So, the White House had a contest in which people could submit their work to be chosen for the cover of this year's White House holiday card. And the image that First Lady Michelle Obama picked as the winner is this lovely image of Bo, the Obamas' dog, standing in the snow on the White House lawn, done by Des Moines, Iowa, artist Larassa Kabel.
Such a great image. Such a great idea to invite people to submit their work. Such a great concept for the card—Bo in the snow. Who couldn't love that?
The inside of the card reportedly reads, "This season, may your home be filled with family, friends, and the joy of the holidays." The card is signed by the entire First Family — along with Bo's paw print.
Vanity Fair deemed this year's Obama 'Holiday' card his best-ever in a posting titled, "Bo Obama: the True Meaning of Christmas."
The 2012 card made no mention of any specific holiday nor did it include a Bible verse noting the birth of Christ.
There are a lot of things I find amazing about this level of outage about what is essentially just a meager attempt at inclusion of non-Christians, but chief among them is how the rightwing spends 11 months out of the year bellowing about the values of our "Judeo-Christian" nation, and brags incessantly about their "Big Tent," but then throws a shit-fit about a "holiday card" that, despite its timing to coincide with Christmas sent out from a White House totally decorated for Christmas and occupied by a Christian family, makes an effort to acknowledge there are non-Christians in this country.
It's not that I'm amazed they engage in such breathtaking hypocrisy, because, hello, I've met the US rightwing—it's just that I'm continually amazed by how they engage in it without a trace of compunction or a shred of embarrassment at being associated with such colossal dipshittery.
Here is your topic: Top Five Favorite Riddles. Any kind of riddle—a word play riddle (like the classic Panda Bear joke/riddle), the sort of "how did this naked man end up in the middle of the desert" riddle, or a party riddle like "Bang Bang." Go!
Please feel welcome to share stories about why your Top Five picks are what they are, though a straight-up list is fine, too. Please refrain from negatively auditing other people's lists, because judgment discourages participation.
And a video that might make you blub until your head turns to dust. Fair warning.
[As with many animal rescue stories, some of these contain accounts of neglect and/or violence re: the circumstances from which the animal/s were rescued.]
Video Description: Piano music. A young beige man, with tattooed arms and piercings, wearing a Humane Society t-shirt, sits on a couch playing with a tiny chihuahua, whose jaw has been damaged, so its tongue is hanging out. Text Onscreen: "Humane Heroes: Adam & Billy."
In voiceover, Adam says, "I'm Adam Parascandola, and I'm a member of the Animal Rescue Team." Cut to footage of Adam and other members of the Humane Society's Animal Rescue Team at a run-down backyard breeding operation.
Alternating between voiceover over footage of the deplorable conditions at the puppy mill and speaking onscreen, he continues: "The first part of the story takes place in Jones County, North Carolina. Uh, we responded there to assist with a puppy mill. You know, we do so many of these puppy mill raids, and what we saw here was pretty typical of what we see everywhere—just a complete disregard for their emotional or physical health."
The dogs are in tiny, dirty crates throughout a house and several out-buildings. They bark for attention. They are in bad fucking shape. As the team begins to rescue them, Adam continues: "So, one of the buildings on the property was what looked to be a small shed, and I at first thought it was just a storage shed." There are dogs in cages all piled up in the shed. "The smell was just horrendous in there." On footage of the rescue, the rescuers observe that the water in dispensers attached to the cages is green.
Adam continues: "I immediately saw a cage with a small chihuahua in it." It's Billy! He looks terrible. "And I went to try to open the cage, and the latch was actually rusted shut." Footage of Adam trying to open the rusted cage. Billy paces in the cage. "This was his whole life. Really, I don't think he'd come out of that cage in years. What little food and water he had was probably just given through the bars."
Footage of Adam, having busted the cage open, reaching in gingerly for Billy. He holds Billy to his chest, carefully supporting him. "His whole bottom jaw, I mean, at least half of it, was missing." Billy licks Adam's face. "I mean, he was just—he was just a skeleton under his long fur."
