The Emmy Awards were last night, and, while I was the embodiment of wev about almost the entirety of the show, including most of the winners, I loved the opening of the show, in which host Jimmy Fallon was joined in one of his patented Glee homages by, among other notables, Lost's Jorge Garcia (Hurley):
Two pages.
That's how long the opening chapter is. Two pages. But hey, that's enough to meet our protagonist, Noah Gardner: "Good-looking, great job, fine education, puckishly amusing and even clever when he put his mind to it, reasonably fit and trim for an office jockey, Noah had all the bona fide credentials for a killer eHarmony profile" who had "spent a full decade building what most guys would call an outstanding record of success with the ladies."
Okay, so, I'm not most guys, but let me ask you something. Is "an outstanding record of success with the ladies" a common phrase among your peer group, most guys? Just wondering. It's nice though, to see Beck give a nod to Christian dating site eHarmony, I guess to keep relevant.
As he'd rounded the corner of age twenty-seven and stared the dreaded number thirty right in the face, Noah had begun to realize something... While he'd been aiming low with his standards in the game of love, the women he'd been meeting might all have been doing exactly the same thing. Now, on his twenty-eighth birthday, he still wasn't sure what he wanted in a woman but he knew what he didn't want: arm candy. He was sick of it. Maybe, just maybe, it was time to consider thinking about getting serious.
Conservative US radio and television commentator Glenn Beck speaks at a rally dubbed 'Restoring Honor,' to show support of the US military, organized by Beck, one of the de facto leaders of the Tea Party movement at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, DC, on August 28, 2010. The rally has attracted controversy because it is being held on the 47th anniversary of civil rights legend Martin Luther King Jr.'s 'I Have a Dream' speech, at the Lincoln Memorial on the National Mall, where King spoke. [Getty Images.]So, Glenn Beck had his "Restoring Honor" rally this weekend, and, despite Fox News' estimate that half a million people were in attendance, it was more like 90,000. Which is still terrifying enough.
People gather at the Lincoln Memorial on the National Mall on August 28, 2010, in Washington, DC. Thousands of Americans gathered Saturday in the heart of the US capital for a rally to 'Restore America,' led by conservative icons including talk show host Glenn Beck and former Alaska governor Sarah Palin. [Getty Images.]Yes, Sarah Palin was there, too, right in the center of a rally stewing xenophobic nationalism, patriotic jingoism, militarism, religion, and unfettered anger in a big, fascist pot.
Former Alaska governor Sarah Palin speaks during a rally dubbed 'Restoring Honor,' to show support of the US military, organized by conservative radio and television commentator Glenn Beck. [Getty Images.]There was a lot of this going on:
Two rally-goers stand side-by-side, a white man with a red t-shirt reading "One Nation Under God," and a white woman with a blue t-shirt reading "It is impossible to rightly govern a nation without God and the Bible." [Getty Images.]And some of this:
Men wear colonial costumes as thousands gather to support TV commentator Glenn Beck at his Restoring Honor rally on the US National Mall in Washington, August 28, 2010. [Reuters Pictures.]
Tami Ernst, and her brother John Ernst, both from Houston, are dressed for the occasion at the Glenn Beck 'Restoring Honor' rally in front of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, Saturday, Aug. 28, 2010. [AP.]As Sinclair Lewis famously said, when fascism comes to America, it will be dressed like a total jackass.
All part of Glenn Beck's crusade to reclaim the Civil Rights Movement, no doubt. [Reuters Pictures.]The inclusion of Frederick Douglass is great, just great. I love how it conveys that modern white conservatives are enslaved, seeking their freedom, and Beck is their Douglass. Sure.
Beck stands behind the banner of Lincoln, which reads "RESTORING HONOR." [AP.]I will take it as further evidence that God does not exist that Lincoln was not momentarily reanimated just so he could kick Glenn Beck's ass.
Actual Headline: Democrats can't agree over killing or saving the Bush-era tax cuts.
Of course they can't.
"It's hard to say the Republican economic policies were bad, [and] then continue them," Paul Begala, Democratic strategist and former advisor to President Clinton, told The Hill. "That is a bit of a mixed message."lolsob.
CNN: Court allows agents to secretly put GPS trackers on cars
Juan Pineda-Moreno was recently convicted of conspiracy to grow marijuana.
But he appealed on the grounds that sneaking onto a person's driveway and secretly tracking their car violates a person's reasonable expectation of privacy.
The U.S. Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals rejected the appeal twice -- in January of this year by a three-judge panel, and then again by the full court earlier this month.
