Hiya, Shakers, time for another Discussion Thread for the Not Quite Daily Teaspoon Report!
This is the thread in which you may offer congratulations or admiration for a teaspoon or teaspooner. If you're posting with just congrats or admiration, though, do take a moment and check the thread to see whether other people have said so a number of times already – if not, then go for it! If you look at it from the right angle, praising someone's teaspoon can be one in itself.
Remember that no one is required to read here just because they posted over there, so there's no guarantee you'll get a response to a given comment.
NQDTR Discussion Thread – R100325
The Not Quite Daily Teaspoon Report – R100325
Time for another Teaspoon Report, brought to you by Shaxco, sponsors of Shakesville Meetups in Chicago!
Leave comments here that describe an act of teaspooning you encountered or committed. They don't have to be big, world-shaking acts. By definition, a teaspoon is a small thing, but enough of them together can empty the ocean. Don’t feel you have to minimize your accomplishments here. You can and should feel pride in every single act you undertake to improve the human condition, even those you don’t tell us about. Doing good things can be an enjoyable end in itself.
If you would like to discuss the teaspoons here reported, or even offer congratulations or your admiration to a fellow Shaker, we ask that you do so over here in the Discussion Thread for today's NQDTR.
Shaker bgk has been kind enough to get a Twitter-pated version out there for you young twittersnappers (and by the way, get off my lawn, you meddling kids! *shakes cane*). You can find the details about the Tweetspoons project right here. That runs all the time, as far as I'm aware (*grumblenewtechnologygrumble*), and we encourage you to let other people know that there's at least one tweetstream talking about just going out and doing good things for the human species.
Teaspoons up, let's hear 'em, Shakers!
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He's An Artiste!
Shakers, let us now have a conversation about James Franco's TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE short story in Esquire: "Just Before the Black."
In 3,000 words, he manages to cram in racism, misogyny, homophobia, disablism, rape references, and some serious fat hatred. He literally uses the word fat nine times (nine times!) in 3,000 words, as well as "large," "blubbery," "lardass," "slug," and several charming metaphors like "his weight spreads from his belly across the seat, like it was a plastic sack full of liquid, rolling in layers upon itself."
And yet, somehow, I'm still most horrified by the fact that he included this line:
"The building is beige, but the shadows make it shadow-color."
Which I have literally been LOLLING about for like ten straight minutes.
Save Me from Myself, Skinny Jesus Chef!
Thank Maude for the British—because, without Kim and Aggie teaching us how to clean our homes, and Jo Frost teaching us how to raise our kids, and Victoria Stilwell teaching us how to control our dogs, and Trinny and Susannah teaching us how to dress ourselves, and Simon Cowell teaching us how to sing, and Nigel Lithgoe teaching us how to dance, Americans would be naked, cultureless beasts who lived in garbage heaps with feral children and wild dogs.
This is all true.
The latest Brit in the British How-To Invasion is "Naked Chef" Jamie Oliver, whose new show I Hate Fat People Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution features Oliver traveling to Huntington, West Virginia—the Obesitiest Place in the Multiverse!—where he was determined to use his "magic" to help Huntington's Fatties get less fat. I mean, healthier!
The reality series based on this generous thin martyr giving up his time to help stupid fat people premieres tomorrow night. But! By the magic of the internetz, you can watch it here right now!
If you can't view the video, here's a quick summary: Headless fatties? Check. Enormous food stock footage? Check. OHNOES Obesity CrisisTM? Check. Being fat is ugly? Check. Fat people are lazy? Check. Fat people are stupid? Check. Fat people are sick? Check. DEATHFAT? Check. Mother-blaming for fat kids? Check. Fat as a moral failure? Check. Religious shaming of fat? Check. Fat people don't have "the tools" to not be fat? Check. Fat people need a skinny savior? Checkity-check-check!
I want to note that there is, buried somewhere beneath the 10 metric fucktons of fat-shaming (and not an incidental dose of misogyny, for good measure), information about healthful eating (e.g. not eating any fresh veg, ever, isn't good for anyone), but this is information that could be delivered without a scene in which a mother of four whose husband is gone three weeks a month is told that she's killing her children while she's weeping at her kitchen table.
