Did you just see that? What the heck was it?
Open Thread: WTF Wisconsin
Despite State Senate Majority Leader Scott Fitzgerald's previous promise that he would not attempt to pass any portions of the "budget-repair bill" without Democrats present, and despite Governor Scott Walker's repeated (and laughable) assertion that the part of the "budget-repair bill" which decimated collective bargaining was strictly about Wisconsin's finances, the Wisconsin GOP just broke the legislation in half and just passed the anti-union portion separately, 4-2.
People outside the Capitol are reportedly chanting, "Shame! Shame!" and people inside the Capitol are crying and shouting "You lied! You lied! You lied to Wisconsin!"
Damn.
And, now, Indiana...
So Indiana has a bill up, House Bill 1210. House Bill 1210 is a whole lot of fuckery with a great big lie ensconced into it. You see, according to HB 1210, a doctor must inform a patient, orally and in writing of:
the possibility of increased risk of breast cancer following an induced abortion and the natural protective effect of a completed pregnancy in avoiding breast cancer.Small (where "small" is really "ENORMOUS") problem with that being:
[S]cientific research studies have not found a cause-and-effect relationship between abortion and breast cancer.And:
* Breast cancer risk is increased for a short time after a full-term pregnancy (that is, a pregnancy that results in the birth of a living child).But what would they know, right? They're just The American Cancer Society".
* Induced abortion is not linked to an increase in breast cancer risk.
* Spontaneous abortion is not linked to an increase in breast cancer risk.
The level of scientific evidence for these findings was considered to be "well established" (the highest level).
The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) Committee on Gynecologic Practice also reviewed the available evidence in 2003 and again in 2009. ACOG published its most recent findings in June 2009. At that time, the Committee said, "Early studies of the relationship between prior induced abortion and breast cancer risk were methodologically flawed. More rigorous recent studies demonstrate no causal relationship between induced abortion and a subsequent increase in breast cancer risk."
This bill has a lot of reprehensible, galling horseshit in it. Check it out, all stikeouts and bold are theirs, not mine:
(1) At least eighteen (18) hours before the abortion and in the presence of the pregnant woman, the physician who is to perform the abortion, the referring physician or a physician assistant (as defined in IC 25-27.5-2-10), an advanced practice nurse (as defined in IC 25-23-1-1(b)), or a midwife (as defined in IC 34-18-2-19) to whom the responsibility has been delegated by the physician who is to perform the abortion or the referring physician hasFirst, what other out-patient medical procedure requires the physician to give a patient his or her "medical license number and an emergency telephone number where the physician or the physician's designee may be contacted on a twenty-four (24) hour a day, seven days a week"? Uh, none.orallyinformed the pregnant woman orally and in writing of the following:
(A) The name of the physician performing the abortion, the physician's medical license number, and an emergency telephone number where the physician or the physician's designee may be contacted on a twenty-four (24) hour a day, seven (7) day a week basis.
(B) That follow-up care by the physician or the physician's designee is available on an appropriate and timely basis when clinically necessary.
(B)(C) The nature of the proposed procedure.or treatment.
(C)(D) The risks of and alternatives to the procedure,or treatment.including:
(i) the risk of infection and hemorrhage;
(ii) the potential danger to a subsequent pregnancy;
(iii) the potential danger of infertility; and
(iv) the possibility of increased risk of breast cancer following an induced abortion and the natural protective effect of a completed pregnancy in avoiding breast cancer.
(E) That human physical life begins when a human ovum is fertilized by a human sperm.
(D)(F) The probable gestational age of the fetus at the time the abortion is to be performed, including:an offer to provide:
(i) a picture or drawing of a fetus;
(ii) the dimensions of a fetus; and
(iii) relevant information on the potential survival of an unborn fetus;
at this stage of development.
(G) That medical evidence shows that a fetus can feel pain at or before twenty (20) weeks of postfertilization age.
[...]
(2) At least eighteen (18) hours before the abortion, the pregnant woman will beorallyinformed orally and in writing of the following:
(A) That medical assistance benefits may be available for prenatal care, childbirth, and neonatal care from the county office of the division of family resources.
(B) That the father of the unborn fetus is legally required to assist in the support of the child. In the case of rape, the information required under this clause may be omitted.
(C) That adoption alternatives are available and that adoptive parents may legally pay the costs of prenatal care, childbirth, and neonatal care.
(D) That there are physical risks to the pregnant woman in having an abortion, both during the abortion procedure and after.
