Actor James Van Der Beek sits at a desk, typing on a laptop. He looks up at the camera, then begins to speak. Hi, I'm actor James Van Der Beek. If you're under the age of 20, odds are good you know me best from a five-second clip of me crying that's circulating the internet. Infamous gif appears. Yep, that's me on "Dawson's Creek" in a scene with Katie Holmes, where her character dumps mine. You know, the more I saw it in internet comment sections mocking the sadness of others, the more I realized what he internet was really demanding: More intense emotional close-ups of my face.
So, I started a website! You can find short clips of me emoting dozens of other feelings at jamesvandermemes.com. The original clip is still there, of course, BUT digitally restored and remastered.
But what if you're not sad? What if you just watched an adorable cat video and you're giddy to share it? Post my new "happy" clip in the comment window to show everyone just how elated you are. "Happy" gif appears. Sometimes you need a good eyeroll to go with the latest Lindsay Lohan story. "LiLo Eye roll" gif appears. Things getting uncomfortable on your friend's blog? No bette way to say, "Awwwkwaaard!" than with this clip. "Awkward" gif appears.
We've got dozens of intense emotional clips fitting for any internet post. There's "Mild Sadness," "Super Sad Sobbing," "10 Year Anniversary Crying Edition," "Sheer Panic," "Nostalgia," "Double Take," "Eager Beaver," "Dramatic Dawson," "The O-Face"—that's for you, ladies—and many, many more.
Long on to jamesvandermemes.com today, and show the world what kind of vanderfeeling YOU'RE having.
The state of Kentucky/Kentucky Tourism Development Finance Authority has given preliminary approval for $43 million in tax incentives to be used to fund _________?
If you said: "Ark Encounter, the theme park that is all about how people and dinosaurs lived together in the mesolithic (or is it neolithic) time based on particular biblical interpretations." -- you win 10,000 clams*.
On Dec. 20 the Kentucky Tourism Development Finance Authority gave preliminary approval for up to $43 million in tax incentives to help fund an attraction in Grant County based on the Genesis story of Noah's ark.
Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear is an enthusiastic supporter of Ark Encounter, the 800-acre park that will tell how men and dinosaurs co-existed less than 10,000 years ago according to one interpretation of biblical texts.
Ark Encounter is the brain child of Answers in Genesis, the Christian organization behind the Creation Museum, a popular creationist-oriented destination in the state. The developer says the park will generate 900 jobs and 1.9 million tourists a year. Taxpayers will be on the hook for 25 percent of the total cost, but only after the park is finished and begins to reach its performance goals.
Apparently an economic analysis has to be done--by an independent group and paid for by the developer--before final approval is given. It has to meet certain criteria as set out by a '96 tourism law. Ok. Tourism and jobs = important. Understandable. But. But. Seriously now. This apparently is a really out there suggestion, so prepare yourself: there might be other things that Kentucky might want to focus on that $43 million worth of incentives could help. Things which are not religious-based, anti-science propaganda. Just maybe.
"A coalfields native who scraped by working in restaurants and convenience stores, Ms. Bonds was equivocal about the risks of mining until the 1990s, when the A.T. Massey Coal Co. arrived in Marfork hollow, one of the narrow, green valleys that wind through the Appalachian Mountains in southern West Virginia."
"Massey had planned a dam farther up Marfork hollow - an impoundment that would hold millions of gallons of coal sludge. Her family would be in danger if the dam failed, and such dams had failed before - including in 1972 at Buffalo Creek, W.Va., where 125 people were killed in the toxic flood."
"When she heard her grandson concocting escape plans in the event of a dam break, Ms. Bonds - the last holdout in Marfork - knew that it was time to move and time to call attention to the threats of mountaintop mining to clean air, clean water and the Appalachian way of life."
"'If coal is so good for us hillbillies,' she said at a 2008 Appalachian Studies Association conference, 'then why are we so poor?'"
[Trigger warning for transphobia and diminishing the gravity of sexual assault.]
So I'm looking at Yahoo's News Photos page, and discover the below strip featuring the top photos in the "Odd News" section, which, as I have written many times previously, typically includes content that equates gender-based violence with stories of water-skiing squirrels or other inane crap:
On the left, an image of what appears to be a female midwife's hand examining the belly of a pregnant woman (likely in labor), which is being used to represent the following story: "A Finnish doctor who said he sucked a patient's nipple in line with an old midwives' diagnostic trick has been fined for subjecting the 20-year-old woman to a 'sexual act', a court said Wednesday."
That story is neither "odd" in the sense that it's rare (sexual abuse of patients by doctors is not, unfortunately, uncommon), nor in the sense that it's quirky or amusing. It doesn't belong in the Odd News at all, no less with this image.
In the middle, pictures about picnicking with a polar bear and potty-training pigs.
On the right, an image of the male and female gender symbols, which is being used to represent a story about a couple who are trans, one of whose daughters is also trans. The actual article is headlined: It's in the genes, suggests Czech transsexual 'family'. Scare quotes original, obviously.
