I went through and picked some of my favorite old pix of the girls today, for maximum cuteness on a rough day. Here are some classic snaps of catitude from Shakes Manor...
Olivia
Sophie
And one from the Wayback Machine: Sophs of Improbable Tininess
Daily Kitteh
Olivia
Sophie
And one from the Wayback Machine: Sophs of Improbable Tininess
I Know What You’re Thinking
"What the world really needs is a special barbecue book FOR THE LADIES," amiright?
Fortunately for all you wimminz who've been too intimidated by your grill-hogging menfolk to "take your place back at the fire," this blatant deficiency in the world of cookbook publishing has been remedied.
Enter She-Smoke—a book of barbecue recipes, advice, and stories from "smokin' women" by Seattle restaurateur Julie Reinhardt. You may not have been aware that women need to "stand up for our barbecue rights," but once you read a few pages of She-Smoke, you'll understand that the typical American woman suffers from "firephobia," believes that her "grill could blow up at any moment," feels "iffy with big hunks of raw meat," and thinks barbecue is "scary."
But aside from learning not to "fear the fire," what gender-specific barbecue knowledge, you might wonder, are women lacking? Well, for the most part, Reinhardt's book reads pretty much like any guide to backyard barbecue, with tips about how to light a fire, how (and how long) to cook various meats, and so forth. Leave out the constant, cutesy references to "kickass 'cue girls," "smokin' barbecue blazers," and "knife-wielding babes," and what you're left with is actually a pretty good, if basic, guide to barbecueing and grilling that would be appropriate for any novice, man or woman.
So why "She-Smoke"? Obviously, it's a marketing gimmick—reel the ladies in with the one barbecue book directed at them—so I'm inclined to ignore the fact that it dresses up finding yet another way to cook for men as "female empowerment." In any case, as someone who owns several barbecue books (and several dozen cookbooks) myself, I'm betting this tactic's going to backfire. When I look for a book on an unfamiliar subject, I don't pick up the one whose color or cover or title seems best marketed to my demographic. (Oooh, pink!) I buy whichever one seems the best. You know, kind of
like a man would.
Cross-posted.
Rove Asks Vulcans to Represent
In his latest asshatious (that's my new word today) spew in today's WSJ, Turd Blossom seems to imply that all of the current justices on the Supreme Court are Vulcan:
There is a certain irony in a president who routinely praises America’s commitment to "the rule of law" but who picks Supreme Court nominees for their readiness to discard the rule of law whenever emotion moves them.Be careful what you wish for, Turd. After all, the rule of law clearly states that torture is illegal in every circumstance, regardless of the "emotion" behind wanting to protect the country.
[Thanks to Liss for the graphic and see also: Penny for Your Thoughtfulness and Hysterical Bitch.]
Just So My Head Doesn't Explode from Crapitude
Because Sarah Haskins could not rock any harder.
But What About the Menz?!
Given my previous four posts today, I am feeling even less inclined to be charitable about this shit than I would be normally, which on any given day would typically range from "profoundly contemptuous" to "overtly hostile," anyway.
Long story short: Some privileged white dudebro at the University of Chicago publishes a "satirical" column about forming a group called "Men in Power" to help men get ahead professionally, since "recent job losses hit men harder" (no, no, and no) and "women earn far more bachelor's and master's degrees than do men" (a pointless observation as long as women still need at least one degree more than their male counterparts to make as much money). Other privileged dudebros then clamored for "Men in Power" to be made real in response to the "satirical" column, the satire of which must obviously be questioned in light of the fact that its author decided to launch the "male advocacy group" in earnest.
There's an infinitesimal part of me that feels obliged to expend an enormous amount of energy explaining everything that's problematic with this idea, but the rest of me has better things to do than waste my time trying to boil down nearly five years of archives into one digestible post to educate members of a group for whom the campus' dozen or so feminist groups and gender-neutral student business groups weren't sufficient to pursue the goals of exploring gender and "help[ing] men get ahead professionally."
("Get ahead" of whom, one wonders? Why not "help men achieve professionally" or "succeed professionally" or anything that doesn't imply competition? Interesting, that.)
Suffice it to say, I hardly believe for a moment that a group calling itself "Men in Power" with an evidently serious belief that men need an advocacy group to achieve parity with women (!) is not "pursuing a sexist agenda." No one with a comprehensive understanding of contemporary gender disparities and a modicum of empathy for the marginalized could found and participate in a group called "Men in Power" with a straight face. Totally ignorant. Positively shameless.
[H/T to Shakers Angelos and Constant Comment.]
