.]

Via my friend Jordan, here is an amazing video of boaters on a lake in Africa narrowly avoiding getting hit by a large, aggressive hippo:


Video Description: The boaters are moving quickly away from a hippo in the water, trying to avoid it. The hippo moves through the water toward them incredibly quickly, then, as the video slows to slow-motion, the hippo's head bursts through the water very near the boat, and makes a huge splash as the boat continues to speed away.

The safari operator says: "We want to assure you that we were doing our utmost to avoid this animal and as you can see from the film it started well away from the boat. We hope that it perhaps goes some way to dispelling the perception that hippos are large lethargic herbivores...they are truly dangerous and as you will see in this film deadly fast through the water."

I told Jordan: "This video is why I am just fucking flattered when fat-hating trolls call me a hippo. HAVE YOU SEEN WHAT HIPPOS CAN DO?!"

I mean, seriously. If you're trying to insult me, you're gonna have to do better than comparing me to one of the most awesome, fearsome animals on the planet.

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