(E) That Indiana has enacted the safe haven law under IC 31-34-2.5.
(F) That materials developed by the state department in section 1.5 of this chapter:
(i) will be provided to the pregnant woman by the physician providing the abortion as a hard copy;
(ii) are available on the state department's Internet web site;
(iii) provide scientific information about the unborn child; and
(iv) list agencies in the area that offer alternatives to abortion, including agencies that offer alternatives to abortion at no cost to the pregnant woman.
(3) The pregnant woman certifies in writing, before the abortion is performed, that:
(A) the information required by subdivisions (1) and (2) has been provided to the pregnant woman;
(B) the pregnant woman has been offered the opportunity
to view the fetal ultrasound imaging and hear the auscultation of the fetal heart tone if the fetal heart tone is audible and that the woman has:
(i) viewed or refused to view the offered fetal ultrasound imaging; and
(ii) listened to or refused to listen to the offered auscultation of the fetal heart tone if the fetal heart tone is audible; and
(C) the pregnant woman has been given a written copy of the printed materials described in section 1.5 of this chapter.
(b) Before an abortion is performed, the pregnant womanmay, upon the pregnant woman's request, shall view the fetal ultrasound imaging and hear the auscultation of the fetal heart tone if the fetal heart tone is audible unless the pregnant woman certifies in writing, before the abortion is performed, that the pregnant woman does not want to view the fetal ultrasound imaging.
Also, this edit really sums it up about how they view women:
... the pregnant womanmay, upon the pregnant woman's request, shall ...
More Today in Rape Culture
[Trigger warning for sexual violence, victim-blaming, and rape apologia.]
Covering the same case as the New York Times was covering as discussed in Shaker mmy's guest post, CNN's Brooke Baldwin interviewed the author of a big piece in the Houston Chronicle, Cindy Horswell. And it's basically a clusterfuck of fail.
[Transcript below.]
I see via CNN's transcript that after the point at which this video clip ends, Horswell continued on-air: "It will all have to come out fully. I know she's got a Web site where she sounds fairly confused. It's basically her Facebook page where she knows a lot of people are looking at her now like she's caused problems. And she's feeling a lot of conflicting feelings." Wow.
Where to begin? Horswell refers to the videotaped gang rape, which was evidently one of several different assaults across different days, as the "main event"—which is a technically accurate term given its synonymity with "primary incident," but an extremely poor choice of words, given that "main event" is generally used to describe some sort of entertainment experience. Baldwin then refers to the ringleader of the perpetrators exhorting other men to "partake," rather than, say, participate. Then there is the victim-blaming—the uncritical reporting of the defense attorney's nonsense, the noting that the child "was balking and there were threats made," even after Baldwin notes that 11-year-olds cannot consent.
And, perhaps worst of all, the observation about how this gang rape is really tearing up the basketball team: "It's disturbing the whole basketball team, and I think they lost on Wednesday. Needless to say they've lost a couple of players. … I think the basketball team is ranked third in the state. And so at least two of the people played on the team and were starters, and now they're not on there anymore." Boo fucking hoo.
Welcome to the rape culture, where we're supposed to feel sorry for basketball players who lost a game because they're distraught that two of their go-to guys were tempted into gang-raping an 11-year-old seductress.
*rage*seethe*boil*
BROOKE BALDWIN, CNN ANCHOR:I want you to begin, for people who aren't familiar with it, begin with this alleged gang rape. I know it happened last November. So how did police learn about it?
CINDY HORSWELL, SENIOR WRITER, HOUSTON CHRONICLE: Well, the young girl was in school, and these videos— Onlookers of this event— We know it was at least on one day, and it might have been other days also things happened, but on the one main event apparently videotaped and photographed things with their cell phones. And so it was getting, becoming a very popular—went viral basically around the school, and someone reported it to the school authorities that they had seen this; they were very upset because they knew the young girl and recognized her. And so school officials—
BALDWIN: Hang on. Let me back you up. This whole thing started according to your article from this 19-year-old young man who sort of lured this 11-year-old into a mobile home, an abandoned mobile home, allegedly. And then from there he then called in other young men to partake. Yes?
HORSWELL: Right. It started out—he asked her to go riding around with him, and three other young men, I think it was. And they first went to another person's house, and it kind of started actually at this one house, and then when a relative of that person came home, they scrambled out the back window and they ended up in that mobile home, and it continued on there.
