"If you volunteered more, you'd probably lose weight!"—Portly Dyke, being Very Helpful (jokingly so, of course) during our regularly scheduled Wednesday phone call, when we were talking about a project on which I was working for local animal rescue, and I said I can't seem to find enough hours in the day to give as much time as I'd like to volunteering.
This chirpy conveyance of Very Helpfulness made us both LOL for approximately ten years.
(For the benefit of those who aren't fat, and can't appreciate why this is funny: When you are a fat lady—and possibly a fat man, but that is not a body in which I've lived—you spend your life receiving many absurdly nonsequiturial suggestions under the auspices of Very Helpfulness about all the many things you could do to lose weight. Like: Create more hours in your day to volunteer more!)
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