Barry Manilow: "Mandy"
The Overton Window: Chapter Nine
Well, this is a disappointment. "Being between tans, Noah had opted to change his clothes in private." I know, I know! You were all looking forward to Noah disrobing in front of Molly. That'll have to wait.
The restroom at the Stars 'n Stripes reeks of weed, and Noah speculates that maybe the "single-issue hemp-heads ... were here to attach their cause to the larger group's ambitions." Noah knows what the group's ambitions are? Because I sure as hell don't. Not in this novel, not in real life.
Noah returns to the pub and engages in behaviour he knows is "a little creepy": He spies on Molly and her new table-mate from across the crowded pub. (Nevermind that earlier the pub was described as being so crowded "it was impossible to keep to a straight line as he walked," now it's clear enough to ogle his date from across the room.) Hollis (the Winnie the Pooh guy) has gone and a new man is sitting at the table with Molly.
They were sitting close together, hand on hand, talking and whispering, intent on one another, each finishing thoughts for the other, laughing easily. It was an intimate relaxation between them, a togetherness without any pretense, the kind of closeness you see only rarely between siblings, and sometimes among old friends, but often between two people in love.
Uh oh. Noah's getting jealous.
Hollis appears next to Noah, busting his creepy spy routine. There's a short conversation. Noah zeroes in on Hollis' accent (Appalachian) as the man offers up some exposition. The guy at the table is Danny Bailey. Noah pretends he doesn't care about Molly. The author repeatedly mentions Hollis' hulking frame. (Will that be important later?) Lastly, Hollis says "To be honest I don't know that much about him. But he scares me some."
Oh my!
Noah returns to the table and meets Danny.
If the twinkle in his deep voice was any indication, Bailey found himself pretty damned amusing. He had the air of someone who was accustomed to being seen from a stage or on camera and had put his look together accordingly. He was handsome enough, but up close you could see all the things the footlights would obscure.
In my mind, Danny is played by Stephen Baldwin. (Again courtesy of Joe Mande.) That doesn't mean you have to imagine him as Stephen Baldwin. But in all honesty, it's something I often do: casting famous people as characters in books. When I read Harry Potter, Neville Longbottom looked just like Sal Mineo in my head.There is a silly conversation between Noah and Danny, the highlights of which I will share now:
"So, you must be Noah. Molly's told me almost nothing about you."
"I'm not surprised. We hardly know each other, and what she knows so far, I doubt she likes too much."
"Here's to new friends, and maybe a new fan."
"I'm sorry, you said a new fan?"
"Don't tell me you haven't seen the video."
Noah blinked, and shook his head.
"Overthrow, man, the video. It's gonna bring on the total downfall of the whole frickin' evil empire, thirty-five million views on YouTube. That's me. I'm shocked, you really haven't seen it? There's e-mails about me flying around all over the Internet."
"Well, I guess I've got a really good spam filter."
For a long moment the legendary Danny Bailey looked like he'd just been double-smacked across his face with the ceremonial dueling gloves.
"Down, boys," Molly said.
If you remember, back in chapter one, I joked about the inevitable Youtube reference that would pop up. Here it is. Not only that, but we have a veritable Youtube star in our novel. God damn if this book isn't timely and relevant!
Danny downs a couple shots and runs to the stage. Molly explains that "Danny's a good guy, he's just living in the past of this movement." Again with the nebulous "movement." Maybe I was supposed to ready Dick Armey's Teabagger Manifesto before picking up The Overton Window. Molly continues:
"You'll see what I mean when he speaks tonight. He doesn't have much of a BS-filter, and he gets people fired up about the wrong things, when there are plenty of real things to fight against. But, there's no denying he gets a lot of attention."
Then Molly and Noah get their eHarmony moment and tell each other something the other doesn't know about them.
"I have an almost supernatural ability to tell when a person is hiding something."
"No, you don't."
"I do. While the other kids went to Cub Scouts I was sitting behind one-way glass eating M&Ms and watching about a million focus groups. I know people." He thumped his temple with an index finger. "Human lie detector."
M&Ms! For authenticity! Right? I don't know. What an odd little fact to drop into the text. It fits, I guess, since everything about the writing is strange.
Noah identifies someone in the crowd, "an infiltrator," who doesn't belong. Oh, yeah, it gets better. Or worse, depending:
Molly nodded, took a deep breath, and then climbed up to stand on the seat of her stool and shouted across the bar. "Hey, you!" She pointed to the man in question, who had turned to face her along with most of those nearby. "Enjoying the show, are you? Look, everybody! We've got a Benedict Arnold in the house!"