BALDWIN: Now, so far, 18 young men have been arrested. According to you, they range in age from middle school all the way up to 27 years of age. How are police tracking them down—all through these videos that were allegedly shot?
HORSWELL: I believe so—and interviews, and it's been a long investigation. But I think it's 17 total so far. But it's been very— Because people are wondering who's involved, who's not. It's disturbing the whole basketball team, and I think they lost on Wednesday. Needless to say they've lost a couple of players. Some of these people are adults. Some of these people had criminal records.
BALDWIN: Because you're saying some of these young men were on this Cleveland High School star basketball team. Is that what you got from investigators?
HORSWELL: Right, right. I think the basketball team is ranked third in the state. And so at least two of the people played on the team and were starters, and now they're not on there anymore, I don't believe, because they haven't returned to school.
BALDWIN: CNN has not been able to confirm that, but, again, that is confirmation from you, according to investigators. But I want to get to this 11-year-old. I know you spoke with her mother, exclusively. How is she doing?
HORSWELL: Um, her mother is saddened because she's prevented from being with her daughter, as is her brothers and sisters and father.
BALDWIN: Why is that?
HORSWELL: You know, um, Children's Protective Services will not discuss the case because there's a gag order, but they've had some hearings. The parents tell me that she's been put in foster care as a safe house because, as these names come out, as this trial goes on, that it's going to become, you know, dangerous for— Actually them, too; they should move from the area, they believe, because there could be, there have been people calling the house and just saying, you know, like, "Where is she?" And they don't believe the mother that she's not there. Then they cuss and get upset. And they're worried it could become worse than that, and so they just kind of don't want any more pressure on her or the family.
BALDWIN: Understandable. Understandable. I know you spoke with an attorney representing three of these young men. What did he say? What is his defense?
HORSWELL: Well, he believes that, you know, you can't— He's not trying to say anything that hap—whatever happened—that anything would be good for an 11-year-old, but he said the little girl is not, you know— It wasn't like she was completely innocent in this case; it wasn't like she was kidnapped or something, and whether he was indicating that she might have been a willing participant.
BALDWIN: At age 11, as you point out, an 11-year-old cannot legally give consent!
HORSWELL: Right. And I do believe at some point a police affidavit says she was not—that she was balking and there were threats made.
[This is where the videotape ends, but I see via CNN's transcript that Horswell continued: "It will all have to come out fully. I know she's got a Web site where she sounds fairly confused. It's basically her Facebook page where she knows a lot of people are looking at her now like she's caused problems. And she's feeling a lot of conflicting feelings."]
On Public Broadcasting
Two points:
1) Detractors of public broadcasting act as if taxpayers are supporting the U.S. equivalent of the BBC. Nope.
2) Voice of America. It is awful. Also, it receives 100% of its funding from the U.S. government. Oh, and its budget is larger than NPR's. It is off the table?
Today in Totally Not Terrorism
[Trigger warning for racism; terrorism.]
Hey, remember back in January, I wrote about an incident of Totally Not Terrorism that our Liberal Media couldn't be arsed to report widely, in which a backpack bomb was found along the parade route of a Martin Luther King Day event in Spokane, Washington...?
And remember how I was all, "You probably haven't heard about it because our liberal media largely doesn't appear to give a fuck, an indifference that is almost as chilling as the evidence that white supremacist terrorist groups are escalating, as hate group trackers like the Southern Poverty Law Center have been saying, loudly, to resounding yawns from people with the sort of vast platform that, once upon a time, was used to raise awareness about these things."...?
I was, as you may also recall, just guessing that it was a white supremacist who was responsible for this act of domestic terrorism, because we didn't know. Yeah:
The FBI has made an arrest in connection with the attempted bombing along the route of the annual Martin Luther King Jr. Day parade in downtown Spokane.It would be awesome if our media could start caring about, talking about, raising awareness about radicalized white supremacist hate groups who are trying to kill US citizens on the basis of their skin color, before they're actually successful in hurting/killing people on massive scale.
An FBI source in Washington, D.C., said one man was arrested Wednesday outside a home near Colville, Stevens County. Agents, including a bomb expert from Quantico, Va., were preparing to search a house where others associated with the suspect were living, the source said.
The suspect is believed to be affiliated with white supremacists, the source said.
Or, you know, every cable news channel could just endlessly discuss the horror that someone at NPR called the Tea Partiers racist.
Oh Goody
Gingrich planning May presidential announcement. I hope he does it on my birthday! There's nothing I like better for my birthday than GARBAGE!
