Hosted by The Clown With the Tear-Away Face.
Question of the Day
It's a spooky Halloween QOTD! Booooo!
What used to scare the bejeezus out of you when you were a kid that seems completely innocuous now?
When I was a kid, I was terrified of this vintage skeleton Halloween decoration we would hang on the front door. Now I think it's awesome. (Sorry about the blurry photo; it was the only one I could find of this particular decoration.)
Nothing cartoony about that guy; it was just a HORRIBLE SKELETON COMING TO GET YOU AIIIEEE.
Non-Halloween related, I was also completely pants-wetting freaked by the Jester guy at the end of the "King of Eight" segment on Sesame Street. But the rest of it was so cool that I would sit there with my hand on the volume knob watching the segment. When I knew he was coming, I'd turn the volume down and look the other way until I knew he was gone.
And you?
Photo of the Day
Cameroon—At the Sanaga-Yong Chimpanzee Rescue Center, more than a dozen residents form a gallery of grief, looking on as Dorothy—a beloved female felled in her late 40s by heart failure—is borne to her burial.The photo was taken by Monica Szczupider, who explains: "Her presence, and loss, was palpable, and resonated throughout the group. The management at Sanaga-Yong opted to let Dorothy's chimpanzee family witness her burial, so that perhaps they would understand, in their own capacity, that Dorothy would not return. Some chimps displayed aggression while others barked in frustration. But perhaps the most stunning reaction was a recurring, almost tangible silence. If one knows chimpanzees, then one knows that [they] are not [usually] silent creatures."
[Via Andy.]
Um, Okay
[My mom] did what she did and didn't care what people thought. But as a kid, I was like, 'Oh, dear God, please make her stop and be normal.' I wanted an ordinary mom. My sister, Gesine, and I were lucky enough to be raised by a mother who did things unconventionally, and a father who was fine with the kids being raised that way. There was no gender in our house. I didn't realize that I couldn't do what boys could do, because my dad raised me as a boy.There was no gender in our house…my dad raised me as a boy.
You see, because male is default human and to be female means you have a gender.
(From the same interview, I also love: "If you don't have kids and animals, you don't truly know what real life is about." I never tire of being told I am incomplete because I do not want to be a parent. Wheeeeee!)
Quote of the Day
"That's just a strange coincidence. When you do so many vetoes, that's bound to happen."—Aaron McLear, spokesperson for California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, on the subtext found in the note accompanying the governor's veto of a bill sponsored by Assemblyman Tom Ammiano, who reportedly shouted "You lie!" at Schwarzenegger during a Democratic Party fund-raiser in San Francisco earlier this month.
The Independent reports that the mathematical probability of such an unorchestrated "strange coincidence" is 8,031,810,176 to 1.
Today's Edition of "Conniving and Sinister"
Strips One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57. In which Liss reimagines the long-running comic "Frank & Ernest," about two old straight white guys "telling it like it is," as a fat feminist white woman and a biracial queerbait telling it like it actually is from their perspectives. Hilarity ensues.
Halloween Costumes
I've been on the search for a new costume for this year's Halloween festivities, because A) I enjoy dressing up, and 2) my gorilla outfit is getting old. I've had no real luck.
My co-workers have been trying to get me to purchase a Captain America costume so I can participate in their little superhero theme, but until fags can legally get married everywhere in this country, this fag is not dressing up as Captain America. It's a matter of principle. Plus, I just don't like superheroes. Or my co-workers.
I did find this awesome thing, and would have bought it if I could have somehow rationalized spending the seventy bucks it would have set me back:
Maybe next year.
[Cross-posted.]
Actual Headline
Exclusive: Kate Hudson and Alex Rodriguez "Love Sex," Says Pal.
Now, just on its own, that's a completely absurd "news" headline, even for entertainment news. (And calling it an exclusive is positively hilarious.) I could write an entire post on how a headline breathlessly announcing a famous couple "love sex" is emblematic of a celebrity culture in which every mundane detail of the personal lives of public figures are commoditized and packaged for public consumption in a way unhealthy for both consumed and consumer.
