Sad Fatties

[Trigger warning for images of violence and for fat hatred. Video is mildly NSFW, with some brief female nudity.]

Shaker Julie forwarded me the below advertisement for the weight loss drug, Xenical, which appears to be a real advert, although I can't determine it's actually running anywhere at the moment. (Let us fervently hope it is not.) Previously, Xenical ran ads so objectionable in Canada that it prompted the Canadian Women's Health Network to write a letter of complaint to the Minister of Health. Xenical is known in the US as "Ally."

Voiceover (in accented English, over gauzy images, treated to look like vintage footage, of a thin white woman in various scenes, like as a nun, cradling a wounded soldier, or as a blindfolded soon-to-be-victim of a firing squad, sporting a drawn-on mustache, interspersed with random images like a bloodied knife or a pink rose): I'd like to do all the things most people just read about: Know real love and real fear, walk naked in the winter snow and in the summer tide, to play like a child, to think as a martyr, to make love to [a] stranger, taste sin and purity at the same moment in time, to be as a lamb in a den of wolves. (woman holds up silver hand mirror) But first (the image cuts to an extreme close-up of a white female face) I would just like to tie my own shoes. (ominously, the camera slowly pulls back, revealing a fat woman sitting on a bed, looking miserable, which fades to the onscreen text: "Lose weight. Gain life.")
This reminds me of the advert for the Realize Adjustable Gastric Band we discussed here, which also relied on the truly absurd premise that all fat people live terrible, unfulfilling, limited lives because they're SO FAT.

Some fat people do live terrible, unfulfilling, limited lives, and in some cases it may be because they're fat—or because they've got shame, anxiety, and/or rigidly self-imposed boundaries in response to endemic cultural fat hatred. I do not want to disappear those experiences. But those experiences are not, as the above advert (and the similar Realize advert) would have us believe, universal among fat people.

I have known real love and real fear (don't even get me started on romanticizing fear as an experience all humans should have); I have gone skinny-dipping in Lake Michigan (and I've no interest in walking naked in the winter snow, but my fat wouldn't stop me if I did); I have fucked a stranger; blah blah blah. I can also tie my own shoes.

I've also traveled to other continents, lived in another country, ridden roller coasters, gone horseback riding, hiked through the Highlands, been rollerskating and bowling and golfing and rockclimbing and biking, gotten married, gotten divorced, gotten married again, had personal and professional achievements, had personal and professional failures, made friends, lost touch with friends, learned how to cook and tapdance and play piano and milk a cow, played endless video games, wrote a book, rode an elephant, went to prom, went to university, went to Niagra Falls, went to a taping of the Drew Carey Show (don't ask), went to Disneyland, went to Disney World, went to Sesame Place, went up in the Statue of Liberty, went up in the Arch, threw up in a brewery in St. Louis, pet a giraffe, bought a house, sold a house, bought another house, struggled financially, splurged stupidly, acquired a disability unrelated to my fat, and a second, visited 44 of the 50 states, watched a calf being born, saw The Matrix: Reloaded in IMAX from the first goddamn row, attended hundreds of rock concerts, got drunk, got high, got sick, got knocked down, got back up again, and flown a kite. That's not a definitive list. Still. All these things I have done, often in the company of other fat people—and I am a fat person.



See? Double chin and everything.

It turns out, lots of fat people live full lives just fine. And we're probably more keenly conscious of the act of living life than lots of thin people, because we're constantly reminded that we're doing so in direct contravention of the expectation that we should be sitting at home on our beds looking sad.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: It remains a radical act to be fat and happy. If you're fat, you're not only meant to be unhappy, but deeply ashamed of yourself, projecting at all times an apologetic nature, indicative of your everlasting remorse for having wrought your monstrous self upon the world. You are certainly not meant to be bold, or assertive, or confident—and should you manage to overcome the constant drumbeat of messages that you are ugly and unsexy and have earned equally society's disdain and your own self-hatred, should you forget your place and walk into the world one day with your head held high, you are to be reminded by the cow-calls and contemptuous looks of perfect strangers that you are not supposed to have self-esteem; you don't deserve it. Being publicly fat and happy is hard; being publicly, shamelessly, unshakably fat and happy is an act of both will and bravery.