Speaking of how Newt Gingrich is a terrible person (whut?), here he is explaining why he is a thrice-married serial cheater:
"There's no question at times of my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked far too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate," said Gingrich. "And what I can tell you is that when I did things that were wrong, I wasn't trapped in situation ethics, I was doing things that were wrong, and yet, I was doing them."Let he among us whose penis hasn't been been driven to tumescent wandering by patriotism cast the first stone! I can't even LOOK at a star or a stripe without my nipples getting hard.
"I found that I felt compelled to seek God's forgiveness. Not God's understanding, but God's forgiveness. I do believe in a forgiving God. And I think most people, deep down in their hearts hope there's a forgiving God. Somebody once said that when we're young, we seek justice, but as we get older, we seek mercy. There's something to that, I think.So vote for Newt. Unless you think you're better than GOD or something.
"I feel that I'm now 67 I'm a grandfather. I have two wonderful grandchildren. I have two wonderful daughters and two great sons in law. Callista and I have a great marriage. I think that I've learned an immense amount. And I do feel, in that sense, that God has given me, has blessed me with an opportunity as a person."
Number of the Day
16. The number of US states that have abolished the death penalty, after Illinois Governor Pat Quinn signed it out of existence and commuted the sentences of Illinois' remaining 15 death row inmates.
No state has made a greater effort to "fix" their broken death penalty than Illinois. A ten year moratorium on executions was established in January 2000, and since then various commissions and studies have attempted to grapple with the challenge of imposing an irreversible punishment in an error-prone system. After over a decade of trying, Illinois politicians came to the conclusion that it simply cannot be done – that capital punishment in Illinois is beyond repair. The system will always be prone to error, and the punishment of death will always be irreversible.Emphasis original.
So they did the right thing, and indeed the only logical thing. They abolished the death penalty. Folks in other states where the flaws and shortcomings of capital punishment have become painfully clear should look to this example. What was true in Illinois is equally true in Connecticut, Maryland, Montana, or for that matter any other state that still keeps the death penalty on its books. The danger of executing the innocent can never be eliminated, the drain on the treasury will always divert resources from proven crime prevention measures, and the toll on the families of victims as they are dragged through a grueling process will always be both severe and completely unnecessary.
The Illinois experience has shown that, for both practical and moral reasons, the death penalty does not work. It is an irreversible punishment in an imperfect world, and a cruel and degrading punishment in a world where we should be striving to respect and promote human dignity. By rejecting the death penalty, Illinois has liberated itself from this failed experiment, and has scored a major victory for human rights.
[H/T to @scatx.]
Daily Dose of Cute
Ah, such a cozy scene--relaxing by the fire (as there was one going):
But! No more!
Part of Accountability is Naming Names
[Trigger warning for sexual violence; clergy abuse.]
The Catholic Church continues to insist (despite all evidence to the contrary) that it's interested in holding predatory priests accountable for their actions, but, in the latest round of wild misconduct—in which the Church has once again been exposed as having protected predatory priests—the Archdiocese won't even release the names of priests who have been suspended.
The Archdiocese of Philadelphia announced Tuesday that it had suspended 21 priests from active ministry in connection with accusations that involved sexual abuse or otherwise inappropriate behavior with minors.Nice.
…The archdiocese's action follows a damning grand jury report issued Feb. 10 that accused the archdiocese of a widespread cover-up of predatory priests, stretching over decades, and said that as many as 37 priests remained active in the ministry despite credible accusations against them.
Of those 37 priests, 21 were suspended; three others already had been placed on administrative leave after the grand jury detailed accusations against them. Five others would have been suspended, the church said in a statement, but three are no longer active and two are no longer active in the Philadelphia Archdiocese. The church said that in eight cases, no further investigation was warranted.
The statement said the accusations against the 21 ranged from "sexual abuse of a minor to boundary issues with minors," but did not describe them further.
Nor did it name the 21 whom it suspended, drawing the fury of groups representing abuse victims. Many parishioners are likely to learn that their priest was accused when he fails to appear for Ash Wednesday services.
Refusing to make the names public is quite evidently a strategy to contain the quantity of lawsuits the Archdiocese will be facing, which will cost millions of dollars in legal fees and payouts; if perpetrators aren't known, it limits the number of survivors who will come forward.
Priorities: The Catholic Church leadership has them. They are garbage.
If only the Church were half as interested in protecting children as it is in protecting its pocketbook.
