Lady Sophie Snugglepuss
Assvertising
Repeat offender in this series, Klondike, which is owned by Unilever, whose brands (which include Axe and Dove, among others) constitute probably something like a third of the entries in this series, is running an awesome new campaign called "5 Seconds to Glory," in which someone has to put up with some HORRIBLE SHIT for five seconds to get a Klondike bar, like listen to his wife:
A white dude in his 30s sits on his couch watching TV. "New Klondike Mint Chocolate Chip bars present 5 Seconds to Glory!" exclaims a male voiceover, as the dude's white wife comes in and sits next to him on the couch. "Mark verses Actually Listening to His Wife!" says the voiceover, as she begins to talk to Mark about painting their foyer yellow. He turns toward her and makes a face of stern concentration, as a countdown clock ticks down from 5. After 5 seconds, a bell dings and he jumps up and cheers. Confetti and balloons fall and two blond women in short skirts and go-go boots run out and hand him a Klondike bar, while his wife looks on, confused. Cue the "What would you do for a Klondike bar?" jingle.
Yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikes.
For what is probably the nine dozenth time in seven years, I will point out that this advert, in relying on the Patriarchal (and heterocentrist) narratives about women being boring and talkative and men being inattentive and poor listeners, insults not merely women, but men, too. The ad team who designed it was comprised almost exclusively of men (the team included one woman).
It is feminists, of course, who have the terrible reputation as man-haters, but it isn't we who consider all men babies, dopes, dogs, and potential rapists. The holders of those views are the women and men who embrace, perpetuate, and trade on the narratives of the Patriarchy—which itself, after all, takes a rather unpleasantly dim view of most people.
[H/T to Deeky.]
And a Great Cheer Arose Across the Land
Larry Summers has FINALLY broken his legendary silence about the Winklevoss twins. It turns out they are assholes.
I don't know what I love more about that article: The fact that some dipshit thinking a pair of twin dipshits are assholes is considered news at all, or the fact that it's only considered news worthy of CNN's Money section.
(If you have no idea what this post is about: 1. You probably have not seen The Social Network. 2. You are lucky.)
Shocking
Judd: "Addressing reports that Bachmann suffers from migraine headaches, Tim Pawlenty told reporters, 'All of the candidates I think are going to have to be able to demonstrate they can do all of the job all of the time. There's no real time off in that job.' There is speculation that the Pawlenty campaign is responsible for pushing the original story about Bachmann's migraines to the Daily Caller."
Mm-hmm.
Let us all take note that Pim Tawlenty doesn't even think he can beat Michele Bachmann on the merits.
Wednesday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by Lissie's Reservoir of Contempt for Arguments Against Same-Sex Marriage.
Recommended Reading:
Andy: Video of Al Franken Destroying 'Focus on the Family' Witness at DOMA Hearing [Transcript will be here when available.]
Eric: Wall Street Journal Writers Have "Total Editorial Freedom" to Defend Murdoch (Sure.)
Miriam: Woman Convicted of Vehicular Homicide for Crossing the Street to Get Home from Bus Stop
Crunktastic: Tough Titty: On Feminist Mothering and the Breastfeeding Doll
Kelly: [TW for discussion of eating, body policing] Reasons Aren't Excuses
Angry Asian Man: [TW for sexism] How to Snag a Beijing Billionaire
Two pieces on Somalia that are must-reads:
Atrios: So Trite (See the linked piece there.)
Jeremy Scahill in The Nation [TW for torture]: The CIA's Secret Sites in Somalia
Leave your links and recommendations in comments...
Of Course
Actual Headline: Chris Brown Cast in Romantic Comedy Based on Advice Book.
Immediately, I knew exactly which "advice book" it would be, and my intuition was soon confirmed:
The singer-actor's rep tells Us Weekly that Brown, 22, will play a role in the upcoming comedy Think Like a Man. The highly-anticipated film is an adaptation of Steve Harvey's New York Times best-selling book Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.Perfect.
Let's keep our fingers crossed there's a role for Charlie Sheen in this forthcoming cinematic masterpiece!
[Related Reading: Steve Harvey is back with more of his wisdom about men and women and relationships.]
Open Thread & News Round-Up: Debt Negotiations
Here's the latest...