The premiere episode has absolutely zero structural critique, not even a passing comment about the reason that millions of mothers feed their kids processed foods is because it's cheap and fast, which is a pretty good solution for people who are short on money and time.
Oliver places the responsibility for unhealthful eating exclusively at the feet of the individual, seemingly without concern for the cultural dynamics that inform individual choices. The extent of the explanation provided for why someone might choose to stock their freezer with frozen pizzas is that they're lazy and/or don't know any better.
And then he wonders why he isn't greeted by the citizens of Huntington with open arms.
At the end of the episode, a newspaper article comes out in which Oliver's evident contempt for the community has been reported. Oliver claims his words were taken out of context; the people with whom he's been working to revamp elementary school meals don't believe him—and understandably so, given that he's been a patronizing ass to them.
In the final scene, Oliver speaks directly to the camera, and he is crying, wiping tears from his eyes as he throws himself a little pity party:
It's quite hard to cut through negativity, always. And defensiveness. You know, I'm giving up massive time that is really compromising my family—because I care! You know, um, the tough thing for me [exhales deeply] is they don't understand me, 'cuz they don't know why I'm here. [sniffs] They don't even know what I've done, the things I've done in the last ten years! And I'm just doing it 'cuz it feels right [sniffs], and when I do things that feels right, magic happens! [sniffs; shakes his head disbelievingly] I've done some amazing things, you know? And that's when I follow my heart. And when I never follow my heart, I always get it wrong.Wow.
Look, I'm gonna be really honest: You do live in an amazing country. You put people on the moon! You live in an amazing country. And so do I, you know? And, right now in time, is a moment where we're all confused about how brilliant we are and how technically advanced we are, and that is fighting with what once made our countries great, which is family, community, being together, and something honestly as simple as putting a few ingredients together and sitting your family or your friends or your girlfriend or your mother-in-law around that table and breaking bread. And if you think that's not important, then shame on you!
In an interview to promote the show, Oliver says, "You can't really blame the parents when the whole culture and the whole horizon of food is all the same." Which is an interesting comment from someone who chose a scene where he's telling a mother she's killing her kids for the premiere episode of his show.
That underlines a key problem with Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution: He doesn't want to be seen as the guy who blames parents for killing their kids and shaming fat people for being fat—but there he is in his show, blaming parents for killing their kids and shaming fat people for being fat. Oops.
And, on top of it, he ends the premiere episode by crying because those goddamn fat ingrates don't appreciate him.
Reportedly, Huntington eventually warmed up to Oliver, but I don't think I'll be sticking around to watch that happy ending unfold.
And, for the record, Mr. Oliver, the "whole horizon of food" is actually not all the same in the US: In some places, things are much, much worse.
It All Depends on What You Mean by "Safer"
[Trigger warning.]
A security guard at Heathrow Airport was issued a harassment warning after he "ogled" a female colleague who walked through a body scanner. The body scanners:
were introduced at Heathrow and Manchester airports to check for concealed weapons and explosives following the failed Christmas Day bomb plot by Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab to blow up a jet over Detroit in the United States.They're supposed to be a security/safety measure designed to reassure passengers.
But, this incident and learning what, exactly, the machines reveal, make the scanners seem decidedly unsafe. Another article described them in this way:
The full-body scanners take "naked" images, revealing everything under someone's clothes - including a clear outline of genitals.They violate a very basic sense of privacy and they allow that violation to be repeated over and over everyday.
We learned of this case because the security guard made "lewd" comments to his co-worker after she was scanned and she reported it. What about all the guards who might "ogle" in silence? And I, at least, feel quite insecure, knowing that my body could be on display, to someone I don't know, in a manner I didn't choose. That is the price I must pay to travel? I think it's a bit steep.
Last fall, I re-read a piece by Angela Davis (or maybe I heard her say it), in which she noted how we have increasingly problematic definitions of what will "keep us safe." Her focus was our (U.S.) fascination with locking people up to make us "safer." I've also heard Alexis Pauline Gumbs speak to our reliance on defense and force to make us feel safe rather than things like education, eradication of poverty, community building, and being good global citizens. I think we increasingly face the questions of how to define safety and how much (and who) are we willing to trade in the name of being safe?"
H/T to Shaker TheBaldSoprano
Catholic Church Fails To Protect Children (Again)
[Trigger-warning.]