On the footage of the rescue, a female veterinarian ranks Billy's body condition score as 1, the lowest possible ranking.
Adam continues in voiceover over footage of him petting Billy in his cage during the rescue, "All of the dogs that we get out of these rescue efforts, they want and need love and attention. But, when I got this little guy out," over footage of Adam holding Billy, "he laid his head on my shoulder, and, at that moment, I felt responsible for him." On camera: "And I felt responsible for making sure that he was never gonna have to suffer like that again."
Happy music. Footage of Adam and Billy at the rescue effort. Adam isn't letting Billy go. Billy looks pretty damn happy about that. Cut to Billy, all clean and filled out, running around on a rug on a living room floor. He is silly and joyful. Adam says, "You know, this little guy, despite all he'd been through, really very quickly his whole personality came out," over footage of Adam playing with Billy with a ball, "and, you know, it was so wonderful to be able to see what a character he is." Adam puts his head down, and Billy bumps his head against it and kisses Adam.
Cut to Adam sitting on the couch, petting Billy and smiling. "Meet Billy." He laughs. Billy's tongue hangs out. He is so evidently a happy dog. "He makes me laugh every single day. Um, I just love—I just love him." Billy licks Adam's hand, and Adam smiles.
In his workspace, Adam touches a picture that's hung up of the moment he rescued Billy and Billy laid his head on Adam's shoulder, then cuddles Billy. "Please be a hero for the animals. Make a special gift to support rescues like this, and all of the work that we do."
I've written before about how I hate the fuck out of pranks, which as far as I'm concerned are a form of bullying, and this story is, if the details of this story are accurate, the worst possible result of a "hilarious prank."
The details are these: Two Australian radio DJs called the hospital at which pregnant Duchess Kate Middleton was staying earlier in the week, and they pretended to be the Queen and Prince Charles. The nurse who answered transferred the call to Kate's room, where the DJs were able to ascertain some information about Kate's condition and care, which they then broadcast.
The DJs heavily promoted their awesome prank, and the call went viral, causing a lot of embarrassment for the hospital (although the Palace was reportedly very understanding) and for the nurse who placed the call (although the hospital defended her).
The nurse, a married mother of two sons, has now committed suicide.
"So Gayle and Jerry..." "I've thought about it a lot. There's no logical explanation."
(Spoilers are flashing their hoo-hahs herein.)
Oh, this episode. I LOVED this episode. The return of Duke Silver! Hello, Christie Brinkley! Did you know that Megan Mullalley (Tammy) and Nick Offerman (Ron Swanson) are married in real life? And did you know that Nick Offerman is a real-life super-talented woodworker? Neat, right?!
But mostly I loved this episode because Jerry. I have this profound affinity for Jerry (GARY!), and so everything about it made me blubby, especially when April and Tom were reading the nice emails that Jerry had sent them and they'd never read. I am tearing up just thinking about it. I love you, Jerry Gergich!
And Donna's heartbreaking expression when she realizes they need to go pick up Jerry. I love you, Donna Meagle!
I'd love to know what you all made of how the show handled the narratives of everyone being shocked that Jerry's wife is thin and beautiful, and how no one can understand why they'd be together. I thought it was pretty obviously a send-up of those narratives—it is apparent that she loves Jerry because he is a fucking awesome guy—but, like a lot of ironic humor, it also potentially entrenched those narratives. Hmm.
I also thought the show did a good job of playing on the trope that men are worth more if they have beautiful wives on their arms, because it's so evident Jerry doesn't consider Gayle his property, and Jerry's real value is repeatedly underlined as his kindness and fundamental decency.
But I can see why someone might feel otherwise! So what did you think?
I also love that Chris is finally making the transition from raw nerve to slightly less raw nerve, lol. He's a medium rare nerve now! Good job, Dr. Richard Nygard!