Fuck off, Xenical. I'm fat and happy.

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Discussion Thread: "I Love the Way You Lie" Video

[Trigger warning for imagery, lyrics, and discussion featuring domestic violence.]

Eminem, featuring Rihanna: "Love the Way You Lie"



[Lyrics available here.]

The above video is for the new single from Eminem's most recent album. The song features vocals by Rihanna, who was famously assaulted by then-boyfriend Chris Brown. And, of course, Eminem has regularly sung about domestic violence, often from the position of a perpetrator, wishing violence against his ex-wife and mother.

The video itself features Eminem and Rihanna singing in front of a house on fire, interwoven with scenes of Dominic Monaghan and Megan Fox, playing a couple who inhabit the fiery house with their fucked-up relationship that is a combustible mix of love, hate, fucking, fighting, dependence, contempt.

Okay, so. There's a lot to deconstruct about this video, and I'm not even sure where to begin to parse it all, which is why I'm opening it up as a discussion thread. My two primary thoughts after first watching the video, however, were these:

1. While this is a narrative (the quality and efficacy of which is debatable) broadly about "domestic violence," it looks less like a classic domestic violence narrative in which there is one clear abuser and one clear victim of abuse, and more like an abuser's fantasy that reimagines the relationship as a mutually abusive relationship with passion that burns so hot there's a thin line between love/hate, fight/fuck, etc. "Can't live with you; can't live without you." Which is not to say those relationships don't exist in the world, but I'm not sure they're as common as our media suggests they are.

2. I'm trying to imagine watching this as a, say, 15-year-old girl, long before I had the tools to critique it, and before I had any relevant experience to the subject matter. I imagine I would have found it less an admonishment against violence than a suggestion that this is what real love is like, because I was raised in a culture that constantly suggests that is so. And respect is boring.

Discuss.

[Commenting Guidelines: Naturally, everyone's reaction to this video will be different, and please be respectful of other people's opinions. Even survivors of abuse will have different reads on it. We can debate and disagree while simultaneously acknowledging the validity of individual opinions.]

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Local News

Local Paper: Schumer in Syracuse promotes $600 million bill to secure Mexican border

At first I was confused. Was Syracuse being overrun by Buffalo Bread Bites from Paulanjo's up on State Route 104? Oh, Mexico the country. Right. Pressing issue up here near the Canadian frontier.

Approved unanimously? WTF?!? That's kinda messed up.

If the House approved this unanimously and it's going to sail through the Senate, it hardly strikes me as a major accomplishment that Schumer can take credit for. I mean, what's with the dog-and-pony show about punishing Indian companies so that we can afford to punish people from Mexico (the country)?

Oh yeah. Election in November. Election in November. Election in November. That explains a lot.

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Random YouTubery: Justin Bieber and Spaghetti Cat


Video paraphrase and transcript: A terribly photoshopped image of Justin Bieber and Spaghetti Cat in a hot-air balloon appears terribly photoshopped into still images of various places around the world, including the White House, Mt. Everest, the Sphinx, Mt. Rushmore, the Taj Mahal, Big Ben, The View, Phil Spector's trial, an NBA game, Endor, Smurf Village, the Moon, and over the moonlight ocean whence is emerging seven white unicorns.

Over the images, in the style of a cartoon theme song, a cartoony voice sings: "Justin Bieber and Spaghetti Cat / Flying in a helium balloon / Solving mysteries around the world / Make way for adventure—they will be here soon! / Fightin' crime and havin' fun / Got the bad guys on the run / When one caper's over and done / A new one has begun! / Justin Bieber and Spaghetti Cat / Flying in a helium balloon / Yes, this is their cartoon!"

