WWJS*

I don't often open spam but this one somehow managed to get past my filter and the title ("Donation") made me give it another glance thinking someone may want to donate to Shakesville, as occasionally people use the ShakerGourmet email to talk about site stuff.

I was just a wee bit wrong:

Dearest in Christ,

Greetings in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, I am Mrs marilyn wells. from Kuwait. I am married to Mr. johnson wells who worked with Kuwait embassy in Ivory Coast for nine years before he died in the year 2004.We were married for eleven years without a child. He died after a brief illness that lasted for only four days.Before his death we were both born again christian.

Since his death I decided not to remarry or get a child outside my matrimonial home which the Bible is against.When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of US$3.5million dollars in a Bank here in Abidjan Cote d'Ivoire. Presently, this money is still in bank.Recently, my Doctor told me that I would not last for the next Eight months due to cancer problem. The one that disturbs me most is my stroke sickness.

Little Billy Evans, is that you?

But it really disqualifies me/us from meeeeeellions of dollars shortly:

Having known my condition I decided to donate this fund to a charity organization that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct herein. I want an organization that will use this fund for orphanages, school and church ,widows, propagating the word of God and to endeavor that the house of God is maintained. The Bible made us to understand that "Blessed is the hand that giveth".I took this decision because I don't have any child that will inherit this money and my husband relatives are not Christians and I don't want my husband's efforts to be used by unbelievers.

I don't want a situation where this money will be used in an ungodly way. [...]

Me? Ungodly? Never! *gasp*

So preying upon the religious 'sensibilities' of the sucker who would fall for this bullshit, here is the point to steal said sucker's money all snuggled up in the bosom of Jesus:

I know that I am going to be in the bosom of the Lord. Exodus 14 VS 14 says that "the lord will fight my case and I shall hold my peace". I don't need any telephone communication in this regard because of my health hence the presence of my husband's relatives around me always. I don't want them to know about this development.With God all things are possible. As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the Bank here in Abidjan Cote d'Ivoire.

Contact me on this email xxxxxxxxx@xxxxx.xxx delay in your reply will give me room in sourcing another church for this same purpose. Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I Stated herein. Hoping to receive your reply. Remain blessed in the Lord.

Uh-huh. *What Would Jesus Steal?