Oh, that Molly Ross! What a firebrand! What a scamp! "I can sometimes be a little impulsive," she tells Noah.
Oh yes, he is definitely going to fall for her now, isn't he? He already did in chapter one, but now he's really, really in love.
30 Rock Thinks Rape Is Hilarious
[Trigger warning for sexual assault, spousal abuse, clergy abuse.]
Several people emailed me or mentioned in comments that last night's episode of 30 Rock, which was the season five premiere, contained a rape joke/scene of rape. I don't normally watch the show, so I didn't see it—but I watched the whole episode in its entirely on Hulu this morning, and there was not one, but three rape jokes in it.
1. At 2:12: Jack (Alec Baldwin): "In order for this merger to stay attractive to our friends at CableTown, we have to seem like a sexy, profitable company—and we're almost pulling it off. The Harry Potter theme park is huge hit with both anglophiles and pedophiles."
2. At 12:45: Pete (Scott Adsit): "This Jenna promotion is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. Do you understand how much free time I have now? Yesterday, I went to the gym. And, this morning, I made love to my wife. And she was still asleep, so I didn't have to be gentle." [Cut to a sleeping woman being raped by her husband, from his perspective, but it's hilarious because she's fat and her boobs are bouncing around and she's snoring.] Liz (Tina Fey): "That is one of the most upsetting things I have ever imagined." Pete: "Are you sure? Think about it again." [Cut to the scene of the woman being raped again.] Liz: "Yes!" (TW: Shaker Andy emailed this gif that breaks down the scene.)
3. At 19:00: Liz says to her boyfriend Carol (Matt Damon): "How do we move this forward in the time allotted?" Carol says, "All right, let's each say one thing about ourselves that the other person doesn't know, on the count of three. All right, ready? One, two, three." Liz says: "I'm on a waiting list to adopt a kid," while Carol says, "Touched by a priest; it's fine."
It's #2 that people are talking about this morning, because it actually depicts the rape, no less from the rapist's perspective. But it's also bookended by two jokes about child rape.
I don't even know what to say anymore.
[Rape is Hilarious: Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen, Twenty, Twenty-One, Twenty-Two, Twenty-Three, Twenty-Four, Twenty-Five, Twenty-Six, Twenty-Seven, Twenty-Eight, Twenty-Nine, Thirty, Thirty-One, Thirty-Two, Thirty-Three, Thirty-Four, Thirty-Five, Thirty-Six, Thirty-Seven, Thirty-Eight, Thirty-Nine, Forty, Forty-One, Forty Two, Forty-Three, Forty-Four, Forty-Five, Forty-Six, Forty-Seven, Forty-Eight, Forty-Nine, Fifty, Fifty-One, Fifty-Two, Fifty-Three, Fifty-Four.]
Assvertising
[Trigger warning for fat hatred, dehumanization, objectification, and violence.]
Diesel is the latest brand to become a repeat offender in this series (thanks to Shaker Sara for passing this along):
The ad, titled "Diesel Kick Ass Sneakers Study #7," shows a foot clad in a Diesel Sneaker kicking a fat female ass, clad in a cheek-bearing leotard, in slow motion. An onscreen digital clock then counts the seconds while the ass jiggles from the kick. 21:03. Text onscreen: "Results: Diesel Sneakers deliver more A.W.S. (Ass Wobbling per Second) than any other sneaker. Diesel Sneakers. Not made for running. (Great for kicking asses.)"This ad would be contemptible enough on its own (for a host of reasons I'm not going to waste my time delineating), but it's even worse when juxtaposed against this current Diesel print ad:
If you can't see the image, it's a Diesel ad featuring a picture of a thin white man kneeling down and biting a thin white woman's jeans-clad ass. (Her head is, naturally, cropped out of the image.) The text reads: "You'll Eat Better."
So: Fat ladies' asses are for kicking. Thin ladies' asses are for biting. Okay.
[Assvertising: Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100, 101, 102, 103, 104 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 110, 111, 112, 113, 114, 115, 116, 117, 118, 119, 120, 121.]
Discussion Thread: Let's Talk About Sex, Part Two
In yesterday's "How to Fuck" thread, Shaker Jon_Erikson brought up a question about how to have a discussion with a sex partner about frequency without being indirectly coercive.
Lots of conversations with partners about sex can be fraught for the same reasons: Discussions about frequency, about the time of day you prefer having sex, about the ways you like have sex, about fetishes.
And conversations with children about sex can be fraught for other reasons altogether. It's also one of the most frequent subjects about which I get emails soliciting advice and/or good reading materials.