Followed by, in the style of a thwarted Scooby-Doo criminal: "Curses! Foiled again by the meddling cat and boy!"

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Quick Question

Let's say you are a sewist and textile lover who has declared a moratorium on fabric-buying (whether or not you have achieved SABLE). Further, let's say a fabric turns up that has Sneetches on it. And also The Lorax. Surely this event voids the moratorium, doesn't it? Doesn't it?

Especially if you have a five-year-old Sneetch-adoring niece with a birthday coming up, right? The undeniable fact that she has enough stuff already notwithstanding?

*backs slowly away from Fabric dot com*

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Wednesday Blogaround

This blogaround brought to you by Shaxco, publishers of Conniving & Sinister: The Story of Two Boring Assholes Who Mind Their Own Business.

Recommended Reading:

Veronica: Latina Week of Action for Reproductive Justice

[TW for rape apology] In Theorem: Sunday Morning Rape Apology

Andy: Costa Rica's High Court Protects Minority, Blocks Referendum on Gay Civil Unions

Angry Asian Man: Changing Lives, One Greeting Card at a Time

[TW for sexual harassment] Anna: Boss Fired for Helping Harassment Victim

Charlotte: This is what a fat activist looks like.

Leslie: no access = disability [Click on the image to be taken to a larger image in Leslie's photostream, with more explanation of the image. H/T to Eastsidekate.]

Leave your links in comments...

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Two Minute Nostalgia Sublime



Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra: "Baby Elephant Walk"

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So this lady wants to marry some guy

The BBC is reporting that a woman in Hong Kong is trying to marry her boyfriend.

Okaaaaaaaaay....

The issue is that doctors declared the woman in question, who we'll call "W" (because her lawyer didn't give the BBC her name) to be a boy back when she was in the hospital following her birth. Ergo, the government is under the impression that she and her boyfriend are both men.

Her lawyer isn't pressing that same-sex marriage should be legal, because, well, you know, this doesn't directly involve same-sex marriage.

I think it's pretty obvious that the ultimate solution to this situation is to make marriage between any consenting adults legal (along with, say, respecting trans people's identities). More radically, one might abolish government recognition of marriage altogether, and give everyone the right to control their household(s). But have you tried either of those lately? That shit takes forever.

Homophobic and transphobic societies put people like W and I in very nasty corners. I'm sure there are GL(b) activists reading this story who are angry that W isn't fighting with them, but I hardly see how W has any more of an obligation to fight for gay rights than any other person in a heterosexual relationship.

This brings us to my partner and I, who were married despite both being ladies who lived in Wisconsin, where that sort of thing isn't cool.

Here's the deal: governments don't want transsexual people to marry anyone, or to exist at all. We're kinda a pain that way. I mean, the woman at the county clerk's office didn't want to issue us a marriage license because 'Sir, your driver's license is fraudulent', I hardly think she was ready to let me marry a man.

Even when transsexual people do marry people of a different gender in places where same-sex marriage is illegal, [TW: transphobia and violence]challenges to their marriages can come at any time. This hardly makes trans peoples' marriages equal to those involving two cis people.

I'm not sure what my point is. I guess I'm just tired. My identity, and that of my trans family seems to be the keystone of just about each and every one of society's battles about sexuality. Often I hear people say that this means that we should be at the forefront of each and every one of these battles. I suppose I try, but that, my friends, is tiring.

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Quote of the Day

"[White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs' resignation would] be fair, because this isn't the first time [Gibbs has made untoward and inflammatory comments toward the activist left]. And, again, people of all political shades worked very hard to help the president become the president. Why would he want to go out and deliberately insult the president's base? And why would he confuse legitimate critique with some sort of lack of loyalty. Isn't this what the far right does? Punishes people who are not ideologically aligned with President Bush?"Representative Keith Ellison (D-Minnesota), a member of the Congressional Progressive Caucus, asking some excellent (rhetorical) questions and calling for a request of Gibbs' resignation as a show of good faith by the president that he "doesn't share [Gibbs'] view that the left is unimportant."

