How about you?
Open Thread
This week's open threads have been brought to you by root vegetables.
The Virtual Pub Is Open
[Explanations: lol your fat. pathetic anger bread. hey your gay.]
(See what I did there?)
TFIF, Shakers!
Belly up to the bar,
and name your poison!
And don't forget to tip your bartender!
This is so the worst thing you're going to read all day.
[Content Note: Misogyny; gender essentialism; heterocentrism.]
Normally, I wouldn't even link to the World Net Daily, home of such journalistic luminaries as Chuck Norris and David "The Lesser" Limbaugh, but this is impressively terrible even by the WND's peerless garbage standards:
Actual screencap of actual headline and obviously perfect stock photo.
It's just a super article SORRY TO SPOIL THE SURPRISE OF GREATNESS FOR YOU with terrific stuff like:
Despite your beauty and brilliance, it could be your attitude that's preventing you from finding a husband and keeping him.And:
Suzanne Venker in her hot new release, How to Choose a Husband and Make Peace With Marriage...faults the sexual revolution and feminist movement of the last 40 years for convincing women to not demand more of their relationships. ...But how can women find men who are good husbands, fathers and providers? Don't look to feminists for the answers, Venker warns. ...Venker said the feminist movement has taught women to stop needing men – for anything in life – from companionship to financial support or even childbearing.And:
Venker explains that the feminist culture has created unnecessary marital strife for one big reason: "Women are bitter. They're defensive; they're competitive; and they're ready to pounce... [E]quality is always the goal. Women want to prove they're strong and capable and can't be messed with. To them, that's power. But all women end up doing is proving to men how angry they are. And who wants to be with someone who's mad all the time?"I mean, that's just some solid advice right there. It's almost TOO GOOD, really. If Venker isn't careful, she's going to GREAT ADVICE Dr. Phil right out of a job, and that would be kinda bitchy.
Venker warns women to stop trying to compete with their husbands and to remove the "boss hat" when they get home – because marriage is about love, not competition and aggressiveness.
"Maybe women think being b-tchy is attractive since that's what they're attracted to. Women love guys who aren't sweet. They gravitate toward men who are confident, accomplished, and yes, full of themselves. Women are forever passing up the nice guy in favor of the jerk. But you can rarely turn this scenario around. Men don't want a b-tch for a wife. So don't be one."
Or not? I'm not sure if it technically makes one a bitch to go all "boss hat" in public. Are guys who don't want a bitch for a wife okay with bitches as colleagues and/or professional competitors? Anti-feminisming is hard. Maybe all of us should just resolve to defer to men at all times, just in case.
[Via HyperVocal.]
Headline of the Day
Kevin Drum: Conservatives Shocked to Discover Healthcare in America is Really Expensive.
The inevitable result of the instinct to task individuals with finding solutions to systemic problems (i.e. bootstraps) is ignorance about how systems work. Systems of oppression, governmental systems, the healthcare system...
It's often surprising to progressives how truly mystified so many conservatives seem about How Things Work, but it's a carefully cultivated and fastidiously maintained ignorance that abets the notion they achieve success exclusively on their own merits, and others fail exclusively on their own shortcomings.
And it's why conservatives who struggle blame totally the wrong entities for their struggles. People who don't understand systems look for scapegoats.
Obviously
What—did you think James Franco wasn't going to team up with director Christina Voros to film a documentary about Italian megabrand Gucci and its creative director, Frida Giannini? You're so weird.
That was always going to happen, because James Franco.
In other Vital Franco News, James Franco would, "under the right circumstances," have sex onscreen. So, for all of you who have been wondering if James Franco would be willing to have real sex onscreen for your Untitled James Franco Sexytimes Project, the answer is: MAYBE!
"I'd say under the right circumstances. There are a lot of circumstances," he said, with co-director [of Interior. Leather Bar.] Travis Mathews by his side. "Who's involved? Both behind-the-scenes, behind the camera, in front of the camera."I was going to make a respectful joke thanking Professor Franco of Necessary Observations at Priorities University, but then I realized that I do have a life that sometimes requires not documenting every single piece of Vital Franco News, and there is a strong possibility that I missed he is actually employed as a Professor of Necessary Observations at Priorities University, and wouldn't that make me look silly.
