Downton Abbey Open Thread

image of Lord Grantham (Hugh Bonneville) looking stuffy and inept in his stupid suit

[Spoilers are telling secrets downstairs herein. And there's a big spoiler this week, so proceed with caution!]

Welp, you really whoopsed it up this time, Lord Whoops! Even Lady Valium is taking rage pills with an I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOUR STUPID FACE chaser.

Here is what happens when you are a privileged, classist wanker who sanctimoniously insists that your fancy-pants city doctor must know more about everything than the humble village doctor who's been treating your children their whole lives: Your daughter dies. RIP Sybil.

Even though I know that women die in childbirth, and this is basically just a soap opera that will always mistreat its characters to Make Points, I was still angry at the show for killing Sybil primarily to underscore Lord Whoops' already-evident character flaws and create more dramatic conflict. In fact, I was so angry that I wasn't even particularly moved by her death—until they cut to Thomas crying.

That really got me—Thomas telling Mrs. Hughes that Sybil was one of the few people who had ever treated him with kindness. The heartstrings! They were officially tugged.

In other news, Anna met with Bates and they figured out how to prove he is innocent of killing his ex-wife. Something something gaolmumble between a guard and inmate, who are going to thwart the plan, for reasons I have yet to discern. I guess life gets pretty boring at Gray Gaol, and you might as well screw up someone's life to keep yourself entertained!

Ethyl went to work for Mrs. Crowley and burned the fuck outta an organ meat soufflĂ©. "Sorry, Mrs. Crowley! I was trained at the Whoops Institute of Culinary Arts at Whoopston Abbey!"—Ethyl.

Matthew met with an attorney about how Lord Whoops is garbage at running the estate. Mary got mad at him, because she has to take up the ass-covering slack for her dad when the Dowager Countess isn't around. Ladies, I must respectfully disagree with you. It is his fault. He is a mismanager of epic proportions, and he needs to go to bed.

And keep him the hell away from Edith before he crushes what little bit of self-esteem she manages to retain under the weight of his haughty contempt!

Ugh this guy.

In one bright spot of good news: Matthew's dick still works!


[Please proceed to talk about all things Downton Abbey, but only through the fourth episode of Season 3. Please don't share things from later in the season, even with a spoiler warning, because I've got to mod the thread, which requires reading everything. So be kind, if you're elsewhere in the world where the whole season has already aired.]

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