With several party leaders facing recalls, Wisconsin Republicans have decided to introduce a constitutional amendment that would make it more difficult for voters to recall elected officials.
Oh, I see what you're doing there!
TrueFact (TM): Tiddlywinks has been constitutionally prohibited in Wisconsin since shortly after Philip La Follete (son of then-Governor Bob La Follette) suffered a devastating schoolyard defeat in 1904.
LOL FOREVER
More News from the Conservative Legislation Lab
[Content Note: Guns.]
My fellow Hoosier, Shaker Thunderbird, sends along this tops piece of news with the note, "Nice to see the Indiana legislature has its priorities in order *eyeroll*": Indiana sets sight on having official state rifle.
Indiana soon will have an official state rifle to go along with the state tree, state stone and state flower.The other two are Utah and Arizona.
The Indiana House voted 78-2 on Tuesday to declare the Grouseland the state's official rifle. It is one of only six remaining long rifles made by famed Hoosier gunsmith John Small in the early 1800s.
The measure, earlier approved 48-2 by the Senate and headed to Gov. Mitch Daniels, makes Indiana only the third state with an official gun.
I can't even begin to put into words how truly thrilled I am to live in a state in which declaring a state rifle, teaching creationism, union-busting, and defunding women's healthcare are the legislative priorities.
Primarily Endless
No one dropped out?! Are you fucking kidding me?! NO ONE?! Whut. OH MY GOD. This primary is my big-ass rock and I am Sisyphus, doomed to Photoshop these four colossal beasts of bigotry up a hill only to have my magic wand tool roll down again. (That definitely makes sense.)
Fuck you, Mitt Romney! You don't deserve to win! I hope this primary goes to an open convention and everyone calls you Mr. Poopypants Who Couldn't Close the Deal and then chooses Zombie Ronald Reagan as the nominee, and then alllllll the conservative heads explode when Zombie Ronald Reagan immediately proposes raising taxes, and then Zombie Ronald Reagan says, "Obama seems like a nice enough Republican; I'mma vote for him!" then disappears in a plume of sulfurous smoke, leaving you a one-man party with only your own vote against a nation who now considers Barack Obama its rightwing and promptly elects Representative Barbara Lee its new president.
True Fact: The above scenario has as much chance of actually happening as Newt Gingrich has of winning the nomination, and a slightly better chance of actually happening than Ron Paul winning the nomination.
* * *
I can't even fucking believe the numbers of people who are voting for Rick Santorum. It's terrifying. It's like I went to sleep one night and woke up in one of Margaret Atwood's nightmares.
Actual Text Exchange Between Deeks and Me Last Night as We Watched the Returns Come In:
Deeks: OMG this election.
Liss: I know. I KNOW.
Deeks: We all ARE FUCKED.
Liss: At this point, I am honestly just hoping I die before the terrifying economic depression/global thermonuclear war/climate catastrophe/antibacterially-resistant biological nightmare comes.
Deeks: Good plan.
ANYWAY! Here are the garbage results from SUPER TUESDAY!
Massachusetts: Romney
Ohio: Romney
Idaho: Romney
Virginia: Romney
Vermont: Romney
Alaska: Romney
Tennessee: Santorum
North Dakota: Santorum
Oklahoma: Santorum
Georgia: Gingrich
What you'll notice about those results is that Romney is not winning the South. In Virginia, both Santorum and Gingrich failed to make the ballot in time, so Romney won, but Ron Paul took 40% of the vote. Coming up later this month are primaries in Alabama, Mississippi, Missouri, and Louisiana—and if Romney can't seal the deal in any of those states, the possibility of a brokered convention will inch closer to a reality.
Next Stop: Kansas!
Talk about these things! Or don't. Whatever makes you happy. Life is short.
BushQuotes!
Reflections, Page xi: "I told the editor of this book that I was worried because there was no chapter that described what all of us love most about our boss—because he is too modest to describe his thoughtfulness and the genuine and unique way he relates to people."—Karen Hughes.
But not too modest to give a prologue in his book to one of his employees to describe how modest he is about his awesomeness.
Question of the Day
As a follow-up to yesterday's QotD...
To what answerable question would you like a different answer from the universe?
