[Content Note: Harassment; misogyny.]
I hate our mail carrier SO MUCH.
I don't genuinely hate people very often, but I hate this guy.
He smokes cigars in the mail truck, so all of our mail smells like cigar smoke. Now, I don't much care if my bills and catalogs smell like cigar smoke, but if I order a gift for someone or a piece of clothing for myself or Iain, I don't love having to air it out to get rid of stink when it's brand new.
Which would be bad enough.
But he also screams at me if I don't empty the mailbox for a day or two. I have explained to him, several times, that I have a disability that can make even walking to the mailbox difficult. He responds, at best, by sneering at me. Once, as he was putting mail in the box, because it wasn't even full so who fucking cares, he started screaming at the end of my driveway about what a fat bitch I am.
Which would also be bad enough.
But he also loathes and fears dogs. That is not unusual, but he has now been to our door bringing packages like ten thousand times over the last few years, and he knows they are friendly dogs. They don't jump on him or bark or do anything but sniff at him curiously, no less menace him. They're just there.
Still, okay, I get it, if it's a phobia, it doesn't matter if my dogs are nice.
So, despite the fact that he has never once said to me, "Hey, you know, I'm not a fan of dogs, so can you make sure your dogs are away before you open the door?" but has instead snarled, "Keep your fucking dogs away from me," I have tried to accommodate him.
The way our house is laid out, there's nowhere to quickly put the dogs away, so I call them to the kitchen for a treat. That takes about 30 seconds. If I take that 30 seconds, he LEAVES, even though I say I'll be just a minute.
And if I don't take the time to put them in the kitchen, they come to the door with me, and he screams at them and at me. He has literally screamed at me while I'm standing there apologizing for my perfectly behaved dogs.
Which is what just happened not a half hour ago, when he came to the front door. I went to the door after he knocked, and I told the dogs, "Back. Wait." and held up my hands. We are literally on the other side of the door at this point. He can see me through the window. He can see me trying to get the dogs to wait so they don't get near him. AND HE RINGS THE FUCKING DOORBELL AND POUNDS ON THE DOOR.
So the dogs run to the door. And I say, "Back. Wait." Loud enough for him to hear. "Just a second!" AND HE POUNDS ON THE FUCKING DOOR AGAIN.
I open the door then, because he clearly wants me just to open the door. And Zelda steps out on the porch beside him. Not hyper. Not touching him. Just next to him. And he yells at me, "GET IT AWAY!"
It took every ounce of my willpower not to scream at him. I just took the package, said to Zelda, "Come here, good girl," and then closed the door behind her and he glowered at me.
Every time he comes to the door, this happens. And every time he comes to the door, I get more anxious.
Because no matter what, he always seems to find some reason to bully me. Funny, that.
Recently, when the dogs peered out to greet the weekend mail carrier, I began my usual, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry," as she bent down to snorgle them. She told me not to apologize. "They're so lovely!" she said, burying her face in Zelda's coat.
"Ah, it's just a reflex," I said. "Our weekday carrier yells at me about them all the time."
She narrowed her eyes. "He is one mean dude," she said. "Really scary. I'm sorry you have to deal with him."
So his coworkers know what he's like, and they're scared of him. Presumably, his bosses then also know what he's like, and they're probably scared of him, too. Which makes me pretty reluctant to report him.
Since, ya know, he knows where I live.
[Note: I am not soliciting advice. I know what my options are, and I'm weighing them.]