So, this is a thread to talk about how to have conversations about sex.
"How do I talk to my partner about wanting more/less sex?"
"What should we do when I like sex at night and zie likes it in the morning?"
"How do other people navigate one partner's natural lulls in sex drive?"
"How do I introduce the subject of sex to young children in an age-appropriate way?"
"How do I talk to my kids about sex without being heterocentrist?"
"How to I broach the subject with older kids on the cusp of sexual experimentation without alienating them?"
This thread is about sex-related communications. The thread about the physical aspects of sex is here.
Discussion Thread: Let's Talk About Sex, Part One
The last two days, we've done Questions of the Day about masturbation, and, in both threads, there were "Is this normal?"/"I didn't realize lots of people did that!" discussions.
Sex is one of those subjects about which it's tough to get good information as a kid, and, then, seemingly overnight, one may start feeling "too old" to not know the answers to lingering questions, presuming to ask them at this age will elicit laughter and mockery, that the people asked will think you're a rube, or don't know your own body, or are (horrors!) bad in bed, or some other conclusion that makes you wish you'd just kept your mouth shut.
So, this is a thread for all those questions, free of judgment.
"Is X normal?"
"Have other people experienced Y?"
"Is it weird that I like Z?"
This thread is about the physical aspects of sex. The thread about sex-related communications is here.
Question of the Day
[Photo credit: Destination360 Old Faithful]
Following up on yesterday's QOTD: What's the weirdest place you've ever masturbated?
Quote of the Day
"How start?"—A bullet-point in "a newly declassified document that details talking points that emerged from a meeting between Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld and CENTCOM Commander General Tommy Franks in November 2001." The bullet-point was followed by suggestions on how to start the Iraq War.
Um, yeah.
Too bad cooking a case for war out of thin air isn't a war crime, huh?
Photos of the Day
WINNER: Getty Images, whose photographer captured and whose photo editor wisely chose to distribute this great shot of "Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton as she spoke about United Nations Peacekeeping Forces in a Security Council meeting during the United Nations General Assembly September 23, 2010 at UN headquarters in New York."
LOSER: Reuters Pictures, whose photographer captured and whose photo editor sadly chose to distribute this tiresome reminder that HILLARY CLINTON IS A LADY WHO DOES LADY THINGS.
Yes, we know. We know, we know, we know. We know.
Funny how I never see any wire images of David Cameron adjusting his nuts in the shadows before he takes the stage, as it were.
Whack-a-Hippie
Wow. Just wow.
I love how it's the responsibility of bloggers to not make the administration's job harder by withholding criticism. Um, excuse me, but no one is more ridiculously (and unjustifiably) critical of the Obama administration than the Republican Party, to whom the White House responds with pandering, capitulation, and loving serenades to bipartisanship.
Not testy scolding to get in line.
For the record, I was not invited to participate in this conference call. That's the sort of thing I used to be invited to, but not anymore. Not by this administration.
Today's Edition of "Conniving and Sinister"
See Deeky's archive of all previous Conniving & Sinister strips here.
[In which Liss reimagines the long-running comic "Frank & Ernest," about two old straight white guys "telling it like it is," as a fat feminist white woman (Liss) and a biracial queerbait (Deeky) telling it like it actually is from their perspectives. Hilarity ensues.]
How to Fuck
1. Find a consenting partner (or partners).
2. Get your partner/s' explicit consent. Give your explicit consent. Compliance is not the same as consent. Your partner/s should be as excited and ready as you are. Don't try to talk anyone else, or yourself, into fucking.
3. Use whatever combination of prophylactics (condom, dental dam, etc.) and birth control (condom, the pill, Today Sponge, etc.) you need to prevent the transmission of disease and/or pregnancy (unless you're trying to get pregnant).
4. Do whatever feels good for you and your partner/s. Communicate as you go to make sure your partner/s is/are still feeling safe and having fun. There's no one right way to fuck—and exploration, even and maybe especially when it's awkward, is part of the joy of fucking.
5. Rinse and repeat. As often as feels right to you and your partner/s.
[For some reason, "how to fuck" is perennially a search term that brings people to Shakesville. Currently, the results bring searchers to Portly Dyke's How to Fuck Up post, which is good universal reading, but I thought it might be nice to provide a post that offered the instructions for which people are actually searching, too.]