Too many. But, for now, I'll go with: "Are these really the only people with a realistic chance at the US presidency this year?"
SUUUUUUUPER TUUUUUUUESDAY Open Thread
(True Fact: That is the actual back of Newt Gingrich's actual head—because I have more integrity in my terrible Photoshopping than all of these candidates put together.)
WHO WILL GOBBLE THE MOST
(Full Disclosure: No I am not.)
Please use this thread for all your primary discussin' needs.
Photo of the Day
William House of Huntsville, Alabama, waits for Republican presidential candidate and former House Speaker Newt Gingrich to arrive during a campaign stop at the US Space and Rocket Center, Tuesday, March 6, 2012, in Huntsville. [AP Photo]It is possible that William House of Huntsville, Alabama is waiting to see Newt Gingrich because he, Mr. House I mean, is a conservative who loves Newt Gingrich and everything for which he, Newt Gingrich I mean, stands. Or it is possible that William House of Huntsville, Alabama is waiting to see Newt Gingrich because he is a progressive who wants to give Gingrich a piece of his mind, or because he is a moderate and, hey, free candidate!
The point is, I don't know why William House of Huntsville, Alabama is hanging out at the US Space and Rocket Center in his patriotic top hat and tie and suspenders, and I will make no judgments.
All I know is that he is a patriot with extraordinary fashion sense who wants to show some goddamn spirit on Super Tuesday and loves the democratic process!
And, in that, we are kindred spirits.
Terrible and Amazing Story of a Woman Who Saved Her Kids & Herself During the Tornadoes in Indiana
[Content Note: Serious injury.]
Among the extreme weather happening in many parts of the US right now, we're getting tornadoes all over Indiana. The tornado warning sirens have gone off in town several times today, but luckily nothing serious has materialized. In southern Indiana, Henryville was not so fortunate. Stephanie Decker was home with her two children when two tornadoes within a matter of minutes of one another leveled their home. This is the awesome, in the very real sense of the world, story of how she saved them and managed to survive.
Drew Douglas, a white male reporter, walking near utterly flattened home: Here's all that remains of the Deckers' home, after the two tornadoes whipped through Henryville. Just before the devastation struck, Stephanie Decker put herself on the line for her kids. She grabbed a large comforter and wrapped them inside and then rested herself on top of them to shield them from all the debris.
Stephanie Decker, a 37-year-old white woman, from a hospital bed: I was reaching around holding them and trying to keep everything away from them, so it didn't hit them.
Douglas, in voiceover, over images of the wreckage of the Deckers' home (which underlie his voiceovers throughout): The wreckage that piled on Stephanie broke seven of her ribs and almost completely severed both of her legs.
Decker, from hospital bed: I had two steel beams on my legs, and I couldn't—I couldn't move. I was stuck.
Douglas, in voiceover: Decker told her eight-year-old son Dominic to make sure the coast was clear before getting help. Stephanie's fear was confirmed: A second twister was headed right for her family.
Decker, from hospital bed: And they're screaming, "Mommy, I can't live without you. I don't wanna die. Please don't let me die."
Douglas, in voiceover: Despite being pinned down by the steel beams, Decker covered her two children a second time with the comforter. After two tornadoes, just minutes apart, leveled their home, Dominic and five-year-old Reese didn't suffer so much as a scratch.
Joe Decker, Stephanie's husband, a white man, at her hospital bed side, choked up: Anybody that knows her has no doubt that's what she'd do.
Douglas, in voiceover: Unable to remove the heavy debris lying on top of their badly injured mother, Decker's young son went for help. The phone lines were down, so Stephanie used her cell phone for something else.
Decker, from hospital bed: And then I—I took my phone and I made a video to my husband [chokes up, looks at her husband] telling him I love him…and my children that I love them.
Douglas, in voiceover: After what seemed like a lifetime, a neighbor and four others finally arrived for the thirty-seven-year-old mother writhing in pain.
Decker, from hospital bed: He came down and I looked at him and I said, "I'm dying—you've got to save me!"
Douglas, in voiceover: Tourniquets were made to prevent her from bleeding to death. She was eventually taken to the University of Louisville Hospital, where she continues to recover. Both of her legs—casualties from the massive storm.
