The Gut Speaks

The legendary Bush Gut, which, combined with the president’s amazing ocular powers of soul-knowing, has discerned the goodness of various world leaders, including most famously Vladimir “Pootie-Poot” Putin, has spoken once again, favorably sizing up Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki.

President Bush flew to Baghdad last week to size up Iraq's new leader. "I have come not only to thank you," he told American troops gathered in the Green Zone on Tuesday, "but to look Prime Minister Maliki in the eyes -- to determine whether or not he is as dedicated to a free Iraq as you are."

The presidential determination? "I believe he is," Bush said.

This is good news indeed. The Bush Gut’s track record is stellar, having been utilized at Harken Oil and Gas (nee Spectrum 7, nee Bush Exploration, nee Arbusto Energy), which saw a $23.2 million loss in 1990, the Texas Rangers (including trading away Sammy Sosa), and throughout his tenure at the White House, in decidings about tax cuts, the Iraq War, and—though it was not widely reported—a hypothesis involving pretzels as an oxygen substitute.

Now the Bush Gut sees good things to come for Iraq. That’s good enough for me—as well it should be for any patriot.

(Crossposted at Ezra’s place.)