[Commenting Guidelines: Please take the time to make sure your criticisms are clearly directed at the Catholic Church leadership and not at "Catholics," many of whom are themselves critical of the failures of Church leadership.]
Quote of the Day
[Trigger warning for sexual violence.]
"If it's so terrible for boys to have to live with being rapists, would it not behoove society to teach them not to rape people?"—SKM, Very Smart Lady and Shakesville Contributor/Moderator, in comments, responding to the New York Times article in which compassion is expressed for the gang-rapists of an 11-year-old child, because "These boys have to live with this the rest of their lives."
Today in Rape Culture
by Shaker mmy
[Trigger warning for sexual violence, victim-blaming, and rape apologia.]
There is an awful story in the New York Times today: Vicious Assault Shakes Texas Town. It's about the arrest of 18 boys and men, ranging in age "from middle schoolers to a 27-year-old," for the gang-rape of an 11-year-old girl.
As horrible as this story is, the article serves as a great example of exactly what we mean by "rape culture."
1) By paragraph #4, we have been told the ages of the men and several have been personalized: "Five suspects are students at Cleveland High School, including two members of the basketball team. Another is the 21-year-old son of a school board member." Etc. All we know about the 11-year-old is her age and gender.
2) In paragraph #4, we read the following question: "[I]f the allegations are proved, how could [the community's] young men have been drawn into such an act?". Which suggests, of course, that it really isn't their fault they raped a child; they were just "drawn into it." Indeed, according to one of the people quoted, "These boys have to live with this the rest of their lives."
3) The actual word "rape" is avoided whenever possible. The reader is told that the girl had been forced to have sex, she was "sexually assaulted," and she was threatened with violence if she "did not comply."
4) Now ask yourself the reason for the following paragraph to have been included:
Residents in the neighborhood where the abandoned trailer stands — known as the Quarters — said the victim had been visiting various friends there for months. They said she dressed older than her age, wearing makeup and fashions more appropriate to a woman in her 20s. She would hang out with teenage boys at a playground, some said."Nowhere in this story is the following made clear:
— That an 11-year-old child cannot consent to sex. Even if she had not been "told she would be beaten if she did not comply," this would have been rape.
— That the victim also has to "live with this for the rest of her life." The boys chose to do the things they will have to live with. She did not.
— That the men involved were not "drawn into this," but made the conscious choice to rape a child.
— That our compassion and care should be directed first and foremost toward the victim rather than the boys, the school, the community, or anyone else.
— That just as we should not stand in judgment of the victim we should not venture to judge her mother. ("'Where was her mother? What was her mother thinking?' said Ms. Harrison, one of a handful of neighbors who would speak on the record.") For all we know, the woman had been frantically trying to get someone, anyone, to listen to her concerns about her daughter. Even if she hadn't been, parental neglect does not give other people a license to rape unsupervised children.
My impression when I finished reading the article was that the reader was being admonished to feel compassion and pain for the town and the boys. The victim had disappeared from article just as she had fled the town.
As so it goes—today in rape culture.
UPDATE FROM LISS: Sign the petition asking the New York Times to apologize for its victim-blaming garbage here.
Film Corner!
[Trigger warning for rape culture; rape jokes.]
Let us talk about the trailers for the upcoming film Paul (I'm so sorry, Spudsy), which looks like it was created by the top garbage scientists at Garbage Labs by cross-pollinating Encino Man with Mac and Me with garbage. Plus rape jokes!
Video Description: Two British schlubs are traveling across the US in an RV on "a tour of America's most famous UFO hotspots." Sure. Quirky diner. Pictures at Area 51. Big crash at night on a deserted Western highway. Obviously the other driver is a CGI alien named Paul, obviously voiced by Seth Rogen. Paul the Alien needs to get somewhere; it's "a matter of life and death." Sure. ROAD TRIP! Whoooooops the
In case one butt-probe joke is NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU, there is yet a second butt-probe joke in this trailer, as well as a scene in which one of the Secret Alien Agency Agents feels up Paul's "spaceman balls," only to have Paul shout in his face, "Get your goddamn hands off my motherfucking junk!" HA HA! "Don't touch my junk," amirite,
The profundity of my contempt for rape jokes that are supposed to be funny exclusively because they're happening to male characters is vast. VAST.