The Hill—House GOP passes ill-fated 'cut, cap, and balance' legislation:
House Republicans on Tuesday approved an ambitious but legislatively ill-fated plan to enact deep spending restraints that could clear the decks for a compromise over the debt limit.WaPo—Obama hails deficit-reduction plan gaining momentum in Senate: "President Obama on Tuesday hailed an ambitious new deficit-reduction plan that is gaining momentum in the Senate, calling it a 'very significant step' and saying it could provide the vehicle to break an impasse over raising the federal borrowing limit while cutting the nation's debt. Appearing at the regular White House news briefing, Obama said the bipartisan proposal is 'broadly consistent' with the approach he has advocated, in that it reduces discretionary spending and tackles health-care spending and entitlements while also raising additional revenue."
The so-called "cut, cap and balance" measure passed on a party-line vote, 234-190, as nine Republicans — including presidential candidates Michele Bachmann (Minn.) and Ron Paul (Texas) — and five Democrats defected.
Democrats excoriated the GOP for advancing the bill, which the White House has threatened to veto.
Ezra Klein in the WaPo—The Gang of Six's plan: Better than we're likely to do otherwise: "All in all, it looks a lot like the Simpson-Bowles plan, which was pretty much the point of the exercise. ... So though there's lots to argue with in this bill, and lots that I, personally, would like to change, I don't think there's much doubt that it's far better than what Congress is likely to do — or not do — if it fails."
The Hill—Key Dems: Gang of Six plan won't be ready for debt-limit deal by Aug. 2: "Senate Democratic whip Dick Durbin (Ill.), a member of the Gang of Six, said Tuesday the group's plan is not ready to be attached to legislation to increase the debt limit. ... Durbin said it could take weeks or months for the Congressional Budget Office to estimate the deficit-reduction effect of the massive package. He said flatly there is no time to do it before national borrowing authority runs out Aug. 2."
This is just such a clusterfuck. I don't even know what to say anymore.
Relatedly...
Think Progress—Nearly 10 Years Ago Today, the U.S. Began Borrowing Billions to Pay for the Bush Tax Cuts:
As debates about deficit reduction continued to be heavily tilted toward cutting spending, which threatens to undermine a fragile recovery, rather than raising revenue from those who can afford it, it's important to remember the budgetary impact of the Bush tax cuts.Discuss.
Nearly 10 years ago today, on August 1, 2001, the Associated Press reported that the Treasury Department was tapping $51 billion of credit in order to pay for the budgetary cost of the first round of Bush tax cuts' rebate checks. The AP reported at the time that Democratic Party opponents of the tax cuts worried that they'd return government budgets to "red ink."
...The opponents of the tax cut turned out to be right. The 2001 and 2003 tax cuts combined have blown a $2.5 trillion hole in America's budget and created deficits stretching on for years.
Quote of the Day
"You are the most vile, unprofessional, and despicable member of the US House of Representatives. If you have something to say to me, stop being a coward and say it to my face, otherwise, shut the heck up. ... You have proven repeatedly that you are not a Lady, therefore, shall not be afforded due respect from me!"—Republican Congressman Allen West (Florida), in an email to Democratic National Committee Chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz, who deigned to criticize on the House floor his support for the craptacular "Cut, Cap, and Balance" legislation to raise the debt ceiling.
Her criticism? Facts.
"The gentleman from Florida. who represents thousands of Medicare beneficiaries, as do I, is supportive of this plan that would increase costs for Medicare beneficiaries, unbelievable from a Member from South Florida," Wasserman Schultz said, saying the legislation "slashes Medicaid and critical investments essential to winning the future in favor of protecting tax breaks for Big Oil, millionaires, and companies who ship American jobs overseas."Someone please introduce Congressman West to the phrase "disproportionate response."
It's 2011 in the United States, and yet...
Two of the top US stories on CNN.com at the moment are:
The school board in Memphis says it won't open schools until the city comes up with $55 million. The City of Memphis owes the school district $151 million.
The Commercial Appeal [Memphis] reports:
Classes for Memphis City Schools will not start this fall until the City Council deposits $55 million -- the amount the city has budgeted for schools from tax revenue -- in the district's account, school board members decided Tuesday night.
The board voted 8-1 to delay the start of the school year indefinitely, putting the system in the limelight as the district attempts to force city leaders to make good on funding promises.
