[Trigger warning for clergy abuse and rape apologia.]
"These revelations were for me a shock and a great sadness. It is difficult to understand how this perversion of the priestly ministry was possible. … It is also a great sadness that the authorities of the church were not sufficiently vigilant and insufficiently quick and decisive in taking the necessary measures."—Pope Benedict XVI, expressing his alleged shock and sadness about the recent spate of reported clergy abuse—which might be more meaningful if it weren't for this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and about ten billion other posts to which I could link undermining the Pope's claims to shock and sadness.
Joelle Casteix of SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, responded to the Pope's quote thus: "It's disingenuous to say church officials have been slow and insufficiently vigilant in dealing with clergy sex crimes and cover ups. On the contrary, they've been prompt and vigilant, but in concealing, not preventing, these horrors." Ouch.
It's bad enough when the Pope just runs his usual defend and deflect routine, but this feigning innocence shtick is intolerable.
Quote of the Day
In Which CNN Doesn't Get "It"
Liss directed me to an article on CNN entitled “Is Ethnic Beauty the New “It” Factor?” From the article
There was a time when the Caucasian girl-next-door looks of Christie Brinkley, Cindy Crawford and more recently Kate Moss dominated the fashion pages. Then came new fashion icons: Naomi Campbell, Jennifer Lopez, Beyonce - and then Giselle, Kim Kardashian and Shakira.My immediate response was, “Eww.” Because I'm so generous, I’ll give you some reasons why in simple, numbered form.
More voluptuous figures, fuller lips and darker skin, features traditionally associated with women of African, Latin and Asian cultures, are "in." Over the past decade, an appreciation for ethnic beauty has been on the rise, and these natural features are becoming popular among Caucasian women who desire to look more "exotic."
1) CNN, you’re a little bit late. The New York Times ran a piece way back in 2003 about “Generation E.A.: Ethnically Ambiguous” in which advertising and fashion industry insiders waxed on about the “desire for the exotic, left-of-center beauty.” And you know what T. Denean Sharpley-Whiting discovered when she analyzed the “rise” of Generation E.A. in her book, Pimps Up, Ho’s Down? This:
“Despite the hubbub about Generation E.A., editors and ad executives admit that whiteness continues to dominate the beauty and fashion industries,” (31).2) There is something creepy and fetish-y and colonizer-y about talking about WoC’s “exotic” beauty, white women’s desire for it, and the commodification of it. “What’s not to love, embrace and emulate about ethnic beauty?” gushes one fashion director. And, yes, the NYT article actually used the word “exotic,” too. They also both, not-so-covertly, define WoC outside the realm of “Americanness.” From the CNN article:
The desire for individuality leads people to embrace the image of ethnic women over typical "cookie-cutter American beauties," said [Marie Claire beauty and health director, Ying] Chu.And one blogger claimed that “no one wants to just look like the quintessential American girl.”
With regards to the NYT article, Sharpley-Whiting notes that the “left-of-center” designation “still situates whiteness at the center of American beauty culture and darker hues on this schematic shifting to the left,” (31).
3) There is, apparently, “beauty” and “ethnic beauty.” Love that continued disappearing of (the normalizing of) whiteness.
4) This isn’t just about our increasingly multicultural nation. “ ‘Race’ mixing is not a ‘new reality,’” writes Sharpley-Whiting, “America [has never been] as ‘white’ as it believes itself to be,” (30). This is about the beauty myth and those ever-shifting goalposts. Naomi Wolf is right—women are never going to meet the elusive standards. I did agree with the blogger I mentioned in point two that this has less to do with a melting pot and more to do with the “obsession of perfection.” “The beauty standards,” she said, “[are] a bit skewed and contradicting.”
5) To imply that the fashion industry, with its notorious color and race issues is at the forefront of this “trend” is laughable, at best.
6) Speaking of the word trend, now, come on! I mean, the “it” factor? And the claim that the mainstream popularity and visibility of Beyoncé and Jennifer Lopez “made the larger, rounder bottom sexy?" This underlying notion, for which I don’t yet have the words, that implies that so-called ethnic beauty needed the affirmation, acceptance, and envy of white people to exist, is infuriating.
Texting! With Liss and Deeky!
[Spoiler warning for last night's Top Chef finale.]
Liss: [sends picture of Dudley lying on the couch on his back, legs akimbo]
Deeky: LOL! THAT DOG IS SUCH A KNUCKLEHEAD!
Liss: LOLOLOLOLOLOL! He's so the perfect dog for me, lol.