..."It's hard to put certain kinds of sex in film," Franco said. "Now, I could sort of understand that if it wasn't so easy to put other kinds of things in film, like violence. Obviously, there's some weird standard here that is just illogical."
[H/T to my friend Todd for the Gucci link.]
Friday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by spiral notebooks.
Recommended Reading:
Igor: Everything You Need to Know about the Administration's New Birth Control Rules
Rebecca: Genderswapped Children's Stories
Jeremy: This Is That Post Where a Catholic Leader Likens My Marriage to Men Squirting Milk out of Their Nipples
Dave: Lawmakers Press for Answers on Sale of Wild Horses
Emily: Fat-Shamed by OG/GYN
Andy: Documentary Explores Dangerous World for Gays in Jamaica
Angry Asian Man: Cibu, Your "Asian Inspired" Beauty Product Names Are the Worst
Trudy: What an Adorable Book!
Echidne: Good News Friday
Yatima: Announcing Geek Feminism Book Club!
Leave your links and recommendations in comments...
Quote of the Day
"Hillary has transformed our understanding—no, our definition—of foreign affairs. Diplomacy is no longer just the skill of managing relations with other countries. The big issues—war and peace, terror, economic stability, etc.—remain, and she has handled them with firmness and authority, with poise and confidence, and with good will, when appropriate. But it is not the praise of diplomats or dictators that will be her legacy. She dealt with plenipotentiaries, but her focus was on people. Foreign affairs isn't just about treaties, she taught us, it's about the suffering and aspirations of those affected by the treaties, made or unmade. Most of all, diplomacy should refocus attention on the powerless. Of course, Hillary wasn't the first secretary of state to advocate for human rights or use the post to raise awareness of abuses or negotiate humanitarian relief or pressure oppressors. But she was the first to focus on empowerment, particularly of women and girls."—Donna Brazile, Democratic strategist, writer, professor, and commentator, on Hillary Clinton's legacy (or at least part of it) as Secretary of State.
Reproductive Rights Updates: Arkansas, Virgina, Washington, Michigan, North Dakota
You know what they say: new legislative session, new asinine horseshit legislation. They do say that, right? I'm pretty sure they do.
In Arkansas, Republican Jason Rapert proposed "heartbeat" legislation that would ban abortion if cardiac activity is detected.
LITTLE ROCK — Arkansas senators advanced a proposal Wednesday to ban most abortions if a fetal heartbeat is detected, a move that would prohibit the procedure as early as six weeks into a pregnancy, despite a warning from opponents that it would open the state up to legal challenges.And I simply recognize that a heartbeat does not a viable fetus make. Or even a heart itself: cardiac cells can beat in a petri dish. But, Jason Rapert (R-Conway), don't let science get in the way of your self-righteousness!
The Senate Public Health, Welfare and Labor Committee endorsed by a voice vote legislation that would require a test to detect a fetal heartbeat before an abortion is performed. If one is detected, a woman could not have an abortion, except in cases of rape, incest and if a mother's life is in danger.
The measure heads to a vote in the Republican-controlled Senate, where it's sponsored by 19 of the chamber's 35 members.
"I simply recognize that without a heartbeat, there is no life, and life must be protected," Sen. Jason Rapert, R-Conway, the bill's chief sponsor, told reporters after Wednesday's hearing.
If you recall, Ohio attempted this same sort of thing, though this Arkansas legislation comes with even harsher penalties: medical personnel who perform abortions "could face a Class D felony, punishable by up to six years in prison and a fine of up to $10,000".
***
In Virgina, the final bill left to help fight against mandatory ultrasounds was defeated.
RICHMOND — A Republican-run Senate committee swiftly killed legislation Monday that would have made Virginia’s mandatory pre-abortion ultrasound exams optional after the committee chairman blocked discussion of the bill.When that excuse didn't work, Martin then said that there wasn't any need to discuss it because it was just like other legislation they shot down, any minor differences in wording aside. Another committee member, Janet Howell (D-Fairfax) said she wasn't aware of it being on the agenda until minutes before the meeting started.