"We've been patient; we've cut 1,500 jobs," said board member Tomeka Hart. "We're not going for everything. We're not saying give us everything you owe. We are just saying we have to have the money in the bank from our city so we can pay our bills.
Meanwhile, twenty-four cities in the Southeast and Midwest may soon be without airline service:
Facing mounting cost pressures, including the cost of fuel and losing some $14 million a year, [Delta] plans to cut flights to small cities that are not profitable for it anymore. The cuts would have a huge effect on the economy and be a devastating blow to small towns mostly in the Midwest.
These are the cities Delta says would be affected:
Muscle Shoals in Alabama; Fort Dodge, Mason City, Sioux City, Waterloo in Iowa; Hibbing [sic, last I checked, it was in Minnesota], Alpena, Iron Mountain, Pellston, Sault Ste Marie, Escanaba in Michigan; Thief River Falls, International Falls, Brainerd, Bemidji in Minnesota; Greenville, Tupelo, Hattiesburg in Mississippi; Butte in Montana; Devils Lake, Jamestown in North Dakota; Pierre, Watertown, Aberdeen in South Dakota.
Delta was flying to these cities in conjunction with the Essential Air Service (EAS) program, created to ensure small communities continue to have access to passenger air service.You may remember that Delta recently merged with Midwest-based Northwest Airlines. Whoops! The invisible hand strikes again. It's always doing that in Hibbing.
In some cases, airline service in EAS markets is subsidized by the government to the tune of $200 million a year. Those subsidies are scheduled to expire in 2013 if not approved by Congress.
So here we are. We can't find money for education. We can't provide services (or pay private companies to provide services) to help keep our smaller cities connected to the rest of the country (see also: Postal Service, United States).
Actively or passively, we in the United States are fostering our own isolation and ignorance. We deserve better.
DOMA Hearing
As I mentioned yesterday, there is a Senate Judiciary Committee hearing today on the Respect for Marriage Act, which seeks to repeal DOMA.
You can watch it live here.
Senator Al Franken was just doing a very good job of reminding me of the dearly departed Senator Paul Simon again.
Three Things I Like About Jesse Eisenberg
1. He is a good actor who tends to pick projects I enjoy watching.
2. He fosters cats. If you can't watch the whole interview, the summary is Conan O'Brien asking him if his "life has changed considerably since Social Network came out," to which Eisenberg replies, "Well, I've got more cats," and then goes on to explain: "Well, you know, I'm a foster parent for cats, and, um, um, the more movies I do, the more guilty I feel, and, um, the more cats I feel the need to get to alleviate the guilt from doing the movies, and then if a movie is, god forbid, popular, then I have to get even more cats… I have two now BUT I'm on kind of a list where they can deliver them to the house, so it's two at the moment. … And, if you haven't been to New York, the apartments are tiny, and so, to be a foster parent for cats is basically to have, like, you know, tenants coming in and out, like, if you live in a house, it'd be like the equivalent of having, like, a lot of people coming and staying over, uh, because my apartment's so small. So, I have a lot of cats, a lot of cat food, a lot of litter, and, um, nothing else in the apartment. … My life is basically just, you know, feeding and cleaning cats. And then I get to be the Sexiest Geek Alive."
3. He does not like rape jokes:
LMD: When a comedy [like 30 Minutes or Less, Eisenberg's new film] is this raunchy, is there such a thing as going too far?Eisenberg is, in addition to being an actor, a writer. It would be swell if he started writing some of his own material, sans rape jokes, because I suspect there's some significant bit of crossover between survivors and people who appreciate self-deprecating, slightly neurotic, highly intelligent actors who dig cats.
JE: There is stuff in this movie that I'm uncomfortable with. I don't like to use the "R" word, for example. Rape, for example. I'm very uncomfortable with that word, personally, because I do work with domestic violence organizations and I'm very aware of the alarming statistics of women who are abused. So I'm very uncomfortable with that. I'm not uncomfortable with the sexual jokes. Sometimes I think they're less funny than others, I don't care about that, because it doesn't harm anybody. I'm uncomfortable with saying "rape," I don't like saying that, I never say it in my life. If somebody says it, I cringe. I don't like it when people make jokes about that word.
[H/T to @fakeplasticstar.]
The War for Women
How about a little potential good news to start the day?