Here are other things!
"Merry Congratuchristmas! ... Jingle bells! Jingle yay! Jingle good for you!"
"I've had a Ron Swanson Google alert for seven years, and it finally paid off!"
"This time the giant spider got caught in MY web. Progress!"
"Hey, if we're going that way, can we stop at our place real quick, because I forgot to put on deodorant. And a jacket. And one of my socks. Plus I gotta poop. But I can stop anywhere for that."
"I don't know if you know this, but things with fat in them taste WAY better than things with no fat." "Everybody knows that."
"Wow, look at this room. So much wood, ready to be worked."
"I need to protect a sweet couple from a sex-crazed librarian who makes me question my stance on using the b-word. I dunno, maybe just this once. No, Leslie, fight it. FIGHT IT."
"Jerry filter!" "Jerry filter!" "Who's Jerry Filter?!"
"What a story! I felt like my HEART was white-water rafting!"
"Jerry Snurffle. Oak."
"It might be cold outside, but it's about to get warm all up in my jazz."
It's a mixed bag of news around the country--but at least there is some good news.
In Oklahoma, the Oklahoma Supreme Court has struck down draconian and useless anti-choice legislation:
OKLAHOMA CITY — Oklahoma laws requiring women seeking abortions to have an ultrasound image placed in front of them while they hear a description of the fetus and that ban off-label use of certain abortion-inducing drugs are unconstitutional, the state Supreme Court ruled Tuesday.
The state's highest court determined that lower court judges were right to halt the laws. In separate decisions, the Oklahoma Supreme Court said the laws, which received wide bipartisan support in the Legislature, violated a 1992 U.S. Supreme Court case.
[...]
Tony Lauinger, chairman of the anti-abortion group Oklahomans for Life, said he believes the state Supreme Court has misinterpreted the 1992 U.S. Supreme Court decision. He said the Oklahoma ultrasound measure provides a level of informed consent for women seeking abortions, something he said the federal decision permits.
Yes, please do go on Mr. Lauinger about how a near unanimous (one judge had to recuse herself) decision from your state supreme court justices is because they don't know what they're doing interpreting law.
Oklahoma already has legislation that is in effect that requires a person to receive state-mandated "counseling" generally designed to discourage abortion (and then have a 24 hour waiting period). Obviously that's not enough "informed consent" for the likes of Mr. Lauinger. It's also not enough for State Attorney General Scott Pruitt who is considering appealing to the Supreme Court (of the US).
---
In Michigan, legislators are using their end-of-session time to try and compete with the likes of Kansas and South Dakota in being hostile to autonomy:
The state Senate passed three bills on Thursday that would ban abortion coverage in state-based health insurance exchanges and all private insurance plans, and another bill that would allow employers and medical professionals to refuse to cover or provide health treatment to which they morally object. State lawmakers are also expected to pass a so-called omnibus bill on Thursday that would impose prohibitive building regulations on abortion clinics and ban the use of telemedicine to prescribe abortion medication.
That last bit of legislation, 5711, the one regarding the TRAP laws--I wrote about that in July. The bill was rushed though the senate committee with little public notice. It isn't just regulating floor space or supply closet size, it dictates:
Sec. 2836. (1) ALL fetal remains resulting from abortions shall be disposed of by means lawful for other dead bodies, including burial, cremation, or interment. Unless the mother has provided written consent for research on the fetal remains under section 2688, a physician who performs an abortion shall arrange for the final disposition of the fetal remains resulting from the abortion. If the fetal remains resulting from an abortion are disposed of by cremation, the fetal remains shall be incinerated separately from any other medical waste. However, this subsection does not prohibit the simultaneous cremation of fetal remains with products of conception or other fetal remains resulting from abortions.
(2) This section does not require a physician to discuss the final disposition of the fetal remains with the mother before performing the abortion, nor does it require a physician to obtain authorization from the mother for the final disposition of the fetal remains upon completion of the abortion.