Hysterical Bitch
That may as well be the headline on this Chicago Tribune article about Sonia Sotomayor, though the actual headline is: "While at Yale, Sotomayor made a law firm apologize."
Bad enough on its own for the Oh Noes Castrating Harpy factor, but, once you read the details, combined with the story framing, which itself is just eighteen different shades of rage-inducing obnoxious, it's even worse:
The early White House story line on Sonia Sotomayor emphasizes her pragmatism and a cautious, measured approach to the law developed over a years-long climb from exceedingly modest circumstances to become the first Hispanic nominee to the Supreme Court.So, in fact, Sotomayor didn't "make a law firm apologize" at all, but a law firm was ordered by an independent panel to apologize to her for none-too-subtle racism during a job interview.
But an incident in the fall of 1978 illustrates another side of Sotomayor. Then a daring and assertive Yale University law student, she took a stand against a white-shoe Washington law firm that could have jeopardized her career.
While interviewing for jobs during her final year of school, she accused the firm, then known as Shaw, Pittman, Potts & Trowbridge, of discriminating against her by asking questions about the qualifications of Puerto Ricans and other minorities.
Sotomayor's complaint caused a campus furor. A student-faculty panel found the complaint warranted and ordered Shaw Pittman to write her a letter of apology.
And I just love (where love = hate with the fiery passion of ten thousand suns) how reporting the firm's inappropriate (now criminal) behavior is proffered as contradictory evidence to her reputation as pragmatic and cautious, as if risk-taking isn't frequently the result of pragmatic and cautious deliberation.
No—of course when it's women, especially women of color, who take a risky stand against institutional discrimination, they are
We women, we're just so impulsive with our silly ladybrains.
What makes this article extra super-duper aggravating is that it's a painfully obvious sop to the "she's a racist" brigade, thinly veiled behind an "innocuous" report about Sotomayor being an alarmist hysteric ("bitch"), which itself is presented under a guise of honoring her feistiness. Barf.
Shaker Gourmet: Spaghetti Carbonara
Speaking of mistressparklestoes, she gives us our recipe this week!
If you'd like to participate in Shaker Gourmet, email me at: shakergourmet (at) gmail.comSpaghetti Carbonara
Ingredients:
4 slices cooked bacon, crispy & crumbled (optional)
8 oz spaghetti, uncooked
small head of broccoli, cut into bite-size pieces (optional)
4 eggs or egg substitute
1/2 cup grated Parmesan
1 tbsp minced garlic
salt & pepper to taste
Directions:
1. Bring a large pot of water to boil. Add spaghetti and begin cooking according to package directions.
2. Mix together eggs or egg substitute, Parmesan, garlic, and salt & pepper.
3. Add the broccoli to the boiling pasta during the last 3-5 minutes of cooking.
4. Reserve 1 cup of hot pasta water to use if your carbonara becomes too thick.
5. Drain broccoli & pasta.
6. Stir egg mixture vigorously into hot pasta mixture until the cheese is melted and the sauce has thickened. Add reserved pasta water gradually if the mixture seems too thick. (It probably will.)
7. Serve topped with bacon (optional) and eat while watching "Breaking Bad" (mandatory).
8. Pat tummy and wipe the cheese off your teeth.
Random YouTubery: The Muppet Show - Hamlet/Brush Up Your Shakespeare
Because I really need a laugh right now, and I figure I'm not the only one.
Chris Reeve fills in for Gonzo as Hamlet when Gonzo sprains his nose. From Episode 418
Why Blame Your Victim When the Judge Will Do It for You?
[Trigger warning, and I am about to go back to fucking bed.]
Brian Gibbs, a "mild-manned" 63-year-old man, has been sentenced to four and a half years in prison after pushing his wife of 35 years down the stairs and stabbing her in the neck with scissors in a "moment of madness."
In delivering his sentence—the result of an apparent plea bargain; Gibbs "admitted wounding with intent," almost certainly avoiding a more serious sentence for attempted murder, which, in Britain, carries a sentence up to life in prison—the judge expressed enormous sympathy for poor Mr. Gibbs, whose wife had been cheating on him with his best friend.
Judge Peter Thornton told Gibbs: "This attack, however inexplicable in its ferocity, did have an explanation.Any bets on whether Mrs. Gibbs, who is a martial arts instructor, would have been afforded the same sympathy if it had been she who attacked an unfaithful husband with a deadly weapon…? I just love the smell of double standards in the morning.
"Your anger and your jealousy at her infidelity and your fear of losing her no doubt caused acute stress for you and led you to committing this offence. You are normally a quiet, non-violent, hard-working family man. This is a sad case and you acted completely out of character."