Fair & Balanced
Shaker Zes sent me this video her friend took as they were passing the News Corp. building in NYC (News Corp. is Rupert Murdoch's media company that owns Fox):
Male Voiceover: Here we are at the News Corporation building, where everything is fair and balanced. [The camera pans down the front of the building, to the ground story windows in which are hung banners advertising Fox News Channel's various shows. The shot tracks right, revealing each new banner, as the voiceover continues.] We're looking at the ads for Fox Business, err, Fox News Channel, excuse me—and, ah, there's Fox & Friends, and America's Newsroom. Then we have a bunch of men—big, powerful-sounding last names like Cavuto! Beck! Baier! Smith! O'Reilly! Hannity! And then we have a woman, who doesn't get a last name: She's simply…Greta. Fair and balanced. Number one.Before anyone gets the idea to argue that maybe "Van Susteren" couldn't fit on the banner, there is a banner right beside hers reading "Fair & Balanced" all on one line, so that argument's a nonstarter.
This is so the worst thing you're going to read all day.
Actual headline: Forget the tea party, what about the crumpets?
Actual subhead: Everybody knows some poor fool who married a woman like Christine O'Donnell or Michele Bachmann.
Actual lede: "To the connoisseur of American political theater, the most entertaining aspect of the 2010 election season has been the rise of the right-wing cuties -- political celebrities whose main qualification is looking terrific on television. From where I sit, in a comfortable chair in front of the tube, the GOP Cupcake Factor has enlivened an otherwise dreary campaign season."
Actual location of this article: Salon.
Whoops your progressive media got rank misogyny all up in it.
Not to mention a dose of disablism: Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann, and Christine O'Donnell aren't "crazy"—they're just assholes. And I shouldn't need to point out to someone as smart as Gene Lyons that there is a rich tradition of trying to marginalize and demonize women by calling them mentally ill, or hysterical, or "unhinged."
Just because they're women one doesn't like who promulgate policies with which one disagrees doesn't make it acceptable—i.e. not misogynistic—to invoke one of the most recognizable silencing strategies used against powerful women for all of documented history.
And, for the record, this shit isn't new. These conservative ladies are hiking a trail blazed by the loathsome Phyllis Schlafly before I was even born. She might not have held elected office, but this path was first forged in the footsteps she left marching against the ERA. She ain't known as the First Lady of Conservatism for nothing.
Disappearing her, and the conservative women who have followed her, in order to treat Palin, Bachmann, and O'Donnell as some new trend in conservative fuckery, isn't exactly feminist, either.
Oh, the irony.
Yeah, I know none of these ladies would piss on me if I were on fire, but, as I've said many times before, I will continue to defend Sarah Palin et. al. against misogynist smears not because I endorse her or her politics, but because that's how feminism works.
But I'd prefer not to be obliged in the first place.
[H/T to Shaker wisiti. Related Reading: Vanity Unfair, Same Boat; Grab a Paddle, Sarah Palin Sexism Watch, Part 28, On Choice, Parity for Palin.]
Today in OFFS.
Just a bit ago I checked my Twitter feed and saw this:
Naturally I was a bit curious as to why Sesame Street was releasing a "statement". That always sounds ominous, doesn't it? I'm vaguely aware of Katy Perry, mostly because of her first (that I know of) apparent hit "I Kissed A Girl" and because that had nothing to do with the version of of the song that I'm familiar with.
I am much more aware of Sesame Street, of course, both because I watched it as a kid and I've watched it here and there for the past ten years due to my own kids watching it. One thing I've always liked about the show was the pairing of musicians and the show with the artists rewriting their songs to fit in a segment for the show. You know, perhaps I can blame Sesame Street for my love of covers and mash-ups...but I digress... So Katy Perry + Sesame Street = Need For Statement. Hmmm.
So I clicked over to read the statement:
Sesame Street has a long history of working with celebrities across all genres, including athletes, actors, musicians and artists. Sesame Street has always been written on two levels, for the child and adult. We use parodies and celebrity segments to interest adults in the show because we know that a child learns best when co-viewing with a parent or care-giver. We also value our viewer’s opinions and particularly those of parents. In light of the feedback we’ve received on the Katy Perry music video which was released on You Tube only, we have decided we will not air the segment on the television broadcast of Sesame Street, which is aimed at preschoolers. Katy Perry fans will still be able to view the video on KatyPerry.com.Now, even little as I know about Ms. Perry, I'm aware she can be provocative. But on Sesame Street? Really? I wouldn't think Sesame Workshop would produce a segment that's inappropriate to air, no matter the celebrity involved. I mean, they have been doing this a long time--they rather seem to know what they're doing. Obviously, some parents disagree. So let's check out the video:
Now, I'm pretty strict about what my kids are allowed to watch. Heck, just yesterday my reasoning was called silly and ridiculous--that I was "over thinking"--in part because of my ban on (most) Disney movies. I'm, apparently, over protective. Or something. But this video "inappropriate"? Certainly not for any of the reasons of Outrage!™ I saw on the Facebook comment page, namely that Katy Perry wasn't wearing enough dress. This apparently was so shocking that the show received enough hate mail that they pulled the segment from airing. Know what Outraged Parents? Many women have boobs. They're simply part of the body--and like swinging arms or flying hair, they might move when someone runs around. Little kids? They don't really care or even notice. Ms. Perry wasn't doing anything "adult" in the video. She was running around and playing with Elmo. OFFS.