UPDATE: Ellison clarifies he is not overtly calling for Gibbs' resignation, but stands by his contention that Gibbs went too far.

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B-b-but CALORIES IN CALORIES OUT!!!

Four reasons some fat women aren't Bunsen burners.

The actual headline is: "Four surprising reasons women can't lose weight." I'm not sure how "surprising" something like PCOS is for the women who have it, but okay, whatever. It's a start.

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Obama Signs Law Banning Cell Phones in Federal Prison

Hmm:

Hoping to stop federal inmates from directing crimes from behind bars, President Barack Obama signed into law Tuesday a prohibition on cell phone use by prisoners.

...The Federal Bureau of Prisons confiscated more than 2,600 cell phones from minimum security facilities and nearly 600 from secure federal institutions last year.

"Now that this bill has become law, prison gangs will no longer be able to use cell phones to direct criminal attacks on individuals, to decide territory for the distribution of drugs, or conduct credit card fraud," said Sen. Diane Feinstein, D-California, a co-sponsor of the bill.

"Making it illegal for criminals to use cell phones and wireless devices in federal prison cuts their communication link and helps keep our communities safe," said her Republican counterpart, Sen. Charles Grassley, R-Iowa.

...The new law calls for a government study to be issued in a year to measure the effectiveness of the new prohibition.
The law not only bans cell phones, for which, according to a government report, inmates will pay up to $1,000, but other wireless devices as well—and "calls for up to a year in prison for anyone found guilty of trying to smuggle one to an inmate."

So, here's what bothers me about this law: There's no nuance. Someone found in possession of a mobile phone which zie has been using to coordinate criminal activity is not distinguishable under this statute from someone found in possession of a mobile phone which zie has been using to chat benignly with family members, or to speak with an attorney who's filing an appeal for a wrongful conviction.

I would hope that confiscation of any wireless device would be followed by an investigation into its use before formal charges were filed, but I suspect that most federal prisons won't be keen to use their discretion in the application of this law.

Especially when a conviction for possession means another sentence and more time served. Which is more money in the pockets of the corporations housing many of our federal prisoners in private/subcontracted prisons.

Ahem.

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Open Thread

Photobucket

Hosted by a Baby Elephant Walk(ing).

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Question of the Day

Following up on my earlier post about Linus and Locke!, if you were a Hollywood bigshot and were producing a show starring Michael Emerson and Terry O'Quinn, what would be the premise?

It could be a comedy, drama, reality show, a miniseries, a remake, an adaptation of a novel, anything. Let's hear it, Shakers!

Mine would be a re-imagining of Riptide.

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Shocking

Pew Research: Republicans Faring Better with Men, Whites, Independents and Seniors.

Well, I'm positively shocked to find out that the Republican Party is the party of old white men who are spittin' mad that other people get a say in America these days.

And then there's this:

The Republican Party's prospects for the midterm elections look much better than they did four years ago at this time, while the Democrats' look much worse. Voter preferences for the upcoming congressional elections remain closely divided (45% support the Democratic candidate or lean Democratic, while 44% favor the Republican or lean Republican).

...Republicans and conservatives continue express far greater interest in the election than do Democrats and liberals.
Huh. I wonder why that might be. Any ideas, Robert Gibbs?

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This is so the worst thing you're going to read all day.

[Trigger warning for sexual violence.]

So, this article in the New York Times is pretty much a textbook case in how the rape culture, and its erroneous narratives about being able to identify a rapist based on his appearance or behavior or personal circumstances, serves to protect rapists.