And the thing about these rape jokes—full-frontal flashing, butt-probing, and ball-molesting—is that part of their "humor" is just rank homophobia. It's not just supposed to be funny-horrifying because male characters are being sexually assaulted, but because they're being sexually assaulted by other male characters. And it's not merely "lol homo" stuff, which would be abhorrent enough, but these "jokes" suggest that the only type of male-male sexuality is aggressive and nonconsensual, which invokes and reinforces the trope of the predatory gay.
None of this is surprising, of course, given that the film was directed by the same guy who helmed the rape promoting Superbad, and written by Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, who aren't averse to rape jokes themselves (e.g. in Shaun of the Dead, Pegg's character tells his mother that his stepfather "touched" him "on several occasions," then admits, "That wasn't true. Made it up. Shouldn't have done. Sorry."), and co-stars Seth Rogen, who executive produced Superbad and starred in Observe and Report, which featured a "hilarious" rape scene right in the trailer.
Still. I expect more.
The Overton Window: Chapter Forty-Three
Oh, this is it, the moment where it all comes together! Or not. I dunno. Something definitely happens, so that's good, I guess.
Wherever they were going, the ride was awfully rough. Danny was holding on tight to a cargo strap near the open door at the rear of the moving truck, the only place in the metal compartment with a signal solid enough to make a call on Kearns's satellite phone.
From the back of the truck, Bailey calls 911.
Now, I have no idea why The Man Named Randy (or one of The Other Men Probably Not Named Randy) never stopped long enough to close up the back of the cargo truck. It seems to me, if you're going to drive around with one, maybe two, nuclear weapons in the back of your truck, along with a dead body, you'd not want to attract attention to yourself, and maybe you'd close the back of said truck so everyone thought maybe you were just hauling flat pack furniture or something. Because a giant bomb? Yeah, people are going to camera phone that shit all over Facebook.
"My name is Danny Bailey, I'm out in the desert somewhere northwest of Las Vegas, and I'm with FBI Special Agent Stuart Kearns. I'm in the back of a truck that's on the move, and this truck belongs to a terrorist organization that might have their hands on a nuclear weapon."
"What's your location, sir?"
"Listen, I know what you people can do. You already know where I am better than I do, you know whose phone I'm calling from, you know the route I'm on, and in about ten seconds you'll be sure who I am because you'll have verified my voiceprint, so stop wasting my time."
The irrepressible Danny Bailey, everyone! "Some odd noise broke onto the line for a time; not interference, but a series of electronic clicks, tones, and dropouts." See? Big Brother is everywhere! Especially at the 911 dispatch office. Danny tells them Operation Exigent is underway. Hold that thought, I'll come back to it.
Kearns was near the front wall, kneeling next to the tarp-wrapped bundle they'd both seen earlier, before the shooting had started.
It was a body, of course, and the face of the dead man had been uncovered. When Kearns turned to look at him, Danny didn't have to ask who it was that was lying there. He'd already known who it would be.
Do you know who that is? I don't. Really, I've no idea. I guess it is supposed to be obvious. Which is strange. The one thing that is supposed to make sense to us, supposed to be clear to us, is really a mystery. Oh, okay, then.
Agent Kearns had said that after these last few years of working this operation undercover—all the while doing his best to appear to be a raving militant agitator who'd turned against his government and was openly calling for a violent revolution—he really had only one remaining contact in the FBI. His frightening online persona was well-known to tens of thousands of fringe-group wackos and law enforcement personnel alike, but only one person alive could have credibly testified that Stuart Kearns was actually a loyal American doing his duty to protect and defend the United States. And here was that person, dead.
Oh, that guy! Whoever he was! The one guy who knew Kearns was still undercover! What about HR? And payroll? They knew, right? I mean, I bet Kearns still got paid, even if it was through some secret account to pay undercover agents, right? So there'd have to be like records of that, I'd assume. Because no one goes so far undercover as to be completely fucking alone, no matter what Beck wants us to believe. Given, Beck wants us to believe the UN is some sort of Islamofascist front, and if we're willing to accept that, we're probably willing to accept every stupid thing he lays out in this novel.
All of which is to say, I wasn't expecting him (whoever he was) to be in the bodybag. Hey, why is he in the bodybag? Let Bailey explain!
"So your guy over there on the floor: he brought them this one, and you brought yours. You both got managed so you didn't know what the other was doing, and we all got set up at once."
Oh! Okay, that makes perfect.... Wait. Whut? How many spare nukes does the FBI have? And why did Kearns' boss (whoever he was) sell one to Elmer/el-Amir at the same time Kearns sold them one? I understand Kearns was supposed to be really, really, really, really deep undercover, but ... Come on! This is just fucking stupid!