"You left place A, at this time, you went to place B, you took this street -- that information can be gleaned in a variety of ways," said David Rivkin, a former Justice Department attorney. "It can be old surveillance, by tailing you unbeknownst to you; it could be a GPS."
He says that a person cannot automatically expect privacy just because something is on private property.
"You have to take measures -- to build a fence, to put the car in the garage" or post a no-trespassing sign, he said. "If you don't do that, you're not going to get the privacy."
The American Family Values Children Christian Liberty Freedom Patriot Association Foundation Organization Family Research Council is running a new ad voicing their opposition to the repeal of DADT. There are a lot of things to love about it, but I think my favorite part is the implication that there have never been, and are currently not, any gay servicemembers. Which, were that true, would render DADT unnecessary, anyway—now, wouldn't it?
Of course, logic is not one of the qualities for which members of the Family Research Council are generally known.
Male voiceover: [over footage of soldiers in WWI, WWII, Vietnam, and one of the Gulf Wars] They fought in trenches, stormed beaches, cut through sweltering jungles, marched over burning deserts. [over footage of soldiers marching, and hovering helicopters] Our military has protected our soil, seas, and skies. But today they're drawn into a new battle. [over an image of a Pride parade and a big rainbow flag, accompanied by the text "HARRY REID and HOMOSEXUAL ACTIVISTS pushing their agenda on our military] Harry Reid and homosexual activists are attempting to advance their political agenda [over image of rainbow flag flying near capital] by overturning "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." [over image of tank in the Gulf] Our military is for protection, not politics. [over FRC logo with "paid for by" text] Stop Harry Reid! Family Research Council Action PAC is responsible for the content of this advertising.I also dearly love the idea that advocating for the inclusion of openly gay soldiers is politics, but advocating for their continued exclusion is not.
The Overton Window opens with Eli Churchill at a pay phone in the middle of the desert, roll of quarters in his hand, calling Beverly, and spilling the beans on a conspiracy involving a missing two-point-three trillion dollars and eleven nuclear weapons. In two and a half pages, Beck has laid out the entire plot. To hell with suspense, or mystery. No one wants that in a thriller, right? And to say this is poorly written is an understatement. The writing is clunky, stiff, amateurish. It reads like fan fiction, with apologies to writers of fan fiction.
Let's just jump right in, shall we?
He cradled the pay-phone receiver against his shoulder, glanced down the narrow, rutted Mojave dirt road he'd traveled to get here, and then up the long, dark way in the other direction.
In this much quiet your ears could play tricks on you. He could have sworn that there'd been a sound out of place, like the snap of a stalk of dried grass underfoot, even though no other human being had any business being within twenty miles of where he stood, but he couldn't be sure.
He worked his last six quarters from their torn paper roll and dropped them one by one into the coin slot.
He had just three minutes left. In a way, it was ironic. After years of planning, he'd brought all the evidence he needed to back up his story, but not nearly enough change to buy the time to tell it.
"Now where was I ..." As he riffled through his pile of photocopies a couple of the loose papers got caught up in a gust and went floating off into the night.
"You were talking about the money."
"Yes, good, okay. Two-point-three trillion dollars is what we're talking about. Do you know how much that is? From sea level that's a stack of thousand-dollar bills that would reach to outer space and back with thirty miles to spare.
"I've seen the place, one of the places where they're getting ready for something—something big—planning it out, you know? I got a job inside in maintenance, as a cleanup man. They thought I was just a janitor, but I had the run of the place overnights.
"I saw what they're planning to do. They're building a structure." He checked his notes to make sure he was getting it right. "Not like a building, but like a political and economic and social structure. They've been working on it for a long, long time. Decades. When they collapse the current system, this new one they've put together will be all that's left."
"They're changing the books so that in a generation from now almost nobody will remember what this country used to be. They've got the economy set up to fall like a house of cards whenever they're ready to tap the first one at the foundation. They've got the controlled media all lined up and ready to carry out their PR campaign. And they've got people so indebted and mind-controlled and unprepared, they'll turn to anybody who says he's got the answer."
A glint of brilliant red light on the wall of the booth caught his attention. He turned, as the man behind him had known that he would, and let the phone drop from his hand.
Eli Churchill had enough time left to begin a quiet prayer but not enough to end it. His final appeal was interrupted by a silenced gunshot, and a .357 semi-jacketed hollow point was the last thing to go through his mind.
This blogaround brought to you by Shaxco, proud distributors of Kate's OMG SHOEZ, now in fuchsia!