This is real fucked up:
Top Vatican officials — including the future Pope Benedict XVI — did not defrock a priest who molested as many as 200 deaf boys, even though several American bishops repeatedly warned them that failure to act on the matter could embarrass the churchI really wish I could say something insightful or compelling here, but the above just about covers it. Of course, my favourite part is this little nugget:
The internal correspondence from bishops in Wisconsin directly to Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, the future pope, shows that while church officials tussled over whether the priest should be dismissed, their highest priority was protecting the church from scandal.
The Wisconsin case involved an American priest, the Rev. Lawrence C. Murphy, who worked at a renowned school for deaf children from 1950 to 1974.
In 1993, with complaints about Father Murphy landing on his desk, [Wisconsin] Archbishop Weakland hired a social worker specializing in treating sexual offenders to evaluate him. After four days of interviews, the social worker said that Father Murphy had admitted his acts, had probably molested about 200 boys and felt no remorse.
Father Murphy not only was never tried or disciplined by the church’s own justice system, but also got a pass from the police and prosecutors who ignored reports from his victims, according to the documents and interviews with victims. Three successive archbishops in Wisconsin were told that Father Murphy was sexually abusing children, the documents show, but never reported it to criminal or civil authorities.
[Emphasis mine.]
[T]he effort to dismiss Father Murphy came to a sudden halt after the priest appealed to Cardinal Ratzinger for leniency.That's right. The Vatican, under the direction of a future Pope, stopped it's own internal investigation and failed to involve local authorities to protect an admitted child molester. Jebus fucking Christ...
Feel the Hopey Changeyness!
Pentagon prepares to relax enforcement of Don't Ask Don't Tell. Ooh, relax enforcement. How sexy! How progressive! How totally not good enough.
The Pentagon is scheduled to announce Thursday that it will relax enforcement of the "don't ask, don't tell" rules that prevent gay men and lesbians from serving openly in the military, a decision that officials described as a temporary measure until Congress can take permanent action.Good on the Pentagon for doing what they can. But, it's like, how fucking hard is it to get this shit done already? Infuriatingly, this is yet another example of where Obama won't be a fucking leader. If the Democratic president told Democratically-led Congress to get it done now, they'd get it done now. But he's all, "Um whut? Well, hey, it's up to Congress! Don't look at me!"
Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates is expected to announce that the military will no longer investigate the sexual orientation of service members based on anonymous complaints, will restrict testimony from third parties and will require high-ranking officers to review all cases, sources familiar with the changes said.
And the thing that's really irksome is that this is the perfect time to do it, when everyone's paying attention to healthcare. Instead, let's drag it out and then claim we can't do it six months from now because it's TOO CLOSE TO ELECTIONS! And everyone knows that getting reelected is way more important than PRINCIPLES!
[Cue someone patronizingly explaining to me How Politics Works, without a trace of irony that Obama was elected on the explicit promise to change How Politics Works. It would be hilarious, if it weren't so goddamn tragic.]
Important Announcement
Joe Biden is the only adult in America who uses "the f word." SCANDALOUS! He's a horrible human being! Worse even than the last vice president, who outed a CIA agent and condoned torture! We should talk about Joe Biden's potty mouth FOREVER!!!
FOREVER!!111!!!!!!1!!eleventy!!!1!
Question of the Day
Since Hollywood has officially given up, and is now just remaking old films and television shows... What movie or television show would you like to see remade?
And why? And got any good casting ideas? Etc.
What made me think of this question actually was posting an obit for Robert Culp. I loved The Greatest American Hero as a kid (and do still, actually), and I was just thinking about how that's a television show I wouldn't mind seeing remade.
And I would totes cast Jorge Gargia in the lead role. And Ken Leung as Agent [Maxwell]. Or vice versa.
RIP Robert Culp
Actor Robert Culp, star of the television series I, Spy and The Greatest American Hero, as well as about a zillion other things, has died at age 79 after reportedly falling during a walk and hitting his head.
Culp also had starring roles in such films as "The Castaway Cowboy," "Golden Girl," "Turk 182!" and "Big Bad Mama II."It's a fairly reliable generational predictor whether one recalls Culp more vividly as CIA Agent Kelly Robinson or FBI Agent Bill Maxwell. Believe it or not, it's just meeeeee...