Deeky: No doy. P.S. Taking the trash out, in the rain, in your boxers, is not fun.
Liss: Why did you do that?!
Deeky: Because I didn't feel like putting on pants.
Liss: LOL 4 realz big time. We totes have to watch the Top Chef finale together live.
Deeky: Definitely! I just finished watching last week's now. So it's going to be a three-way sword fight, huh?
Liss: Dude Casserole.
Deeky: I am so not excited for this finale.
[The three sous chefs brought in are also men.]
Liss: Wow, surprise! THREE MORE DUDES!
Deeky: Now it's six dudes. They should all make sausage.
Liss: "Your first course is sausage. Your second course is wieners. Your third course is meatballs. Your final course must be a dessert—spotted dick!"
Deeky: LOL! TOTES. Sausage fest.
Liss: "Let's get ready to cock! I mean COOK. I definitely meant COOK."
Deeky: LOLOLOL! Oh, dear. Angelo is very sick. Poor Angelo.
Liss: GET IT TOGETHER, ANGELO! YOU HAVE A DICK-MEASURING CONTEST TO ATTEND! ARE WE SUPPOSED TO HAVE THIS DICK-MEASURING CONTEST WITH ONLY FIVE DICKS?!
Deeky: LOLOLOLOLOLOL! Vivomart? No Whole Foods in Singapore?
Liss: I know. It might as well be named VULVAMART.
[Angelo gets a shot in the buttocks from a doctor.]
Deeky: Angelo is getting it in the butt!
Liss: This episode should just be called "That's What He Said. Plus WIENERS!"
Deeky: Quick question: Is vacuuming the closet the gayest thing I'll do today?
Liss: No, watching Angelo get shot in the rear is the gayest thing you'll do today.
Deeky: LOL!
Liss: Would you want to eat something prepared by someone with Montezuma's Revenge? Or whatever it's called there. The Singapore Squirts.
Deeky: LOLz for real @ Singapore Squirts. No. Fuck no. Unless he used anti-bacterial Hamburger Helper.
Liss: Eww.
Deeky: :"Ed and I were pushing like animals."
Liss: THAT'S WHAT HE SAID!
Deeky: "It takes a lot of balls to make a veggie turine."
Liss: THAT'S WHAT HE SAID!
Deeky: Is this shit over yet?
Liss: This is soooooooooooooo boring.
Deeky: I know. Who gives a shit about these jokers?
Liss: Fucking NO ONE, that's who. BRING BACK TIFFANY!
Deeky: For serious. Worst. Season. Ever.
Liss: "I'll take yours. Bring it on."
Deeky: THAT'S WHAT HE SAID.
Liss: I so don't even care who wins.
Deeky: Me either. Wevs.
Liss: "Kevin really punched me with fruit, but I loved Angelo's diarrhea cakes!"
Deeky: Essence of colon.
Liss: "His botulism stew was DIVINE!"
Deeky: LOL!
Liss: "Personally, I'm not sure we should give the title of Top Chef to someone who gave us all ebola. Plus, his barf gelato was underseasoned."
Deeky: This show should pack its knives and go.
Liss: LOL! Oh, look—Kevin, whom no one, including the editors, even noticed until three episodes ago, just won. Yay? Congratulations, Kevin. We knew nothing about you!
Deeky: OMFG. Top Chef: Pink Donuts is on. Wevs.
Liss: OMG LOLOLOL pink donuts! I can't. Stop. Laughing.
Deeky: Where the fuck is this? L.A.?
Liss: Candyland.
Deeky: Okay, who is this rockabilly goofball?
Liss: He's Johnny Elvisface, King of Candyland.
Deeky: That clown better not bring his sideburns to Faggottown.
Liss: Ha!
Deeky: Ummm, how the fuck do you have a Quickfire BAKING contest?
Liss: LOL!
Deeky: Uh oh, someone's meringues have browned.
Liss: Nice snot cupcake, Ice Queen!
Deeky: LOL! It looked like bile.
Liss: Whoops, that's not ganache he's oozing!
Deeky: Sex or chocolate? Which would you choose?
Liss: I would choose sex with MISTER CHOCOLATE!
Deeky: This show may be worse than Top Chef: Spy Hard.
Liss: Whoops, someone stole your head and replaced it with the head of an Elvis impersonator from a Vegas wedding chapel!
Deeky: "Editor at Large from the Daily Candy"? That's a thing? And Earl Grey mousse? Barf!
Liss: Top Chef: Garbage Desserts.
Deeky: LOL!
Liss: This show blowz, but at least it's not as boring as the last season of Top Chef.