Virtually all health insurance plans could soon be required to offer female patients free coverage of prescription birth control, breast-pump rentals, counseling for domestic violence, and annual wellness exams and HIV tests as a result of recommendations released Tuesday by an independent advisory panel of health experts.There is no guarantee these recommendations will be adopted, and, naturally, the "pro-life" brigade is already throwing a shit-fit about the possibility because, despite whatever bullshit rationale they tack onto their protestations, they hate women having agency, choices, and autonomy. But, as Digby points out, this is a fight worth having, especially because "liberals will win it."
The health-care law adopted last year directed the Obama administration to draw up a list of preventive services for women that all new health plans must cover without deductibles or co-payments. While the guidelines suggested Tuesday by a committee of the National Academy of Sciences' Institute of Medicine are not binding, the panel conducted its year-long review at the request of Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius.
In a statement, Sebelius praised the committee's work as "historic" and "based on science and existing literature."
"We are reviewing the report closely and will release the department's recommendations...very soon," she added.
Think Progress has more.
Breaking Bad
Does anyone here besides Deeky and me watch Breaking Bad and want a weekly discussion thread on it...?
If yes, please also consider this the discussion thread for Episode One of Season Four, which was OMFG SO GOOD AND SO HORRIBLE, which is no doy basically a perfect episode of Breaking Bad.
OMG you guys I think Jesse's brain is broked.
Film Corner!
Below, the trailer for the upcoming box office smash from Steven Soderbergh Contagion, the working title for which my top secret sources (full disclosure: I don't actually have any top secret sources) have informed me was Oh Noes! White People Are Getting Sick, Ya'll!
Dame Gwyneth Paltrow was at a groundbreaking ceremony for a new factory, at which people of Asian descent were present (UH-OH!), according to the voiceover by her movie-husband Matt Damon. He is asked if she mentioned seeing anyone who was sick, and he says nope! Over a scene of Dame Gwyneth Paltrow hugging her movie-child which is supposed to be heartbreaking (but isn't, because, really, everyone's pretty tired of her waxing anecdotal in real life about favorite fishmongers and her didactic preaching about grody fatties, so if there's one person we're prepared to view as a cinematic metaphor for self-indulgent celebrity and thus respond with apathy as her privileged character dies of bird flu, it's Dame Gwyneth Paltrow), Matt Damon says, "She said she was just jetlagged." Whoops!
"ONE TOUCH" ominously looms onscreen, stark text floating against a backdrop of, I dunno, red blood cells and coffee grounds or something. "TRANSMISSION."
It is at this point that I begin to recall, not in a conscious way but a visceral way, in which a memory does not lay itself across the mind but crawls up from the depths of one's gut, dragging behind it a creeping unease, a time in which men (mostly) were dying of a disease the name of which my nation's president would not utter, and there was talk of TRANSMISSION through water fountains and sweat and kisses and maybe all it took was ONE TOUCH. And I'm really grossed out by this movie, because, while the stuff of that memory shouldn't be off-limits, the fact that this trailer doesn't seem to share that memory with me at all, just seems to pretend it never happened and this is just entertainment, makes something well up in my throat, disgust I think, and I remember having this feeling before with other "disease thrillers" that want to deny in the interest of fun and profit what should be a communal memory that gives us all pause, we people of a certain age.
Anyway! I soldier on.
Dr. Kate Winslet exposits to Matt Damon that "the average person touches their face three to five times every waking minute; in between, we're touching doorknobs, water fountains (!), and each other." Scenes of people touching things. Scenes of Dame Gwyneth Paltrow getting sick. Cut to Dr. Laurence Fishburne expositing, "So we have a virus with no treatment protocol, and no vaccine at this time."
"ONE INSTANT" ominously looms onscreen. "INFECTION."
Dame Gwyneth Paltrow is in the hospital. Matt Damon is panicked. She does not have a history of seizures! She makes some kind of contorted face. (ACTING!) Cut to Dr. Fishburne telling Dr. Winslet, "As of last night, there are 32 cases."
"ONE CONTACT" ominously looms onscreen. "CONTAGION."
"Unfortunately, she did die," Dr. Someone-Who-Looks-Like-Hank-Azaria-with-a-Beard tells Matt Damon, who doesn't get it. The doctor has to repeat himself. Matt Damon is shocked! "What are you talking about?!" he shouts. "What happened to her? WHAT HAPPENED TO HER?!"
