Steve Guttenberg FINALLY Does the Oft-Demanded, Eagerly-Awaited, and Long-Overdue Interview with CreditCards.com That We've All Been Waiting for and Complains about Obama's Vacations, Obviously

It's hard to say what my FAVORITE part of this interview is, because not only do we get some hot political commentary:

I voted for Obama, I love Obama, but I don't want to see Obama on "The View," I don't want to see him playing Frisbee... I believe that the president should be [at] his desk all day. I don't want to see him on vacation, I don't want to see him at Martha's Vineyard, I don't want to see Mrs. Obama in Spain. No, no, I do not want to see that because everybody's struggling. These CEOs shouldn't be taking all this money. No Rolls Royces. No private planes.
—which, like, I sort of get, but, no, the solution is not to suggest the person with arguably the most stressful job in the world never have any recuperative time so that bad, high-anxiety, no-sleep, super-tense decisions are made just to avoid the appearance of privilege, but instead eradicating that privilege by prioritizing the same opportunities for down-time to average workers—but also some world-class observations like:
I think ignorance is overlooked as a very, very powerful tool. It's like Mr. Magoo walking through a minefield. Sometimes it's great being Mr. Magoo.
—sure, definitely, perfect. I mean, honestly, my favorite thing is probably just that this interview exists at all, because Steve Guttenberg is promoting his new memoir called, of course because what the fuck else would it be called, The Guttenberg Bible.

Liss: GUTTENBERG! [sends link]

Deeks: Why the fuck is creditcards.com interviewing Steve Gutenberg?

Liss: Because he's a financial wizard.

Deeks: I can't wait for Cutlery World's interview with Judge Reinhold.

Liss: Do you think it'll be as good as Lawnmower Monthly's legendary profile of Don Rickles?

[H/T to @bendimiero.]

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BushQuotes!

Chapter 3, page 45: "In April, I sent a memo about the painting to my 'hardworking staff members.'"

I do not know why 'hardworking staff members' is in quotes. Is it a direct quote, i.e. the memo was literally addressed Dear Hardworking Staff Members? Is it sarcasm? The sort of obnoxious humor of a boss who lives for work quipping, "Half day today?" at you, if you have the unmitigated temerity to leave on time, instead of your usual two hours past when you get paid to be there?

I have no idea. This book is the worst.

[From George Bush's A Charge to Keep, gifted to me by Deeky, because he hates me. In the US, all people who plan to run for president write a shitty book. (Some are less shitty than others, by which I mean the Democrats' books.) A Charge to Keep was George W. Bush's shitty I-wanna-be-president book, published in 1999. I am blogging one random quote per page every day until I have either made my way through the book or lost it behind a couch.]

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Tweet of the Day


My reply:


Have at it in comments.

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Daily Dose of Cute

I've written before about how all five furry residents of Shakes Manor want to be wherever we are at all times. Below is a video from a recent Saturday, while Iain was out mowing the lawn, and I was doing a little work in the living room.


Video Description: Dudley is standing beside the couch, staring off into space. "Dudley," I say, and click my tongue at him. He looks at me. "What are you up to? Are you being a good boy?" His ears twitch. I pan to the left, where Sophie is sitting on the arm of the couch right beside me. "What about you, Sophie?" I click at her. "Sophs!" I say in the Sophie voice. I pan back to the right. Dudley looks at me. "Hi, Dudz." Back to Sophs, and the Sophie voice. "Sophs! What are you up to, huh?" Click click. I pan to the right past Dudley, where Matilda is sitting between my feet. "What about you, Matilda? Huh?" Click click. She meows at me. "Yeah?" I pan even further right, where Olivia is sitting on the back of the couch next to my shoulder. "What about you, Livsies?" I make kissy noises at her. "Are you being good, Livs?" I pan back to the left, where Zelda is sitting on the loveseat. "How about you, Zels? Zellzebelle! My Zelly Belly." Dudley walks into frame and starts to climb up on the couch beside me to the right. "Aww, Dudley's gonna join us on the couch. Go on, sit down, monster." He curls himself up in between the pillows. "Oh, what a good boy!" I pan around: Zelda, Matilda, Zelda, Dudley, Olivia, Sophie, Matilda. A bunch of sleepy beasts. The End.