In meeting with Mr. Akassy, who is from Ivory Coast, Mr. Simmons said he found him to be an intelligent, "very well-spoken, very well-groomed, good-looking person."

"What I derived from his personality, I can't see him being this violent or raping any person," he said.

[...]

[A woman who was stalked by Akassy] went to the police, she said, and a detective took a report. The detective told her not to worry because Mr. Akassy's Web site, orbitetv.org, indicated that he was a public figure and therefore he was unlikely to "do anything stupid."
Note that one of the narratives of the rape culture is that women should be magically able to identify rapists to avoid becoming their victims...but when women correctly construe a man as a potential threat and report him to authorities for escalating harassment, their intuition is dismissed out of hand.

Can't win. Can't fucking win.

[H/T to Shaker Bruno.]

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Today's Edition of "Conniving and Sinister"



Blank

See Deeky's archive of all previous Conniving & Sinister strips here.

[In which Liss reimagines the long-running comic "Frank & Ernest," about two old straight white guys "telling it like it is," as a fat feminist white woman (Liss) and a biracial queerbait (Deeky) telling it like it actually is from their perspectives. Hilarity ensues.]

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The Inartful Dodger

White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs admits his comments calling liberals drug-addled ingrates were "inartful."

I watch too much cable, I admit. Day after day it gets frustrating. Yesterday I watched as someone called legislation to prevent teacher layoffs a bailout -- but I know that's not a view held by many, nor were the views I was frustrated about.

So what I may have said inartfully, let me say this way -- since coming to office in January 2009, this White House and Congress have worked tirelessly to put our country back on the right path. Most importantly, to dig our way out of a huge recession and build an economy that makes America more competitive and our middle class more secure. Some are frustrated that the change we want hasn't come fast enough for many Americans. That we all understand.

But in 17 months, we have seen Wall Street reform, historic health care reform, fair pay for women, a recovery act that pulled us back from a depression and got our economy moving again, record investments in clean energy that are creating jobs, student loan reforms so families can afford college, a weapons system canceled that the Pentagon didn't want, reset our relationship with the world and negotiated a nuclear weapons treaty that gets us closer to a world without fear of these weapons, just to name a few. And at the end of this month, 90,000 troops will have left Iraq and our combat mission will come to an end.

Even so, we will continue to work each day on the promises and commitments that the President made traveling all over this country for two years and produce the change we know is possible.

In November, America will get to choose between going back to the failed policies that got us into this mess, or moving forward with the policies that are leading us out.

So we should all, me included, stop fighting each other and arguing about our differences on certain policies, and instead work together to make sure everyone knows what is at stake because we've come too far to turn back now.
See, here's the thing: I do know what's at stake, and I still have fundamental policy differences with this administration. This constant assertion that I am (and people like me are) just too fucking stupid to understand politics and to grasp the importance of issues like healthcare reform is not endearing this administration to me. I am not a stupid person. I am not an uninformed person. I am not a naïve person. I am not an impatient person. I am not a person who insists on ideological purity.

I am also not a person who appreciates being expected to march in lockstep under the guise of "working together." As I have said before: It is, simply, not the duty of any person who is repeatedly subjected to alienating language, images, behaviors, and/or legislation to nonetheless never complain and pledge fealty from the margins. Gibbs' statement here is nothing more than the words of an articulate bully.

And let us be honest for a moment about his list of successes: We have not seen historic healthcare reform, but historic insurance reform—which is not to take away from the millions of people who will be helped by that legislation, but calling it something it just isn't, while simultaneously ignoring that the president broke faith with women to get it passed, is just another way of pretending the legitimate policy disagreements that many progressives have with the administration don't exist.

It's easier to call dissenting feminist/womanist progressives a bunch of crackpots when you disappear the valid complaints many of us have about the legislation the president has made the centerpiece of his first term.

