"Oh, yeah. That's the spot."
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.
Daily Dose of Cute
"Oh, yeah. That's the spot."
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.
The Friday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by fizzy drinks.
Recommended reading:
Jadehawk: [Content Note: Reproductive coercion] Why I'm Skeptical of Efforts to Criminalize the Sabotage of Birth Control
Jen: [CN: Discussion of various privileges] When "Life Hacking" Is Really White Privilege
Ayesha and Sally: [CN: Exploitation] Cross-Border Surrogacy: How Our Bodies Ourselves Is Advancing Public Discourse and Action
Gut-Her Punk: [CN: Transphobia; gender policing] How to Support Your Trans Teammate
Veronica: [CN: Sexual violence; police malfeasance] Today in Rape Culture
BYP: [CN: Racism] Study: Black Males Twice as Likely to be Suspended at Schools in Virginia
Trudy: [CN: Injury; racism] An Update on My Brother Chris and GoFundMe
Melissa and Inkoo: Best Women-Directed Films of 2013
Leave your links and recommendations in comments...
Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime
Nellie Furtado: "I'm Like a Bird"
This week's TMNS brought to you by songs about birds.
In the News
Here is some stuff in the news today!
The Obama administration has granted a temporary exemption from the Affordable Care Act's individual mandate. Ezra Klein details "how they're doing it—and what it means for the law."
[Content Note: War; death] At least 30,000 civilians in South Sudan are seeking refuge in United Nations outposts after President Salva Kiir accused his former vice president, Riek Machar, of attempting a military coup, which Machar denies. "There have been unconfirmed reports that more than 500 people have been killed and that sectarian animosities between the Dinka and Nuer ethnic groups have been inflamed." The civilian population is increasingly at risk as the political situation deteriorates.
In a terrible reminder that this sort of governmental breakdown has vast devastating effects, even beyond immediate violence [CN: Death via disease]: A bubonic plague outbreak has killed 32 people in the last month in Madagascar. "Last year, Madagascar reported 60 deaths from bubonic plague. Poor hygiene and declining living standards as a result of a protracted political crisis since a coup in 2009 are cited as the primary causes of the spread of the disease."
[CN: Sexual assault in the US military] President Obama has ordered a review of the military's response to sexual assault in the armed forces, saying his administration has "an urgent obligation" to respond. But not that urgent: "The president is giving military leaders a year to report on their progress in responding to the crime."
Democratic Representative Barbara Lee, who is pretty much made of awesome, has introduced a bill called the Repealing Ineffective and Incomplete Abstinence-Only Program Funding Act of 2013 (HR 3774), which would end federal funding of abstinence-only programs and support comprehensive sexuality education. "We need to get serious about educating our young people about sex," said Lee. "Abstinence-only programs fail to address the challenge of unplanned pregnancies and sexually-transmitted infections among our youth, which have reached a critical level. We must ensure that we provide comprehensive sex education programs that have been proven to work, instead of throwing money away on programs that don't."
[CN: Threat of war] Whut: "A South Korean news agency reported Friday that the North has threatened a 'merciless' attack without notice in response to anti-North rallies this week—and that it sent the warning by fax."
[CN: Injury] An investigation has begun into what caused a London theater to collapse, wounding more than 70 people, seven of them seriously.
Verizon says it will disclose "information on the number of requests for customer records it received from law enforcement agencies this year. ...The report will provide the total number of law-enforcement agency requests Verizon received in criminal cases, the company said. In addition, it will break that data into categories including subpoenas, court orders and warrants. Verizon said it also will provide other details about the requests for customer data."
[CN: War on agency; misogyny; Christian Supremacy] ACLU: "Before You Go to a Catholic Hospital, Read This." Of course, if you're insured and not independently wealthy and the only in-network hospitals to which you have access are Catholic hospitals, there's not much choice about whether to go to a Catholic hospital.
Dogs probably recognize their guardians' faces, even in photos.
Kathleen Turner: "I don't look like I did 30 years ago. Get over it!" Awesome. Totally awesome.
Recommended Reading on Twitter: #FreeMarissa
This is a very sweet story.
[Content Note: Injury; terrorism.]
I don't know how James Costello and Krista D'Agostino view fate or destiny or the meaning of life, but something I use in my own life is the idea that we can retroactively give meaning to the tough things that happen to us, and this story seems like a very sweet example of that:
Boston Marathon bombing victim James Costello believes the worst moment of his life was a blessing in disguise.All the blubs forever. Congratulations to both of them.