For those who love and request images of inter-species cuddling, here are a few recent snaps for you...

image of Zelda, Matilda, and Dudley all stretched out in a row on the sofa
Don't mind me; I'll just sit on the floor.

Matilda on the arm of the couch, snuggling up next to Dudley
Matilda and Dudley.

Zelda and Olivia curled up close to one another
Zelda and Olivia.

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Wednesday Blogaround

This blogaround brought to you by beautiful green vines.

Recommended Reading:

Tami: No Disrespect [Content Note: The post at this link contains discussion of policing black women's behavior at the intersection of racism and misogyny.]

Sneha: A Problem-and-Solution Mismatch: Son Preference and Sex-Selective Abortion Bans

Maria: Venture Capitalist Mitt Romney Outspends All Contenders to Acquire Republican Presidential Nomination

Danielle: Feeling Is Believing: Why Obama's Hair Matters

Lisa: Katherine Cross: Speaking Out for Reproductive Freedom, 2012

Jeanette: The HAES® Files: "Eat Your Vegetables—News at Eleven"—Why Common Sense Health Advice Makes Bad Television [Content Note: The post at this link contains discussion of various weight loss industry fuckery.]

Jos: A Sea Change in Transgender Rights [Content Note: The post at this link includes discussion of transphobic prejudice and violence.]

Andy: Indiana Church Gives Child Standing Ovation for Singing 'No Homos Gonna Make It to Heaven [Content Note: The video contained at this link contains homophobia and what I personally regard to be child abuse.]

Sean: Quantum Mechanics When You Close Your Eyes

Jorge: Invisible Me

Jay Smooth: Mitt Romney Scares the Crap Out of Me [video]

Leave your links and recommendations in comments...

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Two-Minute Nostalgia Sublime



Patrice Rushen: "Forget Me Nots"

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Generally Awful

image of Mitt Romney laughing at a campaign event, with a dude giving the evil eye right behind him, to which I have added a dialogue bubble reading: 'There's a surly fellow in a red tie giving you a death stare right behind you, sir.' Ha ha! Good one! You almost got me! Ha ha!

If you are still maintaining maximum enthusiasm for the TOTALLY EXCITING and VERY AWESOME and HOLY SHIT ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME THIS WILL DECIDE THE COURSE OF OUR NATION AND WE'RE STILL TALKING ABOUT BIRTH CERTIFICATES OMFG election, please check this box: □

That Guy: Romney's Birth Certificate Evokes His Father's Controversy. That controversy being that his father, who once tried to run for president, was born in Mexico. (Oh noes!) To US citizens. (Phew!) Who lived in a Mormon polygamist commune. (Um.) Never mind all that because Donald Trump says Obama is Kenyan!

This Guy: President Obama Causes Outrage with Reference to 'Polish Death Camp'. Whoooooooops! It turns out that Poles don't consider "Polish Death Camp" and "Nazi Death Camp in German-Occupied Poland" synonymous terms. Go figure. So touchy those Poles! (That is sarcasm, in case it wasn't evident.) The White House says the President "misspoke," which he certainly did but in a very inflammatory way, and I'm sure a formal apology will be forthcoming.

That Guy: Mitt Romney Wants the Biggest Military Ever, Regardless of Cost. Perfect.

Poll Money! GOP Groups Plan Record $1 Billion Blitz. Just normal election stuff in the very healthy democracy we've got here in the old US of A.

Finally! Care of BuzzFeed, here's a fun screencap from Mitt Romney's new "Mittstagram" app:

screencap from mobile app with America misspelled as 'Amercia'

Whooooooooooops that is not the correct spelling of "America." I am Queen Typo of Keyboardia, so I can sympathize, BUT on the OTHER HAND, I am pretty sure that if I were a candidate running to be PRESIDENT of a COUNTRY, I would make sure to tell the team in charge of the supercool phone app I released to show how hip I am that PRIORITY NUMBER ONE is spelling the name of that country correctly.

Talk about these things! Or don't. Whatever makes you happy. Life is short.