His teaming with Cosby, however, was likely his best remembered role.
Cosby won Emmys for actor in a leading role all three years that "I Spy" aired, and Culp, who was nominated for the same award each year, said he was never jealous.
"I was the proudest man around," he said in a 1977 interview.
Both he and Cosby were involved in civil rights causes, and when Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated in 1968 the pair traveled to Memphis, Tenn., to join the striking garbage workers King had been organizing.
[Note: If there are less flattering things to be said about Culp, they have been excluded because I am unaware of them, not as the result of any deliberate intent to whitewash his life. Please feel welcome to comment on the entirety of his work and life in this thread.]
Quote of the Day
"This is embarrassing and personal, but once a month, since I was twelve years old, I go to my favorite jewelry store and try on my dream ring."—Jennifer Love Hewitt, in her new book The Day I Shot Cupid: Hello, My Name Is Jennifer Love Hewitt, and I'm A Love-aholic by Jennifer Love Hewitt.
Linda Holmes, from whom I got the quote, points out that this means Jennifer Love Hewitt, age 31, has made "roughly 225 trips to the jewelry store" to try on an engagement ring.
Oh dear.
I suspect she's got a busy schedule producing her upcoming film, The Day I Shot Cupid: Hello My Name Is Jennifer Love Hewitt, and I'm A Love-aholic, based on the book by Jennifer Love Hewitt starring Jennifer Love Hewitt, but I really want to give Jennifer Love Hewitt a hug and talk some Feminism 101 with her. And maybe more hugs. And tea.
Oh Dear Maude
If you can't view the video, it's footage (unnarrated; the audio is just ambient noise) of former presidents Clinton and Dubs Bush visiting Haiti. Bush reaches out to shake someone's hand, then makes a little "eww grody" hand gesture, then wipes his hand on Clinton's shirt. (Screencaps below.)
[Click to embiggen.]
Stay classy, Dubs. [Via Chris.]
Haiti Relief: Donate to CARE.org. Donate to Water.org. Donate to Doctors Without Borders.
Wednesday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by Shaxco, insurers of Deeky's Star Wars Action Figure Collection. And Liss' legs.
Recommended Reading:
Marcella: KBR Drops Supreme Court Appeal Against Jamie Leigh Jones
Shark-fu: Back Up Your Birth Control!
Andy: Gay Georgia Teen's Parents Kick Him Out After Prom Story Breaks
Renee: Weight Loss Guru Susan Powter Attacks Gabourey Sidibe
Fannie: A Christian Message on the Importance of Fathers
Pilgrim Soul: Let's Call a Moratorium on Articles on the State of Feminism for a While, OK?
Leave your links in comments...
Neither Is This
Nope, totally not terrorism:
Reps. Louise Slaughter and Bart Stupak have received death threats.
Vandals broke windows at Slaughter’s office in New York and Rep. Gabrielle Giffords’s office in Arizona.
Slaughter, a Democrat who chairs the House Rules Committee, said a caller to her office last week vowed to send snipers to “kill the children of the members who voted yes.”
Stupak, the Michigan Democrat whose last-minute compromise on abortion guaranteed passage of the bill Sunday, said callers have left messages for him saying, “You’re dead; we know where you live; we’ll get you.”
Totally Not Terrorism
Fuck:
Federal and local authorities are investigating a severed gas line at the home of U.S. Rep. Tom Perriello's brother, discovered the day after Tea Party activists posted the address online so opponents could "drop by" and "express their thanks" for Perriello's vote in favor of health care reform.The address was posted because the "activists" mistakenly believed it belonged to the congressman, not his older brother, Bo Perriello.
[H/T to Shaker Museclio.]
Today's Edition of "Conniving and Sinister"
[Background.]
See Deeky's archive of all previous Conniving & Sinister strips here.
[In which Liss reimagines the long-running comic "Frank & Ernest," about two old straight white guys "telling it like it is," as a fat feminist white woman and a biracial queerbait telling it like it actually is from their perspectives. Hilarity ensues.]
Random YouTubery
Sometimes, I see something on youtube that leaves me utterly speechless.
And as Liss will attest, it's really hard to de-speechify me.
h/t Crooks and Liars