Being injured in the April 15 attack led Costello, 31, to meet his future bride, Krista D’Agostino, while she was working a six-week temporary stint as a traveling nurse at Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital. He was transferred there after undergoing multiple surgeries over two weeks at Massachusetts General Hospital, and the two began a relationship that culminated in a wedding proposal in France during a recent 10-day trip.
..."I now realized why I was involved in the tragedy," Costello wrote on Facebook. "It was to meet my best friend, and the love of my life. Eight months later I'm happy to announce that we will spend the rest of our lives together."
Costello's story of finding love after tragedy touched people across the world, who recognized him as the subject of one of the most widely viewed images in the wake of the blast. A photographer captured Costello staggering through the streets with his clothes shredded and his legs burned. ...At the moment the bomb went off, Costello had been walking toward the Boston Marathon's finish line with five of his friends to cheer on others. Three of those friends each lost a leg; the others suffered extensive burns and shrapnel wounds. Costello underwent multiple surgeries, including several skin grafts, and then met D'Agostino during his recovery.
"I had noticed her in passing, and shortly after that she came into my room to cover a lunch break and change the dressing on my leg, and still no thoughts of (romance)," Costello said. "Then, after we realized we had some mutual friends, we started talking, and I invited her to a benefit."
What drew her to him? "That smile," D'Agostino said.
Duck Dynasty Family Statement
[Content Note: Homophobia; racism; Christian Supremacy.]
Following the Duck Dynasty patriarch's homophobic and racist treatise in GQ, and subsequent imposed hiatus by A&E, the Robertson family has released this awesome statement:
We want to thank all of you for your prayers and support. The family has spent much time in prayer since learning of A&E's decision. We want you to know that first and foremost we are a family rooted in our faith in God and our belief that the Bible is His word. While some of Phil's unfiltered comments to the reporter were coarse, his beliefs are grounded in the teachings of the Bible. Phil is a Godly man who follows what the Bible says are the greatest commandments: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart" and "Love your neighbor as yourself." Phil would never incite or encourage hate. We are disappointed that Phil has been placed on hiatus for expressing his faith, which is his constitutionally protected right. We have had a successful working relationship with A&E but, as a family, we cannot imagine the show going forward without our patriarch at the helm. We are in discussions with A&E to see what that means for the future of Duck Dynasty. Again, thank you for your continued support of our family.I don't have a whole lot to say about that heap of garbage, which pretends that there is One True Christianity and imagines that rank homophobia and racism doesn't incite or encourage hatred, because it's so thoroughly contemptible that it hardly necessitates comment among people with agreement about basic human decency.
I do, however, want to observe that the Robertson family (or whatever hired spinmaster composed this dreck on their behalf) is borrowing the new conservative spin on bigotry: It's not that the ides themselves are hideously objectionable; it's just about the way they were expressed. "While some of Phil's unfiltered comments to the reporter were coarse..."
Listen, conservatives: Bigotry isn't a problem that gets fixed with better PR. I am well aware of the conservative movement's investment in magic words and carefully constructed market-tested rhetoric. I am keenly aware of the history in which garbage policies (upwards wealth redistribution) have been sold to voters with clever sound bytes (trickle-down economics). And while you may still get away with some race-baiting and homophobic fearmongering and misogynist oppression using dogwhistles designed for your "traditional" base, the ongoing problem for your dwindling rump of a movement is not that the words you use to express your bigotry aren't pretty enough—it's that your ideology is unconcealably ugly.
Question of the Day
Will you be making any New Year resolutions?
I never make New Year resolutions, because I know myself well enough to acknowledge I only do what I need to do when I'm ready to do it, and arbitrary dates don't help me get there any damn faster, lol.
Photo of the Day
A 50-ton whale appears under a tiny tourist boat off the Argentinian coast. Via Slade.
Woot!
Congratulations, New Mexico!
Today, the New Mexico Supreme Court issued a landmark decision in a lawsuit seeking clarification on laws regarding the freedom to marry in the state. ...The court ruling (PDF) states:
We conclude that the purpose of New Mexico marriage laws is to bring stability and order to the legal relationship of committed couples by defining their rights and responsibilities as to one another, their children if they choose to raise children together, and their property.
