Iain and I have a few things we've got to do around the house today, so I'm taking the day off. Happy Presidents' Day, USians!
See you tomorrow!
Blog Note
The Virtual Pub Is Open
[Explanations: lol your fat. pathetic anger bread. hey your gay.]
TFIF, Shakers!
Belly up to the bar,
and name your poison!
Of Course They Did
The House has voted to block federal aid to Planned Parenthood. Nine Democrats joined with the Republicans; tweets Jill Filipovic: "Wanna guess the gender of the 9 Democrats who voted to cut Planned Parenthood's funding? Take a shot in the dark."
This is not about being pro-life. It's not even about being anti-abortion, not when comprehensively funding family planning is the primary means by which to reduce abortions.
This is nothing more than state-sponsored terrorism, in defense of an inherently violent ideology.
Luckily, the Senate is likely to stop this absurdity in its tracks.
Friday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by Shaxco, distributor of Matilda's Fluffballs, for all your cuddling needs.
Recommended Reading:
D-Day: New Mexico Democratic Senator Jeff Bingaman Becomes Latest to Announce Retirement
Andy: Wyoming Senate Passes Anti-Gay Marriage Bill 16-14
Fannie: "Near Tigers In the Zoo" and Other Narratives [TW for sexual violence]
moyazb: Praise the Lorde!
Helen: Call for Submissions for New Trans Art & Lit Magazine
Melissa: Hollywood Hates Emma Watson's Hair
Leave your links in comments...
Daily Dose of Cute
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An Observation
[Trigger warning for rape culture.]
One in six women and one in 33 men will be sexually assaulted in their lifetimes. That's an oft-cited statistic.
It is rarely further contextualized by the fact that many people will be sexually assaulted multiple times during their lives, leading many anti-rape advocates to suspect the actual statistic is even more grim.
Still, there are a lot of people, especially privileged men, who are not even active rape apologists, who greet that 1 in 6/33 statistic with suspicion.
Maybe not consciously. Perhaps their skepticism never forms into a solid thought, ready for contemplative scrutiny.
But the doubt, the denial—it's there.
Because if you agree that sexual assault is wrong, and if believe whole-heartedly that 1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men are being sexually assaulted in your society, you don't do nothing about it.
You Know What You Need?
A trailer from the greatest arm-wrestling movie ever made, Over The Top:
[Video Paraphrase: Stallone. Underdog. Estranged father. Angsty teenaged boy. Mean rich guy. Cheering crowd. Big rig trucks. Stallone. Mean bald guy. "You ain't got a prayer in Vegas!" Mean rich guy. Mean bald guy. Stallone. Angsty teenaged boy. Arm wrestling. Stallone. "Over the top, dad! Over the top!" Hugs. Over the Top: Part 1. (Just kidding.)]
Depressing
On CNN's front page, their current Quick Vote is: What is your general view of labor unions?
Current results: Negative 53%. Positive 27%. Neutral 20%.
This hostility toward collective bargaining is a significant part of the reason we're living in a fucking corporatocracy, where people are overworked and underpaid, wages are stagnant, benefits are waning, unemployment is at 10%, and workers toil in unsafe or exploitative conditions, afraid to report workplace violations, while corporations rake in profits hand over fist.
Unions are considered the enemy, and the Invisible Hand a hero.
Consider this an open thread on the protests in Wisconsin, which are spreading to Indiana and Illinois, as well as a general thread on unions and corporations.
Being an Atheist Doesn't Make You Enlightened
[Trigger warning for misogyny, misogynistic slurs, sexual assault.]
Things of which I am bone-achingly tired: Atheist men* who go around talking ignorant shit about what religion (especially Islam) "does to" women, making universal pronouncements that draw no distinctions between imposed religiosity and chosen religiosity, treating women as a monolith and collectively robbing them of their individual agency (much like imposed religiosity does, ahem), and then acting like that garbage is evidence of fucking enlightenment.
Because of some of the commentary I've read surrounding the world protests, and Lara Logan's sexual assault, this has been on my mind for the past few days, anyway. So when Shaker N forwarded me this thread at the Good Atheist, in which the male author starts out a post by declaring, "Canadians are a bunch of sobbing vaginas (I say this being an actual citizen of the country)," and the thread actually debates whether that's sexist (!), and when I saw these two threads at Pharyngula (doctor, heal thyself), my slow boil boiled right the fuck over.
Yes, it's a real mystery why there aren't more women involved with movement atheism.
Now, personally, I'm not interested in movement atheism for other reasons, anyway, but even were I inclined to evangelize a lack of belief, I would have no interest in associating myself with people who are not merely sexist and inordinately fond of using rape analogies/jokes (for example) to criticize religion, but are also insufferable sanctimonious mansplainers, whom I find every last bit as intolerable to listen to, read, or be around as I do the most strident evangelicals, who have exactly as much respect for me as a woman.
I outgrew a willingness to tolerate the dismissive condescension of men like that in order to be part of a group about a decade ago.