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Random Nerd Nostalgia: The Marketing Saga Begins

In honor of yesterday's Question of the Day:

STarWarsMarketing

[Description: Headline says "A Galaxy of Star Wars Treasures" over drawings of characters from Episode IV: A New Hope wearing or holding various pieces of Star Wars Related Merchandise.C-3PO waggles his fingers at R2, saying "You're trying my patience R2! You can't wear a backpack. You haven't got a back!" R-2 is, nonetheless, wearing a backpack. Luke is wearing a t-shirt and has his arm around Leia; Han Solo, wearing a blue Star Wars baseball cap and hanging with Chewbacca, says to Luke: "Hey kid, I like your taste in t-shirts!" Obi-Wan, holding a lightsabre, taps the shoulder of a stormtrooper who is holding a big Star Wars poster. There is an order form at the bottom.]

Scanned from Thor #270, April 1978.

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This is so the worst thing you're going to read all day.

[Content Note: Misogyny; gender essentialism; heterocentrism.]

Tracy McMillan: Why You're Still Not Married.

I hate every single thing about this article. In fact, I hate it so much, I almost don't want to give HuffPo the traffic for it, since piquing feminist ire seems to be the point.

But I do want to use this piece to point out a very insidious habit of antifeminist writers: The old "You know there's a voice in the back of your head telling you I'm right" chestnut.

Yeah. That "voice" is the Patriarchy. That "voice" is the collection of Patriarchal narratives implanted in women's psyches since birth to undermine our agency and confidence and independence, and to entrain us to self-blame.

Appeals to that voice are gross, woman-hating garbage. And when I see another female writer making those appeals—come on, you know I'm right—it makes me angry and it makes me sad, because that bellicose admonishment is masking a deep insecurity, a resignation. I give up. I give in. You can, too.

It's just so much easier to go along with it all, especially if you have company.

[H/T to @artsynomad.]

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Number of the Day

75.7%: The percentage of US workers between the ages of 25 and 54 who have jobs. That is not good.

The proportion of Americans in their prime working years who have jobs is smaller than it has been at any time in the 23 years before the recession, according to federal statistics, reflecting the profound and lasting effects that the downturn has had on the nation’s economic prospects.

By this measure, the jobs situation has improved little in recent years. The percentage of workers between the ages of 25 and 54 who have jobs now stands at 75.7 percent, just a percentage point over what it was at the downturn's worst, according to federal statistics.

Before the recession the proportion hovered at 80 percent.

While the unemployment rate may be the most closely watched gauge of the economy in the presidential campaign, this measure of prime-age workers captures more of the ongoing turbulence in the job market. It reflects "missing workers" who have stopped looking for work and aren’t included in the unemployment rate.

During their prime years, Americans are supposed to be building careers and wealth to prepare for their retirement. Instead, as the indicator reveals, huge numbers are on the sidelines.

"What it shows is that we are still near the bottom of a very big hole that opened in the recession," said Heidi Shierholz, an economist at the Economic Policy Institute, a left-leaning think tank.
This underlines the need for investment in a robust social safety net. A nation can't have an entire generation of people unable to build wealth to prepare for retirement—and any financial bumps in the road along the way—and abdicate all accountability for meeting basic needs. Not unless that nation wants to come to its knees.

This situation also (further) exposes (again) the abject cruelty of the bootstraps narrative. When employment becomes a game of musical chairs, even among the traditionally privileged, the willingness to work hard and be "self-reliant" doesn't mean shit without a heaping dose of luck.

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Open Thread

image of breaching humpback whale

Hosted by a humpback whale.

[Photo by Coy Aune.]

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Question of the Day

You have been tasked with casting a reboot (ugh) of Star Wars: Episode IV, and you have to cast the roles of: Leia, Luke, Han, Chewie, Obi-Wan, Vader, and Grand Moff Tarkin. You are not bound by gender, i.e. you can switch Luke to Luka, and you are not required to cast them as any particular race, but bear in mind that Leia and Luke are still twins, so they would (most likely) resemble each other. Wookies can be reimagined as you like, if you like.

So: Who do you cast?

Leia: Freida Pinto.

Prince Luke: Kunal Nayyar.

Han Solo, Prince Luke's love interest: Josh Holloway.

Chewie, with Wookies reimagined as humany: Jorge Garcia.

Obi-Wan: Alfre Woodard.

Vader: Irrfan Khan.

Grand Moff Tarkin: Andy Serkis.