Deeky: I guess. And shouldn't they have changed that knife in the logo to a spoon or something?
Liss: They should have changed it to a pink donut.
Deeky: Well, at least this show will only last one season.
Liss: LOL!
Deeky: Danielle has serious sad face. "Your dessert just didn't measure up." Wevs.
Liss: Please pack your cupcakes and get the fuck out of here.
Deeky: LOL!
Liss: I'm going to bed, Mr. Chocolate B-Hole. Goodnight!
Deeky: Nighty-night, Lady Donut!
Liss: HA!
This is a real thing in the world.
[Trigger warning for fucked-up body image stuff and patriarchy compliance on an extreme scale.]
WHUT:
In one of the most shocking reality TV ideas yet, E! has ordered a new series that crosses a wedding competition with extreme plastic surgery.Case of the sads. :(
The network is set to announce "Bridalplasty," where brides-to-be compete in wedding-themed challenges to win extensive surgical procedures.
Each week, a group of women competes head-to-head in such challenges as writing wedding vows and planning honeymoons. The winner receives the chance to choose a plastic surgery procedure from her "wish list." She's given the procedure immediately, and results are shown at the start of the following week's episode.
One by one, the women are voted out by their competitors and, according to the show's description, "possibly walking away with nothing and losing [their] chance to be the perfect bride."
The last bride standing will receive a "dream wedding," where she will reveal her new appearance to friends, family and the groom. "Viewers will witness his emotional and possibly shocked reaction as they stand at the altar and he lifts her veil to see her for the first time following her extreme plastic surgery," E! said.
Celebrity surgeon Terry Dubrow (Fox's infamous "The Swan") will lend his expertise to the procedures, and celebrity bride Shanna Moakler (ex-wife of Blink-182's Travis Barker) will host.
Giuliana Rancic executive produces the show, as do Mark Cronin and Cris Abrego of 51 Minds, the company behind VH1's "The Surreal Life" and "Rock of Love" franchises.
I don't believe in the "sanctity of marriage," but, if I did, I'm certain I would hold the position that this undermines it more than same-sex marriage does.
Top Chef Open Thread
[Image from last night's season finale: Chefjudicator Eric Ripert buys some cuttlefish or something.]
Last night's episode will be lamented as the most unengaging finale in the history of finales, so if you haven't seen it, and don't want any spoilers, pack your tools and go...
Obama Appoints Warren to Advisory Role
So, there's this lady named Elizabeth Warren who's awesome. If you watch The Daily Show, or you've seen any recent documentaries about the disaster that is the US economy—e.g. Michael Moore's Capitalism: A Love Story, or James Scurlock's Maxed Out: Hard Times, Easy Credit and the Era of Predatory Lenders—you know who she is, even if you don't know who she is. She's the one who made you think, "I wish she were in charge."
Awhile ago, Warren proposed the establishment of a Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, which everyone thought was a great idea! Everyone except all the people who like to rip off unprotected consumers, who have lots of lobbyists who they've hired with all the money they made ripping off unprotected consumers.
Nonetheless, President Obama was in favor of the Bureau. Thing is, he wasn't sure the very smart lady who actually conceived of it was the right person to lead it. It seems like all those highly-paid lobbyists funded by unprotected consumers were whispering in his ear that they didn't really want someone competent running a bureau that might cramp their ripping-off-unprotected-consumers style.
But labor unions, consumer advocacy groups, and progressives of various stripes lobbied on Warren's behalf, since she's sort of the perfect gal for the job and all.
So it was almost exciting when it was reported yesterday that Warren would be appointed to lead the commission. Sort of.
Elizabeth Warren, who conceived of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, will oversee its establishment as an assistant to President Obama.
We're meant to understand that this is GOOD NEWS, because it avoids what could be a gnarly confirmation battle.
...Ms. Warren will be named an assistant to the president, a designation that is held by senior White House staff members, including Rahm Emanuel, the chief of staff. She will also be a special adviser to the Treasury secretary, Timothy F. Geithner, and report jointly to Mr. Obama and Mr. Geithner. The financial regulation law delegated to the Treasury Department the powers of the bureau until a permanent director was appointed and confirmed by the Senate to a five-year term.
The decision does not preclude the possibility that Ms. Warren could eventually be named director, and at the least, she would play a pivotal role in deciding whom to appoint to the job, according to the official.
Some called on Mr. Obama to formally nominate Ms. Warren to lead the bureau even if it led to a confirmation battle, arguing that Democrats should embrace such a battle as a means of drawing attention to the bureau's significance.