Decker: But if I can make it through that, I can live through anything.
Number of the Day
70%: The percentage of students "involved in school-related arrests or referred to law enforcement [who are] Hispanic or black," according to "the Civil Rights Data Collection's 2009-10 statistics from 72,000 schools in 7,000 districts, serving about 85 percent of the nation's students," despite the fact that "black and Hispanic students [constitute only] 44 percent of the students in the survey."
That is an alarming disparity. Or should be, to anyone who has a functional sense of decency.
At some point, we're going to need to stop dismissing as tinfoil-hat conspiracy theorizing observations about the public school system serving as a de facto subsidiary of the for-profit prison system, and have a serious national discussion about this deeply entrenched racist fuckery.
I strongly encourage you to read the entire article, which illuminates additional disparities.
Promoted from Comments
Because Shakers are awesome, I frequently read comments that deserve wider attention, so I'm starting a series called Promoted from Comments.
Two Things:
1. I will seek permission in comments or via email before posting comments to the main page, and no one should ever feel obliged to say yes or feel like they have to offer or have any specific reason for saying no. "I don't want to" is a legitimate reason.
2. Please don't begin "nominating" comments for promotion. I don't want this series to end up making people feel bad because their comment gets nominated and I don't want to post it for whatever reason. Well-intentioned nominations could also feel like peer pressure to say yes if asked. Just "Like" comments that you enjoy, as always, to show your support for any individual comment.
Anyway! Here is the inaugural promoted comment, care of Shaker Ana Mardoll:
I ended up yelling at Husband in the car the other night about this, with regards to birth control. Husband said, "You can't expect him to be controversial in the middle of an election." I said, in all caps:Indeed.
NINETY-EIGHT PERCENT OF WOMEN IN THIS COUNTRY HAVE USED BIRTH CONTROL.
THAT'S FIFTY PERCENT OF THE VOTING BLOCK.
MOST OF THOSE WOMEN USED BIRTH CONTROL WITH AN APPROVING PARTNER.
SO THAT'S ANOTHER, WHAT, THIRTY PERCENT?
EIGHTY PERCENT -- EIGHT-ZERO PERCENT -- OF AMERICANS APPROVE OF BIRTH CONTROL.
IF HE CAN'T COME OUT IN SUPPORT OF THAT, HE CAN'T COME OUT IN SUPPORT OF **PUPPIES**.
BIRTH CONTROL IS LITERALLY MORE SUPPORTED IN AMERICA THAN PUPPIES.
Husband blinked a few times and said he hadn't thought of it that way before. I just wish someone would transmit that message to my president.
Daily Dose of Cute
Auntie Eastsidekate and Auntie Westsidebecca and Cousin Miss A recently sent Dudley and Zelda a present, which they asked me to open for them with my enviable opposable thumbery. I was happy to comply, and the dogs were thrilled to be gifted a plushy tree-trunk filled with three squeaky plushy chipmunks! (True Fact: Rory the Spud has the exact same toy.)
Zelda immediately removed all the chipmunks and began squeaking them with vigorous enthusiasm!
Dudz immediately took possession of the chipmunks' tree to use as a pillow, because getting presents is exhausting.
Later, the two dogs were in the office, both of them happily squeaking away, with a chipmunk apiece.
Video Description: The two monsters lie on their monster beds in my office, squeaking their chipmunks. I pan from Dudley to Zelly. Chew chew chew. I pan back. Chew chew chew. "Dudley, do you like your new toy?" I ask him. Chew chew chew. I pan to Zelly. "What about you, Zelda?" Chew chew chew. "Good puppies!" I say. I start to pan back to Dudz, but Zelly looks at me and wags her tail. I pan back to her. "Good puppy?" She looks at Dudley. I pan to him. He grabs his chipmunk, which has fallen onto the floor and returns it to his bed. Fin.
Zelly's favorite new game is to grab one of the chipmunks by the head and offer us its tail, so we can grab it for CHIPMUNK TUG-O-WAR! Zelly is the undefeated champion.