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Discussion Thread: Feminist/Womanist 101 Books

One of the most frequent questions I get via email is about good print resources for feminist/womanist 101. So: What books, essays, anthologies, novels, magazines would you recommended to a feminist/womanist noob?

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Photo of the Day

image of fireworks exploding against a night sky over the Golden Gate Bridge
Fireworks explode over the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, California, on May 27, 2012, on which the bridge celebrated its 75th anniversary. The 1.7-mile steel suspension bridge, one of the modern Wonders of the World, opened to traffic on May 27, 1937. [Getty Images]

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Quote of the Day

"The female experience is different from that of the male, and if, as a male writer, you cannot accept that basic premise, then you will never, ever, be able to write women well."Greg Rucka.

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Today in Totally Not Terrorism

[Content Note: Anti-choice terrorism.]

Annie-Rose at Think Progress: New Orleans Women's Clinic Becomes Latest Target of Arson Attacks.

A New Orleans women’s health organization was destroyed last week by an unknown arsonist, becoming the latest target of attacks on women’s health clinics in the south.

The organization, Women With A Vision, was likely singled out because it offers AIDS prevention help, HIV testing, and substance abuse assistance to sex workers, transgender women, poor women, and women of color. The clinic also does community outreach and education on those issues. Like two incidents in Georgia last week, no one was injured in the fire, but the clinic lost a good share of its resources.

...The New Orleans fire department is still looking into the fires at Women With A Vision, but witnesses reported seeing a man run from the building where the fire was set.
There is more at the link about the extent of the physical damage done and how you can help.

Have I mentioned once or twice or three million times that this is fucking terrorism? Have I mentioned that maybe our president should say something about it?

It is. He should.

This flagrant, shameless campaign of intimidation, harassment, threats and acts of violence against healthcare providers who offer services to women and other people with uteri, and the spaces in which they offer them, is not just a terrorist movement in defense of an inherently violent ideology, but it is a national referendum on whether this country cares about women et. al., bodily autonomy, and agency.

The silence from our alleged allies speaks volumes.

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Fatsronauts 101

Fatsronauts 101 is a series in which I address assumptions and stereotypes about fat people that treat us as a monolith and are used to dehumanize and marginalize us. If there is a stereotype you'd like me to address, email me.

[Content Note: Fat bias; dehumanization.]

#3: Fat people are jolly/mean, and fat people are shy/loud.

These are a whole bunch of temperamental stereotypes about fat people, but these are probably the most common—and let us note the immediate irony that they can be conveniently grouped into two dichotomous pairs!

Fat people are jolly! Except for how we're all mean. And fat people are shy! Except for how we're all so loud and obnoxious.

How can all of these conflicting stereotypes about fat people be true?! Spoiler Alert: None of them are!

Obviously, not all fat people are jolly, nor are all fat people mean, and not all fat people are shy, nor are all fat people loud. Like any sweeping generalization made about any group, these are just garbage observations offered by people who attempt to justify their biases with dehumanizing monolithic narratives. Whoooops your bigotry!

Fat people, being actual human beings and all, experience a spectrum of emotions and have individual complex personalities, most of which can't be contained in a single reductive adjective.

That said, it's informative to examine exactly why these particular stereotypes are so ubiquitous.

The Jolly Fatty. The Jolly Fatty is a very recognizable stereotype, especially but not uniquely in the West. Children in many cultures are introduced to the Jolly Fatty in the form of a gentleman you may have heard of named Santa Claus, aka Father Christmas, aka St. Nick—red-cheeked and perpetually grinning, his big round belly jiggling as he "ho-ho-ho"s his way into their hearts.

The Jolly Fatty is also a staple in comedic duos (Laurel & Hardy, Abbott & Costello), trios (The Three Stooges), and troupes (Chris Farley, Horatio Sanz, Kenan Thompson, et. al. on SNL; John Candy on SCTV). Generally, the Jolly Fatty in comedic groups has been a male stereotype, owing primarily to the misogynist stereotype that women aren't funny, full-stop. But as female comedic groups emerge, the Jolly Fatty Female Edition emerges, too, e.g. Melissa McCarthy in Bridesmaids and Phyllis Smith on The Office.