We want to get her in an easily-marginalized role as quickly as possible!
However, the White House saw drawbacks to that approach, according to the official. If Ms. Warren's nomination were in limbo for months, she would be generally precluded from serving fully as the public face of the bureau, or even testifying before Congress.
"The stakes are too high to delay the standing up of this agency," the official said.
Oh, I know. I'm the most cynical cunt in all of Cuntistan, but it's just that Warren, who has spent her career advocating on behalf of middle- and working-class families, is hated by the people with the deep pockets who fund US politics these days: "She has drawn fire from financial institutions for her persistent attacks on abusive, deceptive and unfair lending practices; some banking executives believe she has been overly broad in criticizing those practices."
They're too big to fail piss off.
But Obama's voter base expects him to be the eminently reasonable bloke he purports himself to be, and appoint someone who is clearly their ally—and not just another Wall Street Wonderboy like the rest of Obama's Treasury Department appointees—to a position in which an alliance with the people the bureau is meant to protect seems an integral qualification for the job.
Well, that certainly leaves Obama in a pickle!
So here comes the 12-dimensional chess play, and Warren is being pseudo-appointed. And we're assumed, once again, to be too stupid to appreciate the distinction, and too pleased with the crumbs we're being thrown to question why the president isn't willing to fight for what the people who elected him believe in.
A typical miss, Obama.
Also see: Echidne and Susie.
Happy Birthday, Mustang Bobby!
Happy Birthday to youuuuuuuuu!
Happy Birthday to youuuuuuuuu!
You're as gay as a pink pair of shoe-oooooos!
And I love you as much as pink shoes, too!
Happy Birthday, doll!
*mwah*
Stop Me If You Think You've Heard This One Before
Good news, shoegazers! The Smiths' seminal "Stop Me If You Think You've Heard This One Before" has been confirmed as a playable track on the upcoming Rock Band 3.
And if you can't wait until October 26 to get your mope on, both Morrissey and the Smiths make their RB debut this week with "Irish Blood, English Heart" and "This Charming Man", respectively.
The full RB3 setlist can be viewed here.
[Cross-posted.]
Question of the Day
What have you made multiple attempts to learn, but just haven't been able to master?
Guitar. My chubbly wee short fingers just do not want to cooperate.
I shred on RockBand, though!
Of Course They Do
The Corn Refiners Association wants high-fructose corn syrup to be known instead as "corn sugar."
Yeah, now that people are catching on to the coincidence that the OH NOES OBESITY CRISIS!!! started around the same time that HFCS was introduced into virtually every food or beverage product USians consume, and researchers have found that HFCS prompts considerably more weight gain than table sugar, and people are starting to look for HFCS-free foods, I bet the Corn Refiners Association sure does want a new name on the label.
Unfortunately, it's still the same shitty product.
[H/T to Shaker BlueRidge.]
Quote of the Day
"I feel like there are a few of us in blogland who spend most of our time trying to come up with new and vaguely interesting ways of say, 'The economy sucks, there are things that could be done about that, why isn't anybody doing those things?' So here's another chart."—Atrios.
That may be too inside blogball to be universally funny, but it made me LOL for realz.
(For those who don't know, Atrios is a pseudonym for very smart economist-type dude Duncan Black.)
Discussion Thread: Rachel Zoe Project
[Trigger warning for reproductive coercion.]
Now, I know that Iain and I cannot be the only people in Shakesville who have a morbid fascination with the Rachel Zoe Project, so, fellow Zoezies, can we discuss last night's episode?
(For those who don't watch: Rachel is Rachel Zoe, celebrity stylist and CEO of her brand. Rodger is her husband, who recently become president of her company after "they" decided she needed someone to take care of the business aspects of the business, while she focused on the creative work.)
The totally not scripted (!) narrative arc to this season has been: Rodger wants a baby. Well, that's the ostensible narrative. The real narrative is something more like: Rodger, who doesn't really have a life of his own separate from Rachel, is increasingly agitated by how much time Rachel spends immersed in her work, how little alone time they have, and how he has to play second fiddle to his wife—and seems to think that coercing her into having a child she isn't sure she wants will force her to pay more attention to her personal life (i.e. him).
Rodger constantly badgers Rachel about her biological clock running out, as do her sister and father, while her hairdresser/friend tells her he comes into work every day just hoping she'll tell him she's pregnant. (Huh?) From all directions, Rachel is being pressured into trying to have a baby, even though she has expressed no desire to have a baby herself and has instead expressed strong reservations about her psychological capacity to handle the physical and emotional strain of a pregnancy.