(For any moronic MRAs reading along, my argument is not that women should be excused for violent attacks on men, but that men shouldn't be excused for violent attacks on women. I'm not interested in a race to the bottom, but raising the bar on expectations for us all.)
[H/T to Shaker Rumble Lizard.]
Anti-Domestic Violence Fail
[Trigger warning.]
From the Rhode Island Coalition Against Domestic Violence comes this truly failful pair of posters intended to raise men's awareness about and discourage domestic violence.
Images are below: On the left, is an image of a punching bag wearing a green dress. On the right, is an image of a side of beef wearing a black top and jeans skirt. Below each image is the text: "It's not acceptable to treat a woman like one. Most men agree, but few speak out. Please, be heard. A man's voice is an effective way to change demeaning societal attitudes towards women."
[Click images to embiggen.]
Okay, so, the concept of encouraging men to be part of the solution is great (and an idea I heartily support). But the imagery here is deeply problematic.
One of the things any advocate for survivors of domestic and/or sexual violence knows is that putting a face on abuse is an important part of awareness-raising. Here, we get precisely the opposite—and the victims of domestic violence are not only faceless, but totally dehumanized, recast as, respectively, a punching bag in a dress and a piece of meat in a dress. Worse yet, they are disembodied, legless, limbless torsos, suggestive of violence against women. Good grief.
The images are then immediately followed by the confusing line: "It's not acceptable to treat a woman like one." I had the same reaction as Copyranter (who gets the hat tip): "What a clunky headline: 'It's not acceptable to treat a woman like one.' Like what? A woman?" Fail.
Maybe for their next campaign, the Rhode Island Coalition Against Domestic Violence should make sure there's at least one woman on the creative team.
Detainee Abuse: New Details Reported
[Strong trigger warning.]
My heart went into my throat as I read the headline in the Telegraph this morning: "Abu Ghraib abuse photos 'show rape': Photographs of alleged prisoner abuse which Barack Obama is attempting to censor include images of apparent rape and sexual abuse, it has emerged."
Oh god. Oh god.
The images, according to the story, show one male American soldier raping a female prisoner, a male American translator raping a male prisoner, someone else forcibly removing a female prisoner's clothes to expose her naked breasts, and other sexual assaults being committed on prisoners "with objects including a truncheon, wire, and a phosphorescent tube."
Oh god. Oh god.Detail of the content emerged from Major General Antonio Taguba, the former army officer who conducted an inquiry into the Abu Ghraib jail in Iraq [who supports Obama's decision to withhold the photos on the basis their release would "imperil our troops"].
How the descriptions will not, as President Obama asserted, "inflame anti-American public opinion and to put our troops in greater danger," but the photographs will is beyond me. I am sick to my stomach at the descriptions, totally repulsed, heart-achingly sad, utterly humiliated and regretful and ashamed that my country does such things.
…"The mere description of these pictures is horrendous enough, take my word for it."It was thought the images were similar to those leaked five years ago, which showed naked and bloody prisoners being intimidated by dogs, dragged around on a leash, piled into a human pyramid and hooded and attached to wires.
Sickened. I am sickened.
Mr Obama seemed to reinforce that view by adding: "I want to emphasise that these photos that were requested in this case are not particularly sensational, especially when compared to the painful images that we remember from Abu Ghraib."
When the original images were released, I was angry (and still am) that they were not rightly identified by most news outlets, no less our government, as evidence of widespread sexual assault. Now, here we have graphic evidence of penetrative rape, and our president says the images are "not particularly sensational," especially when compared to previously released images.
Unfortunately, I strongly suspect that is not indicative of our president and his advisors having recognized the nature of profound sexual exploitation in the original photos, but of what was a disgusting attempt to diminish the gravity of what is found in the unreleased photos, in order to justify their continued embargo.
When I finished reading the article, I could do nothing but quietly sob, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…" into my hands, apologizing to people who will never hear me, crushed with the unbearable pain of knowing precisely what they've suffered and that it was done in my name, ostensibly to protect me, when I would have risked dying at their hands myself to save them from being raped.
Rarely does the world feel more fucked up to me than it does right now.
Follow My Voice
Over the weekend Mlle Sparkletoes (my BFF and compagnon de chambre at Château Deeky) secreted me away to Chicago for 48 hours of hijinx and frivolity.
It was a heck of a nice surprise especially since I got to hang out with some of my favourite people in the multiverse, including Liss and Iain and the infamous Toddles. (Spudsy stood us up, which makes him an asshole, but wevs. He's yet to open my Xmas gift too (Hello, it's nearly June!), which makes him doubly an asshole.) The trip was extra, extra saucy special because OMFG!, I got to see Hedwig and the Angry Inch!! Live!!! On stage!!!!
