Question of the Day

When was the last time you felt totally, absurdly pathetic?

My girlfriend Miller just sent me an email that reminded me of a sad lament I directed at the eminently patient Mr. Shakes recently. One of my wisdom teeth only ever came in halfway, and about three weeks ago, it decided to come in a wee bit more. My entire jaw radiated with pain, and I was practically drooling with an overflow of saliva. In other words, I was teething. And it had put me in precisely the same mood as it does a baby.

In a moment of great, pitiable crankiness, I whined: "I'm teething, my face is broken out, and I've got gray hair coming in. I don't think it's remotely fair that I must address the complaints of infancy, adolescence, and old age all at once."

And then I burst into tears.

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