Recommended Reading:
Tami: What's So Funny About Antoine Dodson? [TW for discussion of attempted rape.]
Helen G: New Research Into Domestic Abuse Against Trans People [TW for violence]
Liz: The Government's Dereliction of Duty in the Ninth Ward
Echidne: What Are President Obama's Goals?
Living ~400lbs: "I'm squishy, but I'm NOT obese."
Audacia: What Does Feminism Mean to You? Three African Youth Activists Speak Out [video]
Leave your links in comments...
So, ladies, you say you want a raise? How should you go about getting it?
First, you have to figure out how to compete with the guy in the next cubicle. After all, he went to a school almost as good as yours. His grades were nearly as good as yours, too. He works hard. In fact, most mornings, he's the second person in the office. You know this, because you're always first. He is young, ruggedly good looking, and he washes his balls with a manly but fresh sandalwood soap.
What to do?
Fortunately, the good folks at Women's Day and Summer's Eve have a few words of advice for you.
[I]f you think this is one of the most outrageous and insulting advertisements you've ever seen, feel free to tell the people at Woman's Day. You can also call them at (212) 767-6000.
And don't forget the Summer's Eve people. Their toll-free number is 866-787-6383, and the website is HERE.
Teaspoons ahoy.Ever want to be class president? Ok, I never did. However, if this was your desire and you attend Nettleton Middle School in Nettleton, MS, and you're white--congratulations and good luck on your goal. If you're black? Well, too bad for you.
Nettleton Middle School in Nettleton, Miss., has segregated its elected class positions by race, according to a memo sent home with children at the school last week that was obtained by NBC News.You can read the memo (.pdf).
The memo was first brought to light when Brandy Springer, a mother of four children, contacted blogger Suzy Richardson, founder and editor of the blog mixedandhappy.com. It was also reported by Gawker.
“My [eighth-grade] daughter came home from [Nettleton] school telling me that she wanted to try out for the school reporter, but it is only open to black students,” Springer wrote Richardson. “They told her ‘she should run for class president, that was open to only white students.'”
The memo indicates that only white students can be president of the school’s eighth grade, while only black students can be vice president.
In seventh grade, whites are the only ones who can be both president and vice president, while the only position a black student at Nettleton can apply for in sixth grade is that of the class reporter.
Separately, Springer told msnbc.com she spoke with the superintendent of the Nettleton school district on Thursday. She said he agreed the policy was outdated and that he was willing to review the policy."Outdated"?! It's "under review"? WTF is there to review? That implies it may be kept and that somehow the school thinks the policy is not racist horseshit (helpful hint: it is, in fact, racist horseshit). While you're at it, Mr. Taylor, you should look at your homecoming policies, too (.pdf).
The school issued a media statement on its website, but would not comment on any specific details about the memo or excerpts from the handbook.
“The processes and procedures for student elections are under review,” Superintendent Russell Taylor said in the statement. “We are reviewing the origin of these processes, historical applications, compliance issues, as well as current implications and ramifications.”
So, I'm reading this article about a minister, Kenda Creasy Dean, who's worried that "more teens becoming 'fake' Christians." Now, you know how I feel about those sorts of designations no matter who makes them, but I find it particularly amusing when it's a female minister wringing her hands about younger generations falling away from any particular brand of Christianity, because, well, you know.
But I digress.
The thing that really caught my attention was Dean's prescription to parents to discourage their teens from embracing a "mutant" and "imposter" faith and make them passionate about a more "conventional Christianity."
What can a parent do then?I know I'm just an iniquitous heathen doomed to be consigned to eternal hellfire and all, but this advice strikes me as part of the reason so many young people are falling away from USian Christianity: It reeks of privilege and cynicism to suggest that the average Christian can, and should—after spending the first sixteen (or however many) years of your kid's life not living a life that suggests "how Christians live" is by making radical sacrifices—pick up and take off to work for a summer in Bolivia.
Get "radical," Dean says.
She says parents who perform one act of radical faith in front of their children convey more than a multitude of sermons and mission trips.
A parent's radical act of faith could involve something as simple as spending a summer in Bolivia working on an agricultural renewal project or turning down a more lucrative job offer to stay at a struggling church, Dean says.
But it's not enough to be radical -- parents must explain "this is how Christians live," she says.
"If you don't say you're doing it because of your faith, kids are going to say my parents are really nice people," Dean says. "It doesn't register that faith is supposed to make you live differently unless parents help their kids connect the dots."