The hastily convened Privileges and Elections Committee special meeting lasted just minutes with Sen. Ralph S. Northam’s bill dying on a party-line vote. Six Republicans opposed and three Democrats supported it. Once proxy votes from absent Republicans were added, the final tally swelled to 8-3. Four committee Democrats did not vote.
“What a kangaroo court this is, Mr. Chairman. This is an embarrassment,” Mr. Northam huffed after committee Chairman Stephen H. Martin ordered a roll call vote while stifling efforts by Mr. Northam, a Norfolk Democrat who is a doctor, and at least one other physician to testify for the bill.
Mr. Martin, Chesterfield Republican, contended the committee had already discussed the bill. Its history in the Legislative Information System, however, showed that Senate Bill 1332 had never been before a committee or a subcommittee.
That's some awesome governing right there.
***
Teaspoon Like Beckham
Becks at the press conference in which he announced the donation of his salary.
In case you forgot for a moment that David Beckham is the greatest, here is a reminder that David Beckham is the greatest [H/T to Jess]:
"It has never been about the biggest contract or the money," said David Beckham in his press conference today announcing his five-month deal to join Paris Saint-Germain of the French Ligue 1.The Beckhams can afford it. They're already very wealthy, and he'll still make fuckloads of cash from endorsements. But there aren't a lot of people who can afford to donate a million dollars a month (!) to charity, and precious few of the ones who can, do.
"It's always been about playing football. I've been lucky to achieve what I've achieved and earned what I've earned."
The 37-year old highest paid soccer player in the world's most popular sport put his money where his mouth is. The "huge sum" Beckham confirmed he would earn — estimated at €800,000 ($1 million) a month, nearly double his salary at his previous club, the Los Angeles Galaxy — will all be donated to a yet-to-be-named Parisien children's charity.
It's a move in line with Beckham's (and his wife, Victoria's) philanthropic efforts. As a UNICEF ambassador since 1999, he has championed such childhood causes as malnutrition, domestic abuse and trafficking among others. The power couple also operates a charity to provide wheelchairs to disabled youth.
That is a big teaspoon.
[Note: I am not saying that David Beckham is perfect! I am sure he has all kinds of human flaws, like unexamined privilege or forgetting to put his stinky socks in the hamper! I am just saying he's PRETTY GREAT!]
In The News
Your regular In The News correspondent, Deeky W. Gashlycrumb, MD., is off while he moves into his new evil lair apartment.
[Content Note: Terrorism; hostility to agency; misogynistic violence.]
Chuck Hagel was not super during his confirmation hearing. I guess people are surprised by this? Has nobody met Chuck Hagel before?
Two dead and others wounded, some seriously, after a suicide bomber hits the US embassy in Ankara, Turkey.
Congress, possibly the most ill-equipped group in the country to address technology issues, will battle over internet privacy in 2013. I'm sure they'll make all the best decisions!
The Department of Health and Human Services is expected to announce today that religiously affiliated employers "will be able to opt out of providing their employees with insurance coverage for contraceptives" in an exception to the contraception mandate. Speaking of good decisions!
In an actual good decision, Congress passed a new law as an amendment to the National Defense Authorization Act which "imposes a fine and a prison sentence of up to five years on those found guilty of sending girls under the age of 18 out of the country" for female genital cutting.
Hawaii legislators, at the request of Aerosmith lord Steven Tyler, have proposed legislation "to protect celebrities from paparazzi, giving famous faces power to sue over unwanted beach photos and other snapshots on the islands." It is weird to me that we need laws to protect anyone from any unwanted photography! Why are people so terrible?! Don't take pictures without permission, you knuckleheads!
This is an actual headline in the world: Hillary Clinton Takes a Rest, How Weird Is That?
Japanese scientists have recorded the first real-time video of thoughts forming in the brain. Neat!
Want. Wanty-want-want!