Nevermind. Let's look at the bomb.
"This looks like an old Mark 8 atomic bomb," Kearns said, "from the early 1950s." He pulled the light down closer and ran his hands over the surface, stopping at a series of seals and stickers that carried dates and the initials of inspectors. "It's been maintained all these years."
"So this is a live one, then?"
"Sure looks that way to me." A line of heavy metal conduit ran from the rear of the thing and Kearns followed it with a finger, pointing. The tubing went across the floor and through the wall to the driver's compartment. "And it looks like they've jury-rigged it to be set off from the front seat."
It's been maintained all these years? A 60 year-old nuclear weapon? Okay. That seems unlikely, but hey, what do I know?! I'm not alone in that thought either. Kearns doesn't know what's going on either. Bailey, ever helpful, explains:
"It's like I told you before. Whoever's behind this needed a patsy for a false-flag domestic attack, Stuart, and that's you. And they needed to make my people the enemy, and that's why I'm here."
"Based on your file, they could have had you picked up anytime they wanted, but they picked you up Friday night, to make you a part of this. And me, they've just kept me in cold storage—"
"Waiting for the right time, when they needed a couple of fall guys," Danny said. "The crazy Internet conspiracy theorist who incited these thugs into violence, and the lone nut ex-FBI man who helped them pull it off."
Ah, okay, got it. This is all an inside job! The FBI set up Operation Exigent to help them usher in martial law? I guess. No? Wait. If the FBI is behind this, what was the point of Bailey calling 911 to let them know there was a live nuke about to be exploded? Back during the Powerpoint, it seemed Darthur had a hand in Exigent. Right? Right. So Darthur has control of the FBI? And Kearns' boss (whoever he was) too? But he's dead. Because the nukes were real. Which the FBI maybe already knew, but Kearns' boss (whoever he was) didn't know? What? WHAT!
I don't understand.
Who is running Exigent? Who supplied the live nukes? Who is Elmer? And if right-wing extremists set off the bomb, is it fair to say right-wing extremists are patsies?
Obviously, this book seeks to paint right-wing teabaggers as the heroes. But, regardless who supplied the nukes, regardless under what circumstances, the right-wing teabaggers, led by Elmer and The Man Named Randy, are the ones, when all is said and done, carrying out the terrorist act. I am getting the distinct impression no one really thought this thing through.
The truck slowed briefly, made a turn onto what felt like a much smoother roadway, and then began to pick up speed again.
"I've got an idea," Danny said, "but I don't know if you'll like it."
He walked toward the tailgate, where the package they'd brought was strapped against the side of the compartment, and motioned for his partner to follow. When Kearns had sat and situated his injured leg, Danny crouched down and pulled off the tarp that was covering the device. He peeled off the keys that were taped near the arming panel and handed them to Kearns.
If one of these bombs was real, then it stood to reason that they both were real. And there was really only one way to find out.
Uh oh, what do you thing Bailey's plan will be? Something Youtubey and teabaggery and IN YOUR FACE. Like Miracle Whip. Oh, and a cargo van with a tailgate? Okay! Here’s the plan:
They fire up their nuke, which, if you remember, was modified with a TomTom so it would detonate when it got to the right coordinates, and change the proximity trigger.
Once the device had gotten its bearings, it was simple enough to reset the final destination on the touchscreen of the GPS detonator. It wasn't an address they selected, of course, just an empty point on the deserted road they were traveling, a little less than three miles ahead and counting down.
Not sure how they did that, but let's just suspend belief here for a moment. They got it changed, and the nuke will blow up in a few miles and not in Vegas. Whew! This would be the perfect time to jump out of the truck. Or not.
The older man lit up a cigarette, and he shook another one up from the pack and offered it across.
"Nah, I told you," Danny said. "I quit five years ago."
"Aw, come on. Special occasion."
"I took an oath to an old friend, Stuart, and if you met this woman, you'd know why I can't break it."
Even in his last moments, Bailey keeps his word to Molly. What a guy! What a woman! "When you put it that way, I guess I see what you mean," says Kearns? Really? You do? Because I don't. I don't see how putting it "that way" means a damn thing!
"Hey," Danny said, and he waited until his partner looked over. "The other night when you were telling me about your career with the FBI, you said that after all they'd put you through, you wondered sometimes why you stuck it out."
"Yeah."
"This is why, man. Tonight is why you stayed on."
