Daily Dose of Cute

Have I ever mentioned three thousand times that Dudley is very lazy? Dudley is very lazy.

[Dudley lies on the loveseat looking sleepy; I'm standing at the front door, pointing the camera at him.] Dudley, you wanna go out for a walk? Let's go for a walk. Dudley! [I dangle the leash temptingly.] Come on, Dudz. *kissy noises* [Pause; Dudley doesn't budge.] Dudley, are you the laziest dog? Come on, lazybones. [I swivel the camera down, where Zelda is running around my feet in circles, excitedly wagging her tail.] Do you want to go for a walk? [Zelda sits and looks up at me, wagging her tail.] You do?! You wanna go out for a walk? Yes, what a good girl! [I swivel the camera back to Dudley, still lying in the same position.] Dudley, come on, we're waiting for you. [Pause; Dudley doesn't budge.] Dudz, c'mere! *kissy noises* Come on, Dudz! *snapping and whistling* "Let's go! *tongue clicking* [I swivel the camera down to see Olivia now also standing by the front door.] Livsy wants to go for a walk! [I pan to Zelda, now running around with waggy tail again.] Zelda sure wants to go for a walk. [Back to Dudley.] Come on, Dudz. Come on, Dudz! [I slap my knee with my hand.] Come on, good boy! [Back to Zelda, who sits and looks up at me eagerly.] Who's a good girl? Are you a good girl? Yes, you are. You're a good girl. [Back to Dudley.] Dudley!

All right, come on, Dudz! *snapping* Come on! *kissy noises* Oh my goodness. *sigh* [I walk around the back of the couch into the living room toward Dudley.] Come here, lazy boy. [I pet his head and scratch his chin.] Who's a good boy? Who's such a good boy? [Dudley enjoys the scratches, then lays his head back down.] You ready to go? [Zelda runs up, wagging her tail.] Tell him! Tell him, Zelda. [She jumps up on the couch next to Dudley and looks out the window.] See?! She's ready to go out! Come on, Dudz! Come on, Dudley! Let's go, Dudley! [Dudley yawns.] Dudley. [Extreme close-up; he sniffs at the camera; I whisper at him.] Let's go outside. Let's go for a walk. [Dudley yawns.]

[Zelda comes back over.] Tell him. Tell him, Zelda! Tell him it's time! [She sits, wags her tail, looks at Dudley.] It's time for a walk! It's time for a walk! [Pause; Dudley doesn't budge.] Come on, Dudz. *kissy noises* [I walk back to the front door.] Dudley, let's go. Let's go, Dudley. We're going out. [I open the door.] Come on, Dudley, we're gonna go without you. Come on! Come on, Dudz! *snapping* Come on, Dudley! [Dudley looks at me from the couch, yawns, and looks away.]
We did eventually get out for a walk.

Zelda and Dudley at the end of their leashes, standing in the grass and sniffing at something
"This smells so gross!"        "I know—it's awesome!"

And then they came back in and had a snarling row over a dog biscuit, because Zelda was being greedy—and Dudley is as slow to eat his biccies as he is to get off his ass for a walk, lol.


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