Prohibiting same-gender marriages is not substantially related to the governmental interests advanced by the parties opposing same-gender marriage or to the purposes we have identified. Therefore, barring individuals from marrying and depriving them of the rights, protections, and responsibilities of civil marriage solely because of their sexual orientation violates the Equal Protection Clause under Article II, Section 18 of the New Mexico Constitution.
We hold that the State of New Mexico is constitutionally required to allow same-gender couples to marry and must extend to them the rights, protections, and responsibilities that derive from civil marriage under New Mexico law.
Discussion Thread: Feminist Anthems
We've done this one before, but since there's always new music and always new readers, and because I've had a couple of requests to repeat it, I thought we'd do it again. What are some of your favorite feminist/womanist anthems, to which you like to listen when you need a shot of empowerment?
Readers who cannot or prefer not to listen to music are welcome to submit their favorite poems, lyrics, quotes, or preferred alternative(s).
Programming Notes
1. A couple of people using IE have reported having issues with comments loading. Disqus recommended clearing out your browser's cache and cookies, and the people who were having problems now say comments are loading again. So, if you've been having problems, give that a try.
2. Comments appear to be disappearing from the page after you post them. They're not being lost, I promise. What's happening is that comments are being registered in Disqus' system, but then there's a lag time in their being posted to the page. It only looks like they're disappearing because they're visible to the author right after posting. They do, however, show up on the page once Disqus shoots them out of the database, and there's about a short lag time at the moment.
I'm sorry for the inconvenience. But be assured your comments are there! They're just taking a few minutes to post to the page. Disqus knows we're having an ongoing issue, and they're working on it. Hopefully it'll get fixed soon.
3. Just a quick reminder to not use the reply function in order to maintain flat threads to accommodate people with visual processing disabilities that make nested threads tough to navigate. Thanks so much for your understanding.
Assvertising
[Content Note: Misogyny.]
Every single year around Christmastime, there is some advert (or multiple adverts) the premise of which is a straight dude buying THE PERFECT GIFT for his wife, so she can use it to do something for him. To wit, this Walmart/KitchenAid commercial, which I have seen 97 zillion times in the last couple of weeks:
As up-tempo Christmas music plays in the background, a middle-aged, in-betweenie sized black man stands in an aisle at Walmart looking at a stand mixer.Dad, you own this season—for buying something for Mom that she can use to bake you delicious cake!
A female voiceover says: "It is better to give than receive. Just give someone who loves to bake a KitchenAid mixer."
The man envisions a holiday cake disappearing piece by piece. "Yummy!" says the female voiceover.
Cut back to the man holding the mixer under his arm, while standing in a Superman stance with one hand on his hip, looking into the distance, pleased with himself.
"Dad, you own this season!" says the voiceover. A male voiceover kicks in to talk about the benefits of shopping at Walmart. The end.
I find these adverts only slightly less objectionable than the ones where men are buying jewelry with the implication it will get them laid.
Safe Space
Last night, I saw my oft-mentioned friend Miller, whom I met fifteen years ago when she was hired to replace me after I got promoted at my first job out of college and I was tasked with training her. What I remember most about her first day was that every system in the office was going haywire and everyone was in a bad mood—which was appropriate preparation for the rest of her time there.
We were not friends from the start.
Miller loves to recall how she hated me when we first met. Because she thought I hated her. She was stuck at the reception desk, and I would blow by with knitted brows and a snarl, informing her brusquely, "I'm going for a smoke." She thought, reasonably, that I was a total asshole. It was only later, after she realized we were working in an actual hell, that she began to understand my seemingly stroppy demeanor.
We became friends on a very specific day that both of us can name. Miller had thrown out her back, and she was stuck at home by herself, barely mobile. A few years earlier, I had been in the same position, but I was living with someone; I hadn't been on my own and couldn't imagine how I would have gotten through it without his help. So, even though I knew Miller wasn't too fond of me, I headed over to her place after work, armed with pizza and the offer of good company, and we've been friends ever since.
By coincidence, we lived two blocks apart in all of Chicago, when we first started working together. We would spend all day in the office together, ride the train home together, and then spend at least an hour on the phone every night, processing the day's garbage and talking about nonsense and quoting Eddie Izzard at each other.
Fridays, in the summer, when we had half-days, we would go to lunch at Leona's, and sit for hours and hours between the lunchtime and dinnertime rushes, talking and laughing and splitting appetizers. And then we would leave a 100% tip, or more, for whichever member of the waitstaff indulged our languorous lunches.