Photo of the Day
In the meantime, the clinic will remain defiantly pink. Clinic Owner Diane Derzis: "It says: We're right here, and we're not going anywhere."
TV Corner
There was no new Parks and Rec last night (WHUT?! BOO!), so no Parks and Rec thread. (Awwwwwww!) Instead, here is a general thread to talk about what you're watching, what TV shows (scripted or reality/competition) you're loving, what you're not loving, what you'd recommend to watch, and what you'd recommend to avoid.
Please be careful to warn about spoilers, as required!
Have at it.
RIP Ed Koch
Former Mayor of New York City Ed Koch has died from congestive heart failure at age 88. His New York Times obituary is here.
Koch was a Democrat, and then he wasn't. He was an effective mayor in some ways, and a failure in others. He was polarizing sometimes because he was challenging the status quo in a radical way, and sometimes because his policies were designed to protect privilege. He was not always sensitive to issues of race or gender. Nor was he generous about anyone who lived outside New York City, seemingly the only place in the US he deemed worthy of residence. His third term was plagued by corruption. His political career was marked by many successes.
He was an icon of New York, a product and reflection of the city in many ways, good and bad. He was a character.
It was, for much of his career, an open secret, or a rumor, that Koch was gay, questions about which Koch used to evade until during a single interview in 1989 he said he was not. He stock answer was that it was no one's business but his own. It was used against him in the ugliest way, during the 1977 mayoral campaign, when signs reading "Vote for Cuomo, Not the Homo" were posted around the city.
Mr. Koch did not respond at the time, but 12 years later, in his book "His Eminence and Hizzoner," he recalled, "When I first saw those posters, I cringed, and I wondered how I would be able to bear it."A rare confession of vulnerability from the mayor who once explained he wasn't the sort of person who got ulcers; he was the sort of person who gave other people ulcers. He was known for saying what he thought, come what may. Like most people with a disabled filter, that gave him both the capacity for charm and harm, in equal measure.
RIP Mr. Mayor.
[Note: If there are less flattering things to be said about Koch, they have been excluded because I am unaware of them, not as the result of any deliberate intent to whitewash his life. Please feel welcome to comment on the entirety of his work and life in this thread.]
Question of the Day
How many languages do you speak?
The only language in which I am fluent is English (although I seem to have problems typing it), and I speak a very little bit of German and a very little bit of Spanish—just enough of each that I am generally able to converse, if awkwardly, with a German or Spanish speaker who also speaks a very little bit of English, and is willing to charade out the rest.
I also know the alphabet in ASL, which has come in handy on a few occasions.
Photo of the Day
[Click to embiggen.]
From the Telegraph's Pictures of the Day for 31 January 2013: An almost full-circle rainbow at Victoria Falls taken by Nicole Cambre on the Zambian side of the falls. [Nicole Cambre / Rex Features]Lovely.
HA HA PERFECT
Geraldo Rivera is "truly contemplating" a run for the US Senate in New Jersey.
"I mention this only briefly, fasten your seatbelt," Rivera said on his radio show. "I mentioned this only briefly to my wife...but I am and I've been in touch with some people in the Republican Party in New Jersey. I am truly contemplating running for Senate against Frank Lautenberg or Cory Booker."That's so perfect because there are so many empty vaults that need investigating in the basement of the Capitol!
* * *
Because I have no commentary beyond a derisive snort, I will instead share (again) one of my favorite stories about my Nana Mil...
Once, she was visiting us in Indiana for the holidays (when I was about 13), and we saw a promo for an upcoming episode of Geraldo—back when he was a daytime talk show scandalmonger, before he became the highly reputable journalist for Fox News that he is today. It was one of those adverts that announced the topic and requested guests: "Prostitute Grannies! If you want your grandma to stop selling her body on the street, call 1-800…"
I told Nana that I was going to call, because I was tired of her wild whoring.
She took a long drag, exhaled with a raised eyebrow, pointed at me with her cigarette, and said without missing a beat: "Don't mess with my livelihood."
I laughed for approximately ten million years.
The Pink Petulance and her nana, who was being made to wear a book on her head, circa 1976.