But today I'm more interested in the fact that this "news story"—including "exclusive" details like "Apparently, New York Yankee Alex Rodriguez is a homerun in the bedroom. That's what girlfriend Kate Hudson has been telling close pals" and "Hudson, 30, is aware of Rodriguez's playboy rep: During his five-year marriage to wife Cynthia, he stepped out with stripper Joslyn Noel Morse; another fling recalls portraits of the slugger as a centaur hanging over his bed" and "Rodriguez, 34, has confided that Hudson means more to him than Madonna, whom he dated after his 2008 split with wife Cynthia" (did you get all that? because if not, let me reiterate it for you: ALEX RODRIGUEZ LOVES SEX WITH LOTS OF WOMEN!)—comes just a week after a photo of A-Rod squeezing Derek Jeter's ass flew 'round the internetz.
Anytime a male public figure is plagued by rumors of Teh Dreaded Gay Ohnoes! there are stories about how hot the sex he's having with his partner are. Following a new round of rumors about Tom Cruise and Will Smith this summer, Cruise's wife Katie Holmes put him on a sex diet, and Smith's wife Jada Pinkett Smith spent her interviews promoting her new series talking about the couple's hot sex life.
This sort of spin dates back to Liberace (who totes loved the ladies for realz!), but in recent years it's becoming increasingly explicit, which ultimately serves to turn the female partners as sex props. Women who are famous in their own right, who had their own successful careers, are now so thoroughly objectified as Trophies of Heterosexuality in the couple's PR, that even a legit relationship looks like a staged partnership between a Very Important Man and the human evidence of his straightness.
Another hideous intersection between the misogyny that defines women as the sex class and the homophobia that makes "gay" the worst thing any famous man could be.
[Commenting Note: Please consider as you comment that observations like "Duh, of course they love sex! Who doesn't?!" will be alienating to asexual Shakers. "Loving sex" is not axiomatic; there is no assertion in the post that it is, and comments to that effect are not on-topic.]
What the Hell?
Shaker Filthy Grandeur
The missing Olsen Twin.
(If you've a ridiculous and/or embarrassing photo of yourself from your youth, please send it to shakerwhatthehell_at_yahoo_dot_com. I'll post them up as part of our series called What The Hell? so everyone can laugh
[See also: Deeky, Liss, evilsciencechick, katecontinued, ClumsyKisses, Mistress Sparkletoes, Liiiz, Reedme, Mama Shakes, Mustang Bobby, RedSonja, MomTFH, Portly Dyke, SteffaB, Icca, Christina, Orangelion03, Car, Siobhan, InfamousQBert, Maud, Rikibeth, MishaRN, CLD, Cheezwiz, MamaCarrie, Temeraire, somebodyoranother, goldengirl, Liss (again), summerwing, yeomanpip, Susan811, bbl, Deeky (Part II), A Daily Shakesville Fan, Sami_J, liberalandproud Temeraire: Redux, Mama Shakes II, Bonus Deeky, OuyangDan, J.Goff, Iain, Talonas, The Great Indoors, gogo, kiwi_a, em_and_ink, Tik_bev, phdintraining, Deeky Freakhands, busydani, Jenny Anne, rowmyboat, DesertRose, Steve/Pido, Anne Onymous, phredrika, The Last of the Famous International Deekys, Iain, Another Mustang Bobby, mkp-hearts-nyc, Arvan, Norbizness, Electrasteph, SteffaB, molliecat, Aestas, and catvoncat.]
Shaker Help Request
by an Anonymous Shaker
I was dismayed and surprised last night to discover, in a pile of my 11 year old son's school papers, a page torn from one of our local free newspapers. More specifically, this page was from the "personals" section, the rather euphemistic heading under which "escort agencies" advertise their services with colour pictures of the scantily clad or nude woman they have for sale. (They advertise for male escorts as well, but this page was all women).