This is the detritus of our continued marginalization. Being sexually assaulted is kooky. People who are trans are zany. Just so much fodder for the "Odd News."
And I'm also clever enough to know that it is the pervasive, ubiquitous, inescapable little things that create the foundations of the rape culture and institutional transphobia on which the big stuff is dependent for its survival. It's the little things, the constant drumbeat of inequality and objectification, that inure us to increasingly horrible acts and attitudes perpetrated against marginalized people.
Irrespective of intent, the recommendation to "ignore the little stuff," so often intertwined with accusations of looking for things about which to get offended, is not just ill-advised, but counter to the ultimate goal of full equality. The little stuff, like the Odd News, is the fertile soil in which everything else takes root and from whence everything else springs, the way that fundamental ideas like sexual assault is funny and people who are trans are less than are conveyed over and over and over again.
I object to that.
Asking me to not care is to ask me to participate in my own marginalization and the marginalization of people I love, which I am unwilling to do.
Yesterday, NPR ran two stories on the spectacle that is the moderate wing of the Democratic Party.
My favorite part was the sound bite from Jim Kessler of the think tank Third Way, who represents the direction the White House is (still) going. [Spoiler alert: the third way is a lot like the other two, only more condescending.]:
"With the passage of health care reform, the 80-year Democratic quest to build the best possible safety net is essentially over... and the Democratic Party has to shift from being a party primarily concerned with economic security and dividing up the pie to one that is primarily concerned with economic growth and expanding the pie."
I have to say, this is my favorite quote of the Obama administration thus far. It is telling.
Anyhoo, now that there aren't any folks in the US being left behind (certainly not this guy), it's totes time to get back to making money, which benefits everyone.
First, lol this guy's understanding of economics.
Second, has this guy been to America lately? He's more than welcome to visit my neighborhood. We could window shop for used tires and used mattresses, and check to see if anyone's left out any returnables.
If you're reading, Mr. Kessler, when you get to Syracuse on the thruway, you want to exit at the abandoned air conditioner factory. You can't miss it-- it's right between the abandoned transmission plant and the abandoned General Motors complex. If you don't want people riffling your car, I suggest you come during the daytime.
President Obama is reportedly considering former Commerce Secretary William Daley for a position in the West Wing — possibly chief of staff. That would signal the administration's intent to court moderate voters and the business community.
Daley, who was commerce secretary under President Clinton, is on the board of a Washington think tank called Third Way, that advocates for centrist policies.
Super!
And then there's Gene Sperling, a possible candidate to replace Larry Summers (remember: Summers left-- Obama *didn't* fire him) as Obama's top economic advisor:
I thought there was a dearth of people who accepted the inevitability of globalization, the inevitability and power of markets, and yet who still believe there was a role for government to make sure that a rising tide was lifting all boats.
Ok, I LOL'd for REALZ at that.
Inevitability...markets...inevitability...markets..."lifting all boats"??? Sure. Why the hell not?
I actually agree that markets are powerful. I'm not sure precisely how successful the government can be in harnessing the market to make everyone better off, but that's my problem. What's interesting, is that if we are going to try that tactic (hint: we are), I'd argue that we should probably have someone who's not running the markets doing the harnessing. Just sayin'. Repeatedly. For emphasis. Lots of emphasis. :ahem:
David Leonhardt makes The Blade sound almost scarily reasonable, by omitting all of his catastrophic failures. It's all well and good to hear a Republican talk about investing in infrastructure, but letting Daniels wax patriotic about building roads without mentioning his penchant for privatizing them is just irresponsible journalism.
Frankly, a profile of Daniels that doesn't even contain the word "privatize" is dishonest. It is his defining characteristic as governor.
And despite the glowing whitewash that surrounds it, this is really the only passage that accurately reflects his governorship:
Shortly before taking office, he gathered his staff in an Indianapolis hotel and told them that their No. 1 goal was lifting the per capita disposable income of the state's residents. Instead, income growth in Indiana has trailed growth nationwide and in every bordering state but Michigan.
That paragraph arrives third from last in the entire piece.
Which is reflective of the national coverage of Daniels: He's frequently lauded as a great Republican governor with grand ideas, without much emphasis on the reality that his grand ideas don't work.
He's used Indiana as his testing ground and met failure, yet, inexplicably, the national media seems keen to help give him a chance to try again with the whole country.
So they're giving him the John McCain treatment: Rewriting him as a maverick who isn't constrained by party ideology, even though he's a textbook conservative who deviates from dogma cravenly, only when it's politically expedient. And, like McCain, he's no patriot; he's just a corporatist who fervently believes that the private sector holds all the answers, despite all evidence to the contrary.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs is leaving the White House. But only in his capacity as Press Secretary. Gibbs "will step down and become an outside political adviser to the president and his re-election campaign." Not surprising, since he was an integral part of Obama's election campaign the first time around.