Eventually, Miller left the job at which we'd met, and moved on to another firm nearby. I stayed for a few years more, until I quit to move to Scotland to await Iain's visa approval.
Miller was the first of any of my friends or family to meet Iain. By that time, she was living and working in London, and when I told her I was crossing the pond to meet a Scotsman with whom I'd fallen in love after meeting online, she was understandably dubious. "And then I saw them together," she would say, if she were telling this story.
We all went for dinner at a Greek restaurant, and Iain tried moussaka for the first time, prompting him to declare, "Fuck you, lasagna! I'm a moussaka man now!" We laughed so much that night, the three of us, and I remember this feeling of perfect contentment, because Miller had met Iain and Iain had met Miller and they liked each other. She's such a nice girl. He's such a great guy. They whispered to me in turn.
In the intervening years, our friendship has spanned decades and continents, as Miller has lived in Ireland, England, and Brazil, and I have lived in Scotland. Relationships in both our lives have come and gone. Now we are both back in the US, living on either side of a state border.
We're different in some ways: Miller once told me that if she wears her heart on her sleeve, I wear my brain on mine. She reacts; I deliberate. She is as naturally outgoing as I am naturally shy. And we are very, very alike in some ways, too. We are both risk-takers; we are both voracious devourers of information; we are obstinate. We are fiercely ourselves, in tenacious defiance of the sometimes overwhelming pressure to be something else.
Our friendship has endured, while others have fallen away, for some of the obvious reasons—we talk shit out when we piss each other off; we have grown in similar trajectories; we have that ineffable thing that is typically described as chemistry, which keeps us drawn to one another—but also for the simple, magnificent reason that we are each other's indefatigable champions.
I believe in Miller. And she believes in me.
Every harebrained, crackpot scheme; every impulsive move to another country; every possible and impossible dream either of us has had, the other one is there.
It's not that we never expect the other to fall; it's just that we promise to be there if that happens. There are plenty of people who will try to talk you out of something, and precious few who will simply say, "If it doesn't work, you're strong enough to survive it. And I'll have your back."
We don't compete. We don't audit each other's choices. We don't offer unsolicited advice. We don't judge. (I mean, shit, I'm sure there are times we've each internally thought: "She's lost the plot!" but, you know, lol.) We just get each other's backs.
We have always, without any plan or discussion, offered one another the very humanizing and invaluably supportive gift of as much room to fail as to succeed. A safe space.
Our friendship wasn't forged in activism or ideology, the way many of my adult friendships have been. We were two fat girls working admin in an office, who happened to cross each other's paths, just as they were learning how to be grown-ups. It was chance.
Well, chance and a pizza from Villa Palermo.
Last night, as we split appetizers, Miller showed me the long pink scar on her left forearm, left by a bike accident earlier this year. I showed her the tattoo on my left forearm, inked earlier this year. Arrange whatever pieces come your way. Marks of our journey.
May it continue ever on.
Daily Dose of Cute
Dudley, fast asleep with grody beef tongue.
The tongue doesn't move even when we wakes up to streeeeeeeeetch, lol.
As always, please feel welcome and encouraged to share pix of the fuzzy, feathered, or scaled members of your family in comments.
Headline of the Day
[Content Note for disablist slur at link.]
BBC interviews random man on the street who turns out to be the Fonz.
In the News
Here is some stuff in the news today!
[Content Note: Homophobia; racism] Something something some heapshit with a reality show said some reprehensible garbage that was homophobic and racist and terrible, and now he's on "indefinite hiatus." Well, A&E let Dog the Bounty Hunter back after like two seconds, so I'm sure this asshole has nothing to worry about.
Meanwhile, Republicans Sarah Palin and Bobby Jindal are defending this guy, because of course they are.
[CN: Torture; rendition] Congress is working on a deal to "lift the most rigid restrictions Congress previously imposed on detainee transfers overseas," but Republicans are still determined to keep open the prison at Guantánamo Bay.
Democratic Senator Elizabeth Warren has introduced The Equal Employment for All Act, which would prohibit employers from requiring potential employees to disclose their credit history.
If you shopped at Target between November 27 and December 15, your credit/debit data may be compromised: "Target said Thursday that the credit and debit card information of as many as 40 million customers was compromised over three weeks of the holiday shopping season—one of the largest breaches ever of American consumer data. ...Target said that the information compromised included customer names, card numbers, expiration dates and the short verification codes known as CVVs—everything an attacker would need to create a counterfeit card."