It is at this point that I start to think about the privilege of being a (relatively or objectively) rich, white, straight, Western person, where your partner/spouse dying of a virus for which there is no medicine (either at all, or available to you) is such a rarity that you cannot conceive of its ever happening to your family, and I Google statistics on malaria deaths worldwide, and I read about how malaria killed between 708,000 and 1,003,000 people in 2008 alone, 89% of which occurred in Africa, and about how "Malaria is the 2nd leading cause of death from infectious diseases in Africa, after HIV/AIDS," and suddenly I am just HATING this fucking trailer, and I don't even care if the movie has some awesome message (spoiler alert: it doesn't!) about rich, white, straight, Western persons taking for granted that we PROBABLY WON'T DIE OF A CURABLE AND PREVENTABLE DISEASE, because it's being marketed as: "An action-thriller centered on the threat posed by a deadly disease and an international team of doctors contracted by the CDC to deal with the outbreak." Barrrrrrf!
In fact, DOUBLE BARF because also I already saw this movie when it was called Outbreak.
Anyway! I soldier on.
Because white people are getting sick, there are helicopters and government types looking concerned and concerns about someone having "weaponized the bird flu." Dr. Fishburne says, "Someone doesn't HAVE to weaponize the bird flu. The birds are doing that."
LOL WHUT. What is this movie?!
Enter Jude Law, who's playing a Professor of Counting from Cockney University: "On day one, there were two people, and then four, and then sixteen. In two months, it's a billion. That's where we're headed!" In case you are a visual learner, images of two, four, sixteen, and one billion people are helpfully provided.
National Guard. The president is going "underground." (LULZ.) Panic. Suspicious media. Destroying samples in a lab. Monkeys in cages. Empty airport. Trash piled up on a city street.
UH-OH! Dr. Winslet is sick. Dr. Fishburne promises to get her "out." There are lots of people whose lives are affected—lots and lots of WHITE PEOPLE. Gwyneth Paltrow, Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Jude Law, John Hawkes, Marion Cotillard… GOOD THING DR. FISHBURNE IS SO INTERESTED IN SAVING THEM! Except for Dame Gwyneth Paltrow, of course. Who already died. RIP GOOP.
"NO ONE IS IMMUNE" ominously looms onscreen. "TO FEAR."
Montage of more "action thriller about a deadly disease" stuff. "It's mutating!" someone says. Of course it is.
Thank You, Mr. President
At today's press briefing, White House spokesman Jay Carney told reporters that President Obama is putting his support behind the Respect for Marriage Act, the bill introduced in the Senate by Senators Dianne Feinstein (D-CA), Patrick Leahy (D-VT), and Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY), which would repeal the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), the legislation which, among other things, prohibits the federal government from recognizing same-sex marriage.
The president has "long called for a legislative appeal for the so-called Defense of Marriage Act, which continues to have a real impact on families," White House spokesman Jay Carney told reporters at Tuesday's briefing. He said the president "is proud" to support the Respect For Marriage Act, "which would take the Defense of Marriage Act off the books for once and for all."I don't know what "supporting" the Respect for Marriage Act will mean, if anything, beyond sending Carney out there to say the president supports it, but even if it's just that, that's an important follow-up to the administration having announced in February that it would no longer defend the constitutionality of DOMA in court.
(As an aside, when I say—over and over—that I want Obama to publicly give a shit about the national reproductive rights battle being waged, and people say, "Well, what do you expect him to do?" the answer is that I expect THIS. I expect him to use his bully pulpit to clearly state what side he's on. And here is evidence that he does it, when it matters to him, either personally or politically.)
On Wednesday the Senate Judiciary Committee will hold a hearing on the new bill, which would repeal all three sections of DOMA -- which federally defined marriage as a union between a man and a woman -- including section 1, which is the name; section 2, which instructs states not to recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states; and section 3, which prohibits the federal government from recognizing legally performed same-sex marriages.Of course they will, because a hearing on same-sex marriage wouldn't be complete without the American Family Values Children Christian Liberty Freedom Patriot Association Foundation Organization dragging a metric fuckton of dinosaur scat into the room to stink up the proceedings.
Representatives from both pro- and anti-gay marriage groups will testify before the panel.
Go RFMA!