Obama Presser
President Obama is holding a press conference in which he's answering questions about the Iranian nuclear program, Syrian unrest, and our alliance with Israel, among other things. You can watch it live here or here.
He is making me very nervous talking about how he has deeply considered the costs of taking military action, even though he's saying that's why we must take a "cautious" and "sober" approach to the problem, because he keeps also saying "we always cooperate with Israel" and that we're going to "maintain that security commitment."
BushQuotes!
Forward, Page x: "I thank my attorney, Terri Lacy, for guiding the project from start to finish."
It's getting good now!
A Ponderment
Do you think anyone has ever mentioned to Alanis Morissette that the examples of irony used in her song are not, in fact, ironic? I bet no one ever has. We should definitely mention it to her.
Primarily SUPER!
[Content Note: Reference to violence.]
It's SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPER TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUESDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And you know what that means! Lots and lots and lots of primaries, most of which will be won by the least barfiest of the candidates, so CONGRATULATIONS IN ADVANCE, Mitt Romney!
The FUNNEST THING about Super Tuesday is the concession speeches! WHO WILL CONCESS TONITE?! THAT IS THE QUESTION!!! Will Rick Santorum lose enough that he throws in the vestment?! Will Newt Gingrich win Georgia and keep spending all of Sheldon Adelson's money?! Will Ron Paul find a jacket that fits?! THE MYSTERIES OF SUPER TUESDAY WILL ALL BE ANSWERED TONIGHT!
There isn't any BIG NEWS today, and, let's face it, even if there were, who cares. By this point, we know everything there is to know about this collection of gross nincompoops, and reading about Mitt Romney's plan to starve poor children even harder to teach them about bootstraps or exploring Ron Paul's theories on how social justice is a totes bonerkiller isn't going to do anything but convince all of us even more, if that even remains a practical possibility, that none of these epic dipfucks should be elected to the student council at the Ayn Rand Vocational School for Libertarian Metallurgists, no less to the presidency of a global superpower.
So, instead, here is my Handy Voter Guide that synthesizes all the important need-to-know information about each candidate as tens of dozens of primary voters all across the nation head to the polls today:
Mitt Romney: Unprincipled baby.
Rick Santorum: Vile bigot.
Newt Gingrich: Bloviating demon.
Ron Paul: Gold-plated jerk.
I hope you have been duly edified by my well-researched and very factual voter guide for SUPER TUESDAY!!!
Nate Silver has your Guide to Super Tuesday Possibilities here.
And Richard Adams' live coverage, which, of course, is always a thing of beauty, is here.
I know some of you are VERY CONCERNED that Super Tuesday might effectively bring to an end this primary contest (ha ha it has been fun pretending someone other than Mitt Romney might win, HASN'T IT?!), which will mean the end of these definitely very brilliant daily collations of electoral news (boooooooooo!), but FEAR NOT, intrepid newshounds! These works of blogging art will continue right through to the general election (yayyyyyyyy!), unless I cut my own head off with a Hillary 2008 campaign button first!
Talk about these things! Or don't. Whatever makes you happy. Life is short.
I Write Letters
Dear NPR,
I greatly enjoyed listening to David Brooks and E.J. Dionne's March 2nd discussion of President Obama's communication skills. Speaking of which, would you consider replacing your Friday political roundtable with the audio track from the Discover Channel's Puppy Bowl? If I wanted to hear older white men interminably ramble about things they obviously know nothing about, I never would have left my job in higher education.
Kisses,
Katie
Two Facts
1. Ann Romney, wife of least barfiest but still very very barfy Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, does not "even consider [her]self wealthy."
2. HA HA Ann Romney is VERY WEALTHY: "The couple made $20.9 million last year, making more in a day than an average American makes in a year, and are worth about $250 million overall."
Yikes, these people. Yikes.
Quote of the Day
"I think [the 2012 presidential campaign] been the worst campaign I've ever seen in my life. I hate that people think compromise is a dirty word. It's not a dirty word. ... I think the rest of the world is looking at us these days and saying, 'What are you doing?'"—Former First Lady Barbara Bush.
HA HA SHE SURE IS RIGHT!
I wonder if she's spoken to her son, George W. Bush, about all this zany divisiveness and intractable partisanship and whence it all came!