This applies for less than 20 weeks gestation. It does not apply if a miscarriage occurs at home. As I said in July: All "fetal remains" are equal but some are more equal than others.
I still can't stop thinking about Tony. Wondering where he could be, who he is with, what is he thinking, is he thinking of me, and whether he'll ever return someday...
I need all the arms of all the couches for my nap. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
♪ Two-Legs, can you hear me? Two-Legs, are you near me? ♫
"If I did know, I wouldn't tell you."—Former President Bill Clinton, when asked whether his wife, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, will run for president in 2016.
This, in the year of our lord Jesus Jones two thousand and twelve. Tell us what's in your wife's head, mister!
That's fucking gross when it's a salesman who refuses to ask me a direct question and instead asks Iain, like he's my owner and can read my mind. When it's the Secretary of State being treated that way...OMG.
Senior White House and Justice Department officials are considering plans for legal action against Colorado and Washington that could undermine voter-approved initiatives to legalize the recreational use of marijuana in those states, according to several people familiar with the deliberations.
Even as marijuana legalization supporters are celebrating their victories in the two states, the Obama administration has been holding high-level meetings since the election to debate the response of federal law enforcement agencies to the decriminalization efforts.
I get it: Marijuana is still a controlled substance per federal law, and the administration can't just have states ignoring federal law whenever they don't like it, because Indiana would literally have factories filled with child laborers making bootstraps out of asbestos by the end of the year.
On the other hand, maybe there's a better option than high-level strategy meetings trying to figure out how to penalize states for legalizing weed without pissing off Obama's base—like, for example, using those states' new laws as a springboard to propose a national policy to decriminalize weed with the appropriate regulations (i.e. those similar to current alcohol regulations).
I know it's a wild idea, but maybe it's time to move FORWARD on marijuana. And, more importantly, on reforming the reprehensible "drug war" built around its illegality.
Come on, Obama administration. I bet if you really tried, you could get this shit together in time for the president to sign it into law next April 20th.
Here is your topic: Top Five Favorite Party Tricks. Either tricks you can do, or tricks you've seen other people do. Knotting a cherry stem with a tongue, the straw-paper spider who's made to dance with a drip of water, allllll the match-stick tricks, halving an apple with one's bare hands, etc. Go!
Please feel welcome to share stories about why your Top Five picks are what they are, though a straight-up list is fine, too. Please refrain from negatively auditing other people's lists, because judgment discourages participation.
Jane Abbott Lighty, left, and her partner of 35 years, Pete-e Petersen of West Seattle, hold the very first same-sex marriage license, signed for them by King County Executive Dow Constantine, as the King County Recorder's office starts to issue same-sex marriage licensing at 12:01 A.M. Thursday December 6, 2012. Lighty and Petersen will wed in a special ceremony at Benaroya Hall featuring the Seattle Men's Chorus on Sunday night. [Bettina Hansen/The Seattle Times]
Larry Duncan, 56, and Randy Shepherd, 48, apply for a marriage license in the King County Administration Building. Originally from Dallas, Texas, they told photographer Meryl Schenker they moved to Washington 7 years ago because it was more gay friendly. [Meryl Schenker/via]
Kelly Middleton, 24, and her partner Amanda Dollente, 29, embrace after they received their marriage license at the King County Administration Building on Thursday, December 6, 2012. [Joshua Trujillo/SeattlePI.com]
Kim Hinken, of Edgewater, MD, holds the marriage license she obtained Thursday in Anne Arundel County Circuit in Annapolis, MD, to marry her partner, Adrianne Eathorne. [Brian Witte/AP]
Congratulations, Washington and Maryland!!!
[Thanks to all the Shakers who sent in photo links. Please feel welcome and encouraged to share links to related photos in comments.]
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"Merry Congratuchristmas! ... Jingle bells! Jingle yay! Jingle good for you!"