Issues of consent and coercion are regular topics of conversation around our home, and we strive to raise both our kids with a sex-positive and open atmosphere and to our credit, our son frequently espouses feminist ideals and has a good concept of intersectionality. He is an advocate for GLBTIQ acceptance and speaks loudly against racism and ablism. I'm quite proud of him.
He is also at the very beginning of puberty, and it's clear that he's starting to seek out sexual imagery, no doubt to both answer his curiosities and to provide himself with, well, let's call it "inspiration."
Several things about this seem obvious to me: Obviously, we are going to have to have a talk about these advertisements. Obviously, he is seeking visual stimuli which is available and easy to obtain for an 11 year old and obviously he is going to experiment with all manners of things sexual over the next ten years or so. My problem, which is probably also obvious, is that I am concerned about these images (and moreso their context) informing what I'm fairly certain are his very early forays into masturbation. While he is well-educated about women's issues and I'm sure will display a good understanding of the problems of prostitution and the commodification of women when we talk about it, the subconscious mind is a powerful thing, and this is not imagery that I'm comfortable seeing imprinted onto his sexual development.
To complicate matters, we've spent the last few months ensuring that our home ceases to receive any magazines, catalogues or advertisements that we feel will encourage an unhealthy body image in our eight year old daughter, who seems all too eager to meet others expectations at the expense of her own individuality, so he doesn't have any of the classic standbys such as the Victoria's Secret catalogue, or mislabelled issues of Cosmo or whatever. (Which I tend to think would be the lesser of the evils.)
I think that a direct recommendation of what amounts to masturbation fodder from any of his parents would leave him feeling embarrassed and possibly create discomfort with or shame about his sexuality (particuarly following a discussion about women as a commodity), so I'm asking the Shakesville community for some advice on how to allow my son to explore his burgeoning sexuality in a more positive way, without compromising my daughter in the process. Can anyone offer me some advice on how to subtly guide him towards some more positive imagery? (Advice on the talk about the advertisements would not go unwanted, either, though I have a much better idea of how to address that issue, you lot often think of things that I haven't, as well.)
In the interest of protecting my son's privacy, I've asked Melissa to keep my identity anonymous. I ask that if any of you here recognize me or my son in these details, that you respect his privacy as well, and keep it to yourself.
Thanks, A Shaker
GWM Seeks Same
Recently spotted in the personal ads:
Earring Magic Ken (AKA Cockring Ken), circa 1993, was the gayest Ken ever created. Until Sugar Daddy Ken hit the scene. And yes, this photo was taken at my desk at work.
Tired of all the circuit boys and flakes? Fit, attractive 20-something looking for distinguished gentleman for late-night walks, romantic movies and conversation. I'm into travel and fine dining and designer clothes. Looking for friendship and possible LTR. Versatile.
[Cross-posted.]
What?
Barbie Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken, onsale April 2010.
No, seriously:
Barbie Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken Doll Description:Only $81.99!
• Head to Palm Beach with Barbie!
• Part of the elite Gold Label Collection, made with collectors in mind!
• Includes accessories and a certificate of authenticity.
Cool sophistication in breezy Palm Beach! Sporting a dashing jacquard-patterned jacket with a light pink polo shirt and crisp white pants, Ken doll is ready for Palm Beach social season, sunning by the pool and a stroll with his little companion. Fashion designed exclusively for the Silkstone Barbie doll body. Includes Ken doll, jacket, pink polo shirt, white shoes, dog with leash, swim trunks and accessories, doll stand and certificate of authenticity. For the adult collector. Order yours today!
I am very, very confused but equally intrigued by you, Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken. Part of me is recoiling in abject horror; the other part longs desperately for you, my precious. And your little dog, too.
Top Chef Open Thread
Chef Tom Colicchio will drink. your. milkshake!!!
He would also like to know how you feel about a big hunk of meat slathered in some luscious sauce.
'Cuz he'll totes cook that shit up for you, yo.
What did you think he meant?!
Question of the Day
What's the best movie title ever?
I give it up to Sasquatch Mountain. It's about a sasquatch and a mountain.