Now, I conceed that I think might be inappropriate simply because it's a terrible song and the whole thing is all very meh. Sorry, Sesame Workshop, but you've done much better. Katy Perry's cleavage, however, had nothing to do with it.
WHUT.
[Trigger warning for sexual violence and Polanski stuff.]
Well. This is depressing: Kate Winslet, Jodie Foster, Matt Dillon, and Christoph Waltz to Star in Roman Polanski's Next Film, God of Carnage.
Two women I would have paid to see read the back of a cereal box onscreen.
I feel sick.
I am particularly devastated that Jodie Foster, who played a real-life rape survivor in The Accused, alongside real-life rape survivor Kelly McGillis, would work with Polanski. The Accused (and McGillis' forthrightness about her own experience, too) meant a whole lot to me at one time in my life. Just...blub.
Between Polanski and Mel Gibson, that's quite a collection of pals Foster's got.
Kate Winslet, please call your friend Emma Thompson immediately.
A Good Example, for a Change
[Trigger warning for images and descriptions of domestic violence.]
We have, unfortunately, all too many opportunities to discuss serious message fail in anti-violence advocacy, anti-exploitation messaging, PSAs, adverts masquerading as PSAs, awareness-raising campaigns, women's health marketing, women's health fundraising, and other pieces of activism.
So it's a breath of relief to have an opportunity to post something that works. (Or, at least works in my opinion. YMMV.)
Below the fold is an advert/PSA for the National Domestic Violence Hotline, created by Y&R Chicago. It is difficult to watch, but it also extremely powerful and effective. And it is one of the very few spots I've seen where there is not a trace of victim-blaming, nor has any room been left for the imagery to be construed as "sexy." And just when one might think it's yet another anti-violence campaign that fails to acknowledge the abuser, the final moments are a pointed and breathtaking reminder that domestic violence does not just happen.
Credit to the agency who designed it; credit to the actress who conveys exactly the right things with her expressive face.
Please note that this may be triggering, which is one problem with this advert*, especially because it evokes so very successfully what being in a cycle of abuse feels like—the routine, the terror. It's tough to publicly reach out to people in abusive relationships without potentially triggering people who have survived them, but I have endless good will for those trying to navigate that difficult balance when the ad isn't gratuitously provocative.
A young, thin, blond, white woman, filmed first in close-up until the camera slowly pulls back to frame her from the shoulders up, stands looking into the camera as if into a mirror. A cover of "Mercy Street," sung by a female artist, plays. The woman has been crying, and mascara is running down her face. There is a cut on her right cheek. She dabs at the cut on her cheek and the running mascara, which disappears—just as a cut above her right eyebrow and a bruise on her left temple appear. She presses against the bruise, which disappears—just as a wound on her neck appears. She gingerly touches the wound on her neck, then drops her hand as her left eye blackens and a cut appears on the bridge of her nose, which cracks and bruises. As she breathes deeply, trying not to cry, a bruise appears on her right temple. Her nose begins to bleed. She wipes at the blood, but none of the injuries are going away anymore. She pulls her hand away to reveal a fat lip. Next to her, text appears: "It rarely stops." Suddenly, she jumps, frightened, and looks frantically to one side as if someone's coming into the room. The screen goes black.
Get help from the National Domestic Violence Hotline here.
The following text then appears onscreen: "The National Domestic Violence Hotline. 1.800.799.SAFE. (7233) / 1.800.787.3224 (TTY)."
Donate to the National Domestic Violence Hotline here.
[H/T to Copyranter.]
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* Another problem being that a young, thin, traditionally pretty, white woman is the "face of domestic violence" once again. Which is not to say, of course, that women meeting that precise description are not at risk for domestic violence; it's just that, if you look at anti-DV campaigns, you'd think they're the only ones who are. I'll note, however, that not actually showing the face of her abuser leaves open the possibility that her partner is a woman, which makes this ad inclusive of the extremely under-acknowledged issue of same-sex partner violence.