(See also: Why I stopped going to church even before I identified as an atheist.)
If you can't find a way to respect and listen to women, then don't be surprised when very few of them want to be a part of your movement.
And, for the record, if you want to show a willingness to engage with women in good faith, a decent start is not appropriating the burka to use as your flippant symbol, whether you're talking about religious states who legislate laws about women's bodies and choices, or admonishing Western feminists (some of whom, as an aside, are both Western and Muslim!) that they've got nothing to complain about since they're not forced to wear them. Especially if you've never actually spoken to a woman wearing one, or who has ever worn one.
And here's another tip: Rape is not your casual metaphor.
Being an atheist doesn't axiomatically make you enlightened. It doesn't magically erase all the cultural narratives that are strongly associated with religion, and particularly Christianity in the US—the imperialism, the colonialism, the xenophobia, the racism, the homophobia, the transphobia, and the male privilege. (Just for a start.) You've still got to do the hard work of examining your privilege and figuring out how to be a meaningful and effective ally.
If you're interested, here are some Helpful Hints to get you started.
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* This is not to suggest all atheist men do this, or that no atheist women do. I'm referring to a specific but very large and very vocal subset of men in movement atheism. If you are an atheist man who doesn't do this, awesome. If the shoe doesn't fit, don't wear it.
Feel the Trans*-momentum
Massachusetts Transgender Political Coalition:
[Yesterday,] Gov. Deval Patrick signed an historic Executive Order that prohibits discrimination based on gender identity and expression in state employment. It applies to all state agencies in the Executive Branch, including executive offices, boards, commissions, agencies, and departments as well as businesses and organizations that contract with the Executive Branch.
Transgender individuals need equal protections under the law so that they are free to best utilize their skills and experiences, in a way that can only benefit the Commonwealth as a whole.
This Executive Order is a good first step toward that goal. But it’s up to lawmakers to do the rest. Please contact them and ask them to pass An Act Relative to Transgender Equal Rights. And please take a moment to thank Gov. Patrick for his historic move today to bring equality to transgender residents of the Commonwealth.
The MTPC press release contains information for Massachusetts residents wishing to contact their legislators.
Question of the Day
What is your least favorite political euphemism?
There are at least a biebillion of these unholy things, and I loathe just about all of them, but in trying to choose just one as a least favorite, I'm torn between "pro-life" and "social conservative."
Photo of the Day
Hawaii Democratic State Senator Clayton Hee gestures while speaking in favor of the Hawaii Civil Unions Bill at the Hawaii State Capitol Wednesday, Feb. 16, 2011 in Honolulu. The Hawaii Senate voted 18-5 to approve the bill. Hawaii Gov. Neil Abercrombie said if the bill is passed he will sign it into law. [AP Photo]Senator Hee: "There is no denying that by this action, Hawaii takes a significant step towards true equality."
I wish we could see a few national Democrats look as passionate in their support of marriage equality as Senator Hee does.
I'm looking at you, Mr. President.
Feel the Trans*-momentum: Burnaby Now Editorial
Just a little one today, a followup to last week's FtTm post. The campaign continues to get Bill C-389 past the Canadian Senate, so that it can move to Royal Assent and become law.
A friend of mine pointed me to this editorial, by the editorial staff at the Burnaby Now (Burnaby being a part of the greater Vancouver area, on the coast of British Columbia, north of Washington state), excerpted here:
Will Canada's senators stand up and do the right thing - ensure that transgendered folks receive protection?I hope our Senators/Sénateurs are listening (although let me also note: Dear Editors, thank you for your editorial. We generally prefer "transgender", rather than "transgendered".). If you know of other media which have posted positive editorials, articles, videos, podcasts, or anything else citable about the campaign for C-389, please give us links in the comments.
-=-=-
We hope the Senate passes the bill - it is the right thing to do.
I`m feeling less cynical than I did last time, so I'll give you the links to the Canadian Senators' e-mail directory to get you started.
Senators in English
Sénateurs en français
Canadians and canadien(ne)s are encouraged to write to any Senator they feel like writing to. Letters to Senators, as with MPs and MPPs/MLAs/MNAs, are postage-free.
-=-=-
Also, re: the asterisk after "trans": I'm using this to be as inclusive as possible, as is always my goal at Shakesville. The intent is to have a wildcard after trans, so as to show we're not just talking about unidirectional binary transitions, but also genderqueer, third gender, neutrois/neuter/neutral, and a variety of other commonly-seen-as-transgressive gender identities/presentations. While the simpler "trans people" or "trans women" would easily include my own identity, I've had e-mails suggesting that a slightly wider usage might allow for greater inclusivity, and I understand and agree with their logic. Whether or not you or anyone else choose to use it is entirely up to you and/or them, but whether I use it is not open to discussion here.
Tip of the CaitieCap to my friend J.
Random Blub
Description: Brooklynites Danny, an OTB clerk, and Annie, a nurse, remember their life together—from their first date to Danny's final days with terminal cancer. This remarkable couple personifies the eloquence, grace, and poetry that can be found in the voices of every day people if we take the time to listen. Originally an animation in two parts, here you'll see a special version that combines both parts of their story.