To get blown up in the back of a van? He stayed on the get used by the FBI and framed as a terrorist? To help usher in the NWO? Yeah, good plan, Kearns, good reason for sticking with the career well past your prime.
Bailey and Kearns go on about oaths on the Bible and sacred honor and whatnot, and for some reason are basically acting like best buddies even though they hated each other just moments ago. Good writing. Character development! Kearns laments that their sacrifice will go unknown, but Bailey assures him "somebody'll figure it out. Somebody like me." Whew!
The device next to them issued a loud tone. A bright red light illuminated on the panel, under the word Proximity.
"Nice working with you, kid," Kearns said.
He reached out a hand and Danny Bailey took it in a firm clasp of solidarity.
And then:
I guess that's the end of their story arc.
Quote of the Day
"Since that accident, this is the first chance I have had to address such a large gathering of industry colleagues and the first thing I want to say is that I am sorry for what happened."—BP CEO Bob Dudley, "addressing the largest oil industry gathering since the disaster in the Gulf of Mexico last spring."
Someone more cynical than I, ahem, might suggest that delivering that apology to a group of his fellow oil executives gives the impression he's apologizing for inconveniencing them with bad press for their industry, and not apologizing for the actual, ya know, environmentally devastating spill.
[Via @PeterDaou.]
Daily Dose of Cute
"Mmph, urgh, grumph. Two-Legs, this position isn't working for me!"
"That's better. Now rub mah belleh!"
"Purrrrrrrrrrfect."
On Feminism and Fireworks
I just got a fun email from a male blogger (who rarely, if ever, blogs about "women's issues") telling me that my coverage of International Women's Day was crap. Err, "disappointing." He was expecting to have something better to link to than the garbage I've served up.
I'll pause momentarily so you can both appreciate the inherent irony and imagine the look on my face when I received a missive from a gentleman complaining that my recognition of International Women's Day was insufficient for his purposes of lazily linking to it so he didn't have to actually do any work himself.
And, you know, leaving aside the chutzpah of treating the acknowledgment of International Women's Day as woman's work and expressing disappointment in his unpaid subcontractor for doing substandard work that failed to meet his expectations of excellence for work he wanted to take credit for, I sort of understand his complaint. It's not like any of my IWD content is extraordinary, or even remarkable.
And partly that's a reflection of my ambivalence about marking a single day, or a single week, or a month—which is something about which I've written previously—and my consternation about how to mark it effectively, if it is worth marking, for reasons Renee elucidates here.
But it's also partly a manifestation of the reality that IWD really is just another day. Another day in the world, and another day at Shakesville, where I try (and fail, and try again) to be the change I want to see in the world, and to advocate for all women: Black women, brown women, white women, tall women, short women, dwarf women, fat women, thin women, in-betweenie women, trans women, women with disabilities, able-bodied women, old women, young women, girls, women with children, childless women, healthy women, ill women, poor women, rich women, middle class women, employed women, unemployed women, immigrant women, women in every country, English-speaking women, non-English-speaking women, progressive women, conservative women, women in unions, women in comas, straight women, lesbian women, bisexual women, asexual women, powerful women, weak women, vegan woman, vegetarian women, meat-eating women, religious women, atheist women, agnostic women, educated women, uneducated women, women who have survived trauma, women who want my advocacy, women who don't, and/or every other conceivable expression, intersectionality, and experience of womanhood that exists on the planet.
I believe in and fight for women's equality, and I do not expect my sisters who do not share my privileges to wrench apart pieces of their identity in exchange for my alliance. (Nor do I want to be expected by women with privileges I don't share to wrench apart my own identity in service of a false solidarity.) We can't tear ourselves in parts: The female part of me now has equality (happy face!) but the queer part of me doesn't (sad face!).
A person either has equality or she doesn't. And as long as one of my sisters is marginalized on any basis, we have not achieved the goal in which I am interested.
That's an expansive proposition. It can't be addressed in a single day; I can't encapsulate into a blog post what it means for billions of teaspoons to be clattering away, the din of working teaspoons indistinguishable from the reverberating echo of teaspoons that went before and the tintinnabulous promise of teaspoons to come.
I guess my correspondent was expecting fireworks. And all I've got on the day he wanted explosions of colorful grandeur was the tedious daily business of feminism. Yawn.
Let us note with bitter amusement that if more people did the tedious daily business of feminism, International Women's Day might really be a day of celebration, warranting those fireworks.