Partly, the Jolly Fatty exists because it's fun to laugh at fat people just because we're fat. Partly, it exists because it's fun/amazing to see fat people engaging in exuberant activities that we're allegedly unable to do. Chris Farley was a master at physical comedy, and the legendary Chippendales SNL sketch with Patrick Swayze is a classic example of being exhorted to laugh at the fatness of, but also the unexpected physical prowess of, a Jolly Fatty. Kevin James routinely plays the hilariously gravity-defying fat guy. After watching Paul Blart, I observed: "[The most depressing thing about the film is] that Kevin James is a fat guy who can move! He can run and jump and do somersaults, and he was kick. ass. on that Segway—had it doing all kinds of tricks. It was so sad that the movie was so rife with fat-hating stereotypes, because Kevin James himself actually defies so many of them!" The Jolly Fatty isn't meant to break down stereotypes, though: The Jolly Fatty is meant to play to them for laughs.

And partly, the Jolly Fatty exists because real, live, actual fat people who aren't created by or dependent on the media use a façade of cheeriness as a self-defense mechanism.

That's not to say there are not fat people who are naturally happy. I'm dispositionally disposed to contentment myself. But that is a very different thing from a consciously constructed veneer of impenetrable ebullience worn like armor into a hostile world. I know the difference—because I have worn that armor myself.

It is terribly easy to slip into the always-accessible costume of the Jolly Fatty, because people are nicer to the Jolly Fatty than to a real, complex, vulnerable fat human being. I've said before that being publicly, shamelessly, unshakably fat and happy is an act of both will and bravery—and, the truth is, being publicly, shamelessly, unshakably fat and not-happy about things other than your fatness is even harder.

The thing is, affecting the Jolly Fatty is most useful/necessary around people who are fat-haters, between whom and ourselves fat people feel obliged to construct a deflective artifice of self-protection off of which can bounce the judgment and bullying central to fat hatred.

It's not a coincidence that it's fat-haters who most readily pronounce all fat people to be jolly. It's because their bigotry results in inauthentic interactions with fat people.

The Mean Fatty. It's also not a coincidence that it's fat-haters who are most likely to declare all fat people to be mean. The fact is, if you go around treating fat people like shit, it's no wonder most of us aren't bundles of joy in your presence.

The Mean Fatty is similarly a familiar comedic staple. John Belushi and Jon Lovitz generally played Mean Fatties on SNL—or some variation of mean, e.g. grumpy, acerbic, bitter. Comedic foils and villains are often rotund—Pee-Wee Herman's nemesis Francis is an iconic over-indulged, gluttonous, greedy Mean Fatty. The Coen Brothers also love a good Mean Fatty, and Disney routinely associates fat with villainous.

The Mean Fatty is also a more dramatic staple, showing up especially in dramatic fare for kids as a bully who makes like difficult for the thin protagonist—the classic ginger-haired, freckle-faced, chubby bully in his striped brown shirt, hurling snowballs or snarling epithets with a lisp at our long-suffering hero.

Partly, the Mean Fatty exists because it's fun to hate fat people just because we're fat. Partly, it exists because it reinforces—and validates—preexisting prejudices against fat people. It's okay to hate them; look, they're all nasty, anyway.

And partly, the Mean Fatty exists because there are real, live, actual fat people who are "mean" specifically around their fatness. And by "mean," I mean defensive.

Which, of course, is meant to be A Terrible Thing—especially since we all know that fat people are supposed to be jolly! Fat people are supposed to make preemptive self-deprecating jokes about our own fat to diffuse the awkward situation of your quietly judging us! We're not supposed to get all testy about being quietly (or not-so-quietly) judged by people who have decided to make our bodies their business! GEEZ! THE NERVE OF THOSE MEAN FATTIES!

You know the old saying that everything looks like a nail when you're holding a hammer? Well, maybe every fatty looks mean when you're a fat-hater.

The Shy Fatty/The Loud Fatty. I'll take these two together. These are variations on the same stereotypes about members of all marginalized groups, which pivot around an invisible centerpoint of perfection in which the marginalized person is not too quiet/compliant/disengaged from activism around hir identity, but is also not too loud/defiant/engaged with activism around hir identity.

To fail to take a position is too quiet. To take a position in opposition to the narratives, stereotypes, and people which oppress us is to be too loud.

Basically: We are meant to have opinions, but only those which echo the opinions of our oppressors.

(See how that works?)