I'll really miss all the hippie-punching, though. *single tear*
This weekend, I played some Rock Band, watched some football, and roller skated. In that order.
10-year-old Kathryn Aurora Gray of Fredericton, New Brunswick discovered a supernova. Which is approximately fifty kerfuffletillion times cooler than anything involving Whitesnake and a plastic guitar.
“Kathryn pointed to the screen and said: ‘Is this one?’ I said yup, that looks pretty good,” said Paul Gray, describing his daughter’s find.
“It’s fantastic that someone so young would be passionate about astronomy. What an incredible discovery. We’re all very excited,” said Deborah Thompson, executive director of the Royal Astronomical Society of Canada.
The Obama administration, reversing course, will revise a Medicare regulation to delete references to end-of-life planning as part of the annual physical examinations covered under the new health care law, administration officials said Tuesday.
The move is an abrupt shift, coming just days after the new policy took effect on Jan. 1.
Many doctors and providers of hospice care had praised the regulation, which listed "advance care planning" as one of the services that could be offered in the "annual wellness visit" for Medicare beneficiaries.
While administration officials cited procedural reasons for changing the rule, it was clear that political concerns were also a factor. The renewed debate over advance care planning threatened to become a distraction to administration officials who were gearing up to defend the health law against attack by the new Republican majority in the House.
Literally, the Obama administration just caved to GOP framing because the GOP is going after his healthcare plan, and instead of standing their ground, in fear of Sarah Palin screaming, "Death panels!" again, they dropped the regulation, despite the millions of people it may have helped.
There is certainly an argument to be made that conceding one "controversial" component to save the rest of the legislation is "smart politics." But that argument is contingent on ignoring the reality that the GOP will just find something else to wildly misrepresent and mendaciously use to undermine the legislation.
This wasn't a move of strength. It was a move of weakness. The battle hasn't even begun, and the Dems are already losing.
Shaker FilthyGrandeur sent me this screencap announcing the break-up of two successful and well-known young actors:
"Culkin Splits From Longtime Girlfriend"
"Longtime Girlfriend" Mila Kunis is one of the stars of a little movie you may have heard of called Black Swan, which is one of the most successful films currently playing in theaters.
Kunis also starred in the hugely popular sitcom That '70s Show for eight years and has been in numerous films, including the wildly successful (ugh) Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Culkin, whose work in smaller films I quite like and am not intending to diminish, has not been in a box office hit since Ri¢hie Ri¢h in 1994. Yet he is still considered The Star, and she his (former) property.
For perspective, think how strange it would be if Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher split, and the headline read: "Moore splits from husband."
[Trigger warning for sexual assault, which applies to both links]
[Link includes descriptions of sexual assault] Associated Press:
"Two massage therapists sued Brett Favre on Monday, saying they lost them their part-time jobs with the New York Jets after complaining about sexually suggestive text messages from the veteran quarterback."
This is a significant (and totally unsurprising) development, in that the allegations involve some pretty serious wrongdoing on the part of the Jets.
"The NFL also reviewed media reports that Favre pursued two massage therapists who worked at the Jets' facility in 2008, but the league said that claim could not be substantiated because people with 'potentially relevant information' wouldn't cooperate with investigators. O'Toole's and Scavo's lawyer, David Jaroslawicz, said he told investigators about the information his clients had."
Maybe if the NFL won't find something rotten with the NFL, the courts will.
"I think one of the biggest misconceptions when we talk about obesity in general is that obese people are obese largely because of their lifestyles and because of the way that they live," Dr. Arya Sharma of the University of Alberta, told CBC News. [Sharma is the chair of obesity research and management at the University of Alberta and medical director of the Weight Wise program at Edmonton's Royal Alexandra Hospital.]
Sharma points to studies where people's eating and activity are carefully monitored. They show that some people can eat an additional 1,000 calories per day and not gain a gram, while others would gain five to six kilograms over a six-week period.
"There's a huge variability in how people can cope with extra calories," he said in an interview with CBC News.
He says people who tend to pack on the pounds simply have bodies that burn calories very efficiently and store the excess as fat. "They just take their extra calories, they don't even burn them because they're very fuel efficient, they'll just store those calories and they'll put them away."
..."Some people are just naturally lean. They can have crappy lifestyles and it doesn't seem to affect them."
..."We keep hammering home the stereotype of the fat, lazy slobs who are eating fast food all the time who are not moving, not exercising or not taking care of themselves, making poor choices, when there's very little science that actually backs this up."
Sharma notes there are all sorts of benefits for the body to exercising and eating healthfully (if one is able), but that weight loss simply isn't one of them for many people.
Gee, that sounds suspiciously like what lots of fat people have been saying about their own bodies and lives and realities for years!
[H/T to Shakers Sarah and Wondering. Reminder: That many people don't choose to be fat does not render choosing to be fat an invalid choice. It is a valid choice.]
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