[CN: Racism] Democratic Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid urges the owner of the Washington R------s to change the team's name.
[Note: Ad plays automatically at link] Beyoncé's new album has sold more than one million copies worldwide in less than a week. !!!
Cecil Williams and his dog Orlando, whose story Aphra shared yesterday, will not be separated: "Seeing a chance to help, a good Samaritan started a crowdfunding campaign on Wednesday, with a goal of raising $50,000 to help Williams. ...Generous backers quickly flooded the campaign with cash, donating more than $65,000 in less than 24 hours. Cecil will now be able to not only keep, but spoil the heroic dog that saved his life." Blub.
Justin Long continues to be a delight.
Paul Rudd is maybe going to be Ant-Man. Do you approve of this potential casting? Y/N? Seems fine to me!
Republicans for Child Labor
[Content Note: Child exploitation; class warfare.]
Georgia Representative Jack Kingston is the latest Republican to suggest that poor children should become janitors in exchange for food. You know—so they can learn the lessons about hard work and bootstraps that their lazy parents aren't teaching them.
On Saturday, Kingston, who is vying to be his party's nominee in Georgia's Senate race next year, spoke at a meeting of the Jackson County Republican Party about the federal school lunch program.Republicans think people aren't entitled to food. REPUBLICANS THINK PEOPLE AREN'T ENTITLED TO FOOD.
Under that program, children from families with incomes at or below 130 percent of the poverty line are eligible for free meals. Students from families with incomes between 130 percent and 185 percent of the poverty level can receive lunches at reduced prices.
But on Saturday, Kingston came out against free lunches, saying that children should have to pay at least a nominal amount or do some work like sweeping cafeteria floors.
"But one of the things I've talked to the secretary of agriculture about: Why don't you have the kids pay a dime, pay a nickel to instill in them that there is, in fact, no such thing as a free lunch? Or maybe sweep the floor of the cafeteria -- and yes, I understand that that would be an administrative problem, and I understand that it would probably lose you money. But think what we would gain as a society in getting people -- getting the myth out of their head that there is such a thing as a free lunch," he said.
Republicans think poor, hungry children aren't entitled to food, and that it is a smart idea to make children who are already not getting enough calories in their daily diets do manual labor in exchange for food.
Here is the goddamned deal: If you want to support an unfettered, unregulated, unholy model of capitalism, in which some people can become obscenely wealthy by exploiting the fuck out of other people, then you don't get to call those exploited people lazy and shiftless and undeserving. What you do is SUBSIDIZE THEIR BASIC NEEDS. The end.
Kingston is, of course, not the first Republican to suggest child labor in exchange for food. Earlier this year, West Virginia State Del. Ray Canterbury said during a floor debate on a school lunch bill: "I think it would be a good idea if perhaps we had the kids work for their lunches: trash to be taken out, hallways to be swept, lawns to be mowed, make them earn it. If they miss a lunch or they miss a meal they might not, in that class that afternoon, learn to add, they may not learn to diagram a sentence, but they'll learn a more important lesson."
And in December 2011, then-presidential candidate Newt Gingrich suggested, "Most of these schools ought to get rid of the unionized janitors, have one master janitor and pay local students to take care of the school. The kids would actually do work, they would have cash, they would have pride in the schools, they'd begin the process of rising." And then defended that proposal by saying: "Really poor children in really poor neighborhoods have no habits for working and have nobody around them who works."
My contempt for this colossal indecency cannot be measured on a scale fathomable by human intellect.
Most Exhausted of Your Questions Person of Ever
Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is Barbara Walters' Most Fascinating Person of 2013. And, naturally, the discussion turned to whether Clinton is going to run for president again. Because nothing Hillary Clinton ever does is as fascinating as what she might do.
[Clinton] insisted she had not made up her mind about running for president and would not make up her mind until 2014.So does that mean everyone will stop asking Clinton about whether she's running until next year? No? Awesome.
"I will look carefully at what I think I can do and make that decision sometime next year," she said.
Clinton said the country's economic concerns, including food stamps and a high unemployment rate, were more pressing than her future political prospects.
"It's such a difficult decision, and it's one that I'm not going to rush into," she said. "And I don't think we should be looking at the next election. I think we should be looking at the work we have today."