Seriously, there aren't enough exclamation marks in the universe to express how brilliant the show was. And if there were, I'd need twice that many to say how brilliant Mlle Sparkletoes is for getting me there.
Anyway, I'm writing this not to tell you how awesome my weekend was (because when you're Deeky, every weekend is awesome) and how awesome, totally awesome, my friends are (all of which is absolutely true), but to let you know that the run of Hedwig at American Theater Company has been extended through June 13th. There is still time to see it.
Go, now, buy some tickets.
And because I love you all and want to show you my gratitude, I'll even get you a discount. Just, use the code "WOM" (that's shorthand for "word of mouth") when purchasing your tickets through the box office at (773) 409-4125 or online here and receive 10% off the ticket price.
The show really was amazing, well worth the 7 hour drive to get there, and any words to describe it just can't do it justice. Thanks Sparkletoes, thanks Liss, thanks Iain.
Question of the Day
What childhood toy, game, collectible, or fad did you totally not "get"? This can be a classic and timeless childhood pastime (like collecting baseball cards or hopscotch) or a flash-in-the-panner (like pet rocks or Furbies).
When I was a kid, everyone I knew was amassing Cabbage Patch Kids as though they were building a personal doll army and/or desperately wanted a Cabbage Patch Kid so badly they couldn't speak about anything else. I always thought they were dreadfully ugly and was horrified at the clips on the evening news of parents fighting over them in stores, which made me want no part of owning one.
I was, however, a great fan of Garbage Pail Kids.
Child Rape: Hilarious!
[Trigger warning].
At least, that's the message of most coverage of the Mary Kay LeTourneau-hosted "Hot for Teacher" night, which happened at a nightclub here in Seattle last week. (Letourneau was convicted in 1997 for raping her former student, Vili Fualaau, when he was 12 and she was 34. They were married in 2005 and have two daughters together).
"It sounds too crazy to be true--but it is!" Extra crowed, adding coyly, "minors were not allowed." TMZ called the event Letourneau's "Naughty teacher feature." People suggested Seattle-area readers attend the event, hosted by "that head of the class blast from the past." And FOX news noted that LeTourneau became "famous" in the 1990s for "having an affair with a sixth grader."
Um... the fuck? It's one thing to condone creepy schoolgirl fantasies (see: the poster for this very event, linked here, plus every fetish night in the world); it's quite another to hold a party for a convicted child rapist who began grooming her victim when he was in the second grade. Would a nightclub have hosted a similar party for this guy, who raped three boys, between 6 and 10? Or this guy, 25, who raped a 12-year-old girl? Or this guy, 24, who raped a 10-year-old girl? Or the first two guys in this post--self-defense instructors who raped their female teenage students?
Of course not. And we shouldn't give Letournau a pass just because she's a sweet-looking white lady and her now-husband says he gave his consent. Victimization is victimization, even when it comes in a female (and thus non-"threatening") package.
Also, as Sable Verity notes: A rapist can marry her victim, and gay couples are seen as the "threat" to marriage?
Daily Kitteh
Olivia watches telly while kneading the back of the sofa, then gives me a look for taking her picture before returning to her endless kneading. I'm pretty sure she's trying to turn the sofa into the biggest loaf evah of Pathetic Anger Bread.
Multiculturalism Is Hard on Conservative White Men
It makes them have to engage their precious brains for .03 milliseconds when pronouncing ethnic names of national figures—and soon all those .03 milliseconds will add up to one second, and that one second will add up to twelve seconds a year, and we can't be wasting precious white male brains for twelve seconds a year when they need to be focused on important things like discussing their favorite scene in Superbad.
Assvertising
A telephonic two-fer today…
First up: T-Mobile, who evidently believe they only have straight male customers who think with their dicks. In what way could this advert possibly appeal to a feminist woman? Oh, right—it can't. And since they don't want my business, I'm happy not to give it to them.
Voiceover: [with images of people talking on their cell phones] Eight out of ten Americans unknowingly pay too much for their cell phone service. So T-Mobile took action [image of five people in business suits walking down the street] sending out a team of economists to help people find the right plans for them. [images of doors being slammed on and families hiding from economists, then man spraying economist with garden hose] Then we tried a different approach.Next up: Boost Mobile, in a continuation of their "Unwronged" series, with quite the clusterfucktastrophe of a advert that uses some high-larious fat-hating in a misguided gender reversal that, as with most men-acting-like-ladeez turnabouts, merely manages to suggest that men who behave like women are ridiculous, and, oh, by the way, