Important Announcement

I have never watched an episode of Dancing With the Stars, and, to be filed under "Things That Won't Change That," is the announcement that the new cast for the upcoming season includes former House Majority Leader and ex-con Tom DeLay:

"His leadership was characterized by his aggressive 'Grow the Vote' method of party discipline where he never lost a vote, leading the Washington Post to nickname him 'The Hammer'."—Hey, ABC: You forgot to mention that his leadership was also characterized by ten fuckloads of criminal corruption.

Remember when Tucker Carlson was on Dancing With the Stars? (Good times.) What is it with that show's insistence on reviving the careers of conservative has-beens? Is ABC secretly participating in some sort of rehabilitation program?

I swear to Maude if Dick Cheney shows up on Lost, I will go totally trucknutz.