This too is a real thing in the world. It's one of those gumball-type vending machines. (I am sure maybe they have a real name.) I love those things. I am always buying stupid crap out of them. It's clutters my house until I get annoyed and toss it in the donate box in the garage.
Anyway, one at a supermarket near my home sells "Fuzzy Face Moustaches." Of course, what it probably should say is "Fag Moustaches" because that is quite clearly a drawing of the Village People.
You've got the Construction Worker, the Leatherman, the Cowboy. This vending machine is one Cop away from an "In the Navy" sing-along.
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