In last night's episode, her hairdresser/friend asked her incredulously if she expected to be happy with nothing but her job in 15 years (perish the thought!), and Rodger flatly stated he wasn't sure he'd stay with Rachel if she wouldn't try to get pregnant. It wasn't that he was ruefully lamenting, "I don't know if our relationship can make it, because I really want kids someday and I'm not sure Rachel does," but that he was essentially demanding she get on board the baby train NOW or face the consequences.
He is trying to use a pregnancy as a means of control over his wife, who he feels isn't dedicating enough time and attention to him. Which is textbook reproductive coercion.
It is difficult to watch. I don't know where this season is headed, and I'm really fearful about where it's going to go.
Daily Dose o' Cute
Dudley wakes up from a nap and sleepily grooms himself. Is he biting his foot or yawning? Eh, both. After nearly 30 full seconds of activity, he collapses with a heaving snort back into the sleep-readiness position.
As always, pix of the entire menagerie below the fold...
Sir Sleepsalot
Lady Catterly
Dame Olivia of Welcomeshire
Queen Matilda
Today's Edition of "Conniving and Sinister"
See Deeky's archive of all previous Conniving & Sinister strips here.
[In which Liss reimagines the long-running comic "Frank & Ernest," about two old straight white guys "telling it like it is," as a fat feminist white woman (Liss) and a biracial queerbait (Deeky) telling it like it actually is from their perspectives. Hilarity ensues.]
Wednesday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by Shaxco, makers of Dudley's Designer Dog Couches.
Recommended Reading:
Lori: Michelle Bachelet to Head New UN Agency for Women
Andy: Australia Lifts Ban on Transgender Military Service
[Trigger warning for racism] Tassja: White Feminists and Me: A Fable of Solidarity
[Trigger warning for fat hatred] Silentbeep: Talking Past Each Other
[Trigger warning for misogyny] Melissa: TV's Top Showrunners
[Trigger warning for sexual violence] Cara: U.S. Border Patrol Agents Charged with Rape, Assault, and Torture
Leave your links in comments...
AHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHA!!!
That's the sound of my screaming punctuated with nervous laughter as I watched the below video of a tower technician working on a transmission tower 1,768 feet in the air after partially free-climbing it sans safety line, which I strongly recommend you do not watch if you have a fear of heights or propensity for vertigo. But if you, like me, weirdly enjoy the feeling of your stomach being eaten by fluttering bats that's generally only evoked by roller-coasters and bungee-jumping, then WATCH AWAY!
In either case, let us all give a round of horrified applause to the technicians who keep our visual teletypes and e-newseys transmissioning smoothly.
The video begins with a voiceover explaining: "Getting to work can be a chore—especially if your workplace is 1,700 feet straight up. That's the commute for people that work on transmission lines and antennae in the world of broadcasting. This video shows what it's like to climb to the top of a 1,768-foot tower just to begin your workday." From there, footage from the climber's view, via a camera atop his headgear, as he completes his ascent.
[Via Gabe.]
For the Straight, White, Wealthy, Famous, Super-Privileged Dude Who Has Everything
[Click to embiggen.]
From the October issue of men's magazine GQ:
Headline: Ryan Reynolds Wants Out of the BoxFrom the October issue of men's magazine Details:
Subhead: Funny. Charming. Ripped. (Even his abs have abs.) As likable as a guy that handsome can be. But while everyone was taking him for granted as a bright spot in mediocre comedies or puzzling over his stealth marriage to the world's most desirable woman, Ryan Reynolds was busy making himself a movie star, which is one way to explain his latest role, as a man who's been buried alive.
Headline: Brian Austin Green Married Megan Fox—and You Didn'tEmphasis mine.
Subhead: Since leaving the 90210 ZIP code, the actor has endured cracks about his hair, his rap album, and his flagging career. But he wakes up next to Megan Fox every morning, so who's laughing now?
A hot, successful wife still makes a great accessory!
To be clear, neither Ryan Reynolds nor Brian Austin Green speak about their wives that way. (Reynolds is married to Scarlett Johansson—whose name, I note, is inserted into the URL for the story for purposes of commoditizing her to draw traffic, but not inserted into the subhead for purposes of commoditizing her as her husband's covetable accessory.) Treating Fox and Johansson like trophies acquired by their husbands is a trick of the magazines, whose uninspired and indistinguishable layouts and virtually identical content—apparently men are longing to read about famous men's hot wives and rock hard abs—would expose their pathetic hackery, even if their revolting misogyny didn't.