The Shy Fatty and Loud Fatty function in tandem as a way for people with thin privilege to deflect blame for fat hatred back onto fat people: Shy Fatties don't speak up and demand better treatment. Loud Fatties are always shoving their fat in people's faces and making them resentful of fat. Two extremes who fail to find the perfect balance in which fat people command respect in precisely the right tone.

The Shy Fatty and Loud Fatty stereotypes also exist partly because there are a lot of shy fat people whose shyness is inextricably linked with their fatness, who chose to withdraw and be as invisible as possible in an attempt to avoid attention on their transgressive bodies, and because there are a lot of loud fat people whose loudness is inextricably linked with their fatness, who choose to be boisterous and as visible as possible in a rejection of the cultural pressure to take up less space—to hunch, to crouch, to fold, to squeeze, to be unseen.

These stereotypes, when reflected in actual fat people, are reactions to fat hatred. And thus are they seen primarily by people who routinely express fat hatred and/or unexamined thin privilege.

It's a self-reinforcing cycle of bullshit, which is broken by creating spaces in which fat people can express without fear of shame, hatred, or retribution the full spectrum of their emotional lives.

Presuming all fat people are all one thing—besides, ya know, deserving of respect—is failing to provide that sort of space.

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Daily Dose of Cute

image of Dudley the Greyhound with his head lying on a pillow and his tongue hanging out

This may be my favorite picture I've ever taken of Dudley.

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History at Indy

For the first time ever, there was an all-female team at the Indy 500 this weekend:

Katherine Legge became the first driver to bring an all-woman team to the Indy 500 on Sunday. Legge, a rookie from England, is the ninth female racer to qualify for the Indy 500. Her all-woman crew made headlines for being the first in the history of the Indy 500.

Before the race, Legge told CNN that she wants to inspire girls to pursue their dreams, saying she hopes to inspire girls "to follow what they want to be. And they have to pursue that with 110 percent knowledge that they can get there if they really, really want to." During the race, she wore the Girl Scouts logo on her helmet. She said she was racing as a representative for science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM).

Two other women qualified for the Indy 500 this year - Simona de Silvestro of Switzerland and Ana Beatriz of Brazil.
I love this quote from Legge, last week: "[Woman drivers are] not a novelty anymore. We're just drivers. … The car doesn't know whether you're male or female."

(Note the headline on that second article: "IndyCar driver Katherine Legge leaves gender in rearview." LOL. Uh-huh. Because when women fail, it's because they're women. And when women achieve, it's because they've abandoned gender.)

Congrats, and thank you, Katherine Legge!

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Film Corner!

promotional image for Men in Black 3 featuring Josh Brolin, Will Smith, and Tommy Lee Jones

So, this weekend, Iain and I saw Men in Black 3, about which neither one of us was super excited. Both of us had liked, but not loved, the first two films, and we were a bit dubious that the franchise would hold up 15 years later. Basically, we had low expectations going in, but were hopeful.

Well! It was very good!

The one big problem with the film is that it does not pass the Bechdel Test, and, in the year of our lord Jesus Jones two thousand and twelve, that is truly pathetic. You've got Emma Thompson in your film and you can't bother to do anything interesting with her, or even have her speak to another female person? Come on.

But there's a lot to recommend, too.

It was nice to see Will Smith again, after a four-year hiatus from films following a period where he was overexposed and not even in service to decent flicks. (More like Oy Robot, amirite?) Welcome back, Will Smith! I like you!

Tommy Lee Jones. 'Nuff said.

Josh Brolin does a ridiculously awesome impression of Tommy Lee Jones. It's unusual for a dramatic actor to be known as a good impressionist, right? But Josh Brolin did a spot-on Mondo Fucko in W, and he does an even better TLJ in MIB3. It's really impressive.

Jemaine Clement (Flight of the Conchords) is swell as the baddie, Boris. The special effects around Boris are also very nifty, and I didn't feel as though I've seen them a million times before.

Mostly, though, I just loved the story (especially the Grif bits). I am a sucker for any kind of time travel stuff, but beyond that: Iain and I were thinking and talking about the story a lot afterwards; we both found it just so unexpectedly moving. Granted, both of us have actively heat-seeking cockles, but even granting our dispositions toward mush, there was just a deep sweetness that is far too rare.

Anyway! Recommended.

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