Back to that list: I was hugely excited (and remain so) about the passage of the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act, but to assert that this administration achieved "fair pay for women" is absurd. Women are still (illegally) being paid less than their male counterparts all across the country, and what the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act did was increase the statute of limitations in which women who discover they are being paid unequally can sue.

If this administration really wanted to endure "fair pay for women," they would advocate an employment law that required employers to make public their employees' salaries, so every woman working in the US would have the ability to see whether she is being paid equally.

But they're never going to do that, because corporations save billions of dollars every year underpaying women. And this administration cares more about corporations than women.

So claiming to have guaranteed "fair pay for women" is a real stretch, and, I don't know about any other working women in the US, but I frankly don't appreciate being told that this administration has given me something it flatly hasn't delivered.

No less to have them turn around and tell me I'm too goddamn stupid to understand the nuances of Big Boy Politics.

Now, I could go on, but my point was to dismantle Gibbs' bullshit, not assert that the Obama administration has had no successes—because, clearly, I don't believe that to be the case.

I do believe, however, that this administration has adopted the deplorable tactics of their most ardent defenders during the election. Trying to bully people with legitimate grievances and policy differences into submission, trying to extort their support by threatening them with Things They'll Lose, was shitty behavior coming from a bunch of privileged fauxgressive wankstains who can't abide uppity girls and queers who don't believe in trickle-down social justice, and it's even shittier coming from the White House.

And P.S. Gibbs: Stop saying "this White House and Congress have worked tirelessly to put our country back on the right path" when Obama took 26 vacation days his first year in office (double that of the average US worker) and Congress is, as we speak, on its annual month-long summer recess. I don't begrudge Obama and Congress their time off, but get a clue, dude. The vast majority of people in this country (who are still fortunate enough to have a job) aren't getting a month off every year.

There are millions of US workers who get no paid vacation time at all. They're the ones "working tirelessly."

Well, actually, I'm sure they're fucking tired, but they don't have a goddamn choice but to keep working anyway—a reality with which Gibbs et. al. might be better acquainted if they weren't so ceaselessly occupied patting themselves on the back and whinging at their devastating lack of cookies.

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Today in Lost News

Coming soon: Linus and Locke!

In the tradtion of Hardcastle and McCormick, Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Simon and Simon, and Laverne & Shirley, comes a new breed of buddy cop dramedy: Linus and Locke!

Watch what happens when this real odd couple must work together as both partners on the force and as roommates! Every episode of Linus and Locke! will be filled with laughs, hi-jinx, and hard-hitting issues ripped from the headlines.

Or not. Maybe Linus and Locke! will be about an archeologist and his witty man-servant. Who knows?

Well, we do know Michael Emerson (Linus) and Terry O'Quinn (and Locke!) are shopping around for ideas for a TV show. I can't wait until they're back on the small screen.

[Cross-posted.]

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Former Senator Ted Stevens in Plane Crash

KTUU Anchorage:

Dave Dittman, a former aide and longtime family friend of former Sen. Ted Stevens, says Stevens was killed in a plane crash near Dillingham Monday night. Dittman says he received a call overnight Monday that said the former senator was dead, but no official confirmation has been made.

Nine people were on board, including former NASA Chief Sean O'Keefe. Five people were killed in the crash, but other identities were not known, nor are the conditions of the survivors.
According to the WaPo, there hasn't even yet been "confirmation that he actually got on the plane."

My suspicion is that Stevens did not survive the crash, but they are withholding confirmation until his family has had a chance to notify those close to him, so they don't find out from the news.

Stevens is probably best known professionally for being the longest-serving Republican Senator in history, for his role in championing and securing funding for the $400 million Bridge to Nowhere, for his conviction on corruption charges, and for coining the award-winning internet meme, "Series of Tubes."

To be perfectly blunt, precisely the approach Senator Stevens would have respected, I did not like the man as a public servant, which is the only capacity in which I had the opportunity to know him. But I offer my sincerest condolences to his family and friends.

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Daily Dose o' Cute


Matilda

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