[Note: Posting this is not an endorsement of every single thing they say]
Transcript and more on Danny and Annie below.
The StoryCorps oral history project has dedicated its booth in Grand Central Terminal to the Perasas. On Friday, Feb. 10, a plaque was unveiled that dedicated the booth to the Perasas.From the article: Two in a Million: Danny And Annie Perasa.
The plaque reads: "This booth is dedicated to Danny and Annie Perasa, who recorded their story here on January 6, 2004. Their humor, heart, eloquence and love will never be forgotten."
[StoryCorps intro music.
Text on screen:
Danny and Annie live in Brooklyn, New York. He is a horse-betting clerk. She is a nurse.
They were married in 1978. And at StoryCorps, they told the story of their very first date.
---
Danny: She started to talk and I said, 'Listen, I'm going to deliver a speech and at the end you're going to wanna go home'. I said, 'You represent a four letter word and that word is love. I say if we're goin' anywhere, we're goin' down the aisle because I'm too tired, too sick, and too sore to do any other damn thing.' Aaand she turned around and she says, 'Of course I'll marry ya'.
And the next morning I called her as early as I possibly could --
Annie: And he always gets up early.
Danny: (laughing) To...To make sure she hadn't changed her mind. And she hadn't. And, uh, and every year on April twenty-second around three o'clock I call her and ask her if she'd do it again, and so far the answer's been the same.
Annie: Yeah and twenty-five times, yes. (laughs)
DannyY-y-you see, the thing of it is, I always feel guilty when I say 'I love you' to you. When I say it so often, I say it to remind you that as dumpy as I am, it's coming from me. It's like hearing a beautiful song from a busted ol' radio. And it's nice of you to keep the radio around the house.
Annie: If I don't have a note on the kitchen table, I think there's something wrong. You write a love letter to me --
Danny: Well the only thing that could possibly be wrong is that I couldn't find a silly pen.
Annie: (reading one of Danny's letters) 'To my Princess,
The weather out today is extremely rainy. I'll call you at 11:20 in the morning...
Danny: It's a romantic weather report...
Annie ... and I love you, I love you, I love you.'
Danny When a guy is happily married, no matter what happens at work, no matter what happens in the rest of the day, there's a shelter when you get home. There's a knowledge that you can hug somebody without them throwing you down stairs and saying 'get your hands off me'. And...and bein' married is like havin' a color television set--you never wanna go back to black and white.
---
Text on screen:
Danny and Annie spent twenty-seven happy years together. Then, in January of 2006, Danny was diagnosed with a fast-spreading terminal cancer.
A few weeks later, Danny and Annie recorded one last interview together from the living room of their Brooklyn home.
---
Annie: The illness is not hard on me. It's just, you know, the finality of it. And him, he goes along like a trooper.
Danny: Listen, even downhill a car doesn't roll unless it's pushed. And you're givin' me a great push. The deal of it is we try to give each other hope--and not hope that I'll live--hope that she'll do well after I pass. Hope that people will support her. Hope that if she meets somebody and likes him, that she marries him.
Annie: He has everything planned. Y'know... (voice fades out)
Danny: I'm workin' on her. She said that it was her call. She wants to walk out behind the casket alone. I guess that's the way to do it because when we were married, you know how your bother takes you down, your father takes you down? She said, 'Well, I don't know which of my brothers to walk in with, I don't want to offend anybody.' I says, 'I got a solution.' I said, 'You walk in with me, you walk out with me.'
And the other day I said, 'Who is going to walk down the aisle with you behind the casket?'. You know, to support her. And she said, 'Nobody. I walked in with you alone. I'm walking out with you alone.'.
Annie: Mmmhmm.
Danny: There's a thing in life where you have to come to terms with dying. Well, I haven't come to terms with dyin' yet. I want to come to terms with being sure that you understand that my love for you up to this point was as much as it could be and it will be as much as it could be for eternity.
I always said the only thing I have to give you is a poor gift and it's myself. And I always gave it. And if there's a way to come back and give it, I'll do that too. You have the Valentine's Day letter there?
Annie: Yeah. (reading the letter) My dearest wife,
This is a very special day, it is a day on which we share our love which still grows after all these years. Now that love is being used by us to sustain us through these hard times. All my love, all my days, and more...Happy Valentine's Day.
Danny:(choked up)I could write on and on about her. She lights up the room in the morning when she tells me to put both hands on her shoulders so she can support me. She lights up my life when she says to me at night, 'Would you like ice cream?' or 'Would you please drink more water?'. I mean, those aren't very romantic things to say, but they stir my heart.
In my mind, in my heart, there has never been, there is not now, and never will be another Annie.
---
Text on screen:
A week after this conversation was recorded, StoryCorps broadcast it on public radio.
Danny died that same day.
Annie received thousands of condolence letters from radio listeners.
She reads one every day in place of her love letter from Danny.]
