It's a STEAL!

In honor of the second anniversary of Katrina—and just in time for the new Attorney General nomination!—the Bush administration has made available by special release (and in limited edition!) this spectacular compilation that's a "must-have" for every serious collector. This item won't be sold in stores, and is being offered exclusively through fine retailers like Shakes-Mart, so pick up your phone and dial 1-866-FUCK-YOU now to get your copy of Chertoff's Greatest Hits.

Chertoff's Greatest Hits includes such unforgettable numbers as:

"I Was Very Disturbed to Learn Early Tuesday Morning That There Had Been a Substantial and Irreparable Breach"

"I Have Not Heard a Report of Thousands of People in the Convention Center Who Don't Have Food and Water"


"Louisiana Is a City That Is Largely Under Water"

Not to mention classics like:

"Well, I Said in July Before Katrina That We Had a Lot More Work to Do in Preparedness and I Think That Was Borne Out, Obviously, A Month Later"

"Essentially the Lake Was Going to Start to Drain into the City. I Think That Second Catastrophe Really Caught Everybody By Surprise"


"One of the Things I Said Was We're Racing the Clock. Unfortunately, the Hurricane Beat Us"

Plus the fan-favorite B-sides:

"Mike Brown Has Done Everything He Possibly Could to Coordinate the Federal Response to This Unprecedented Challenge. I Appreciate His Work, as Does Everybody Here"


"I Thought I Was About As Clear As I Possibly Could Be in English as to What I'm Doing and Why I'm Doing It. Next Question"

Quantities are limited—so act now! This beauty can be yours for the low, low price of:

Cost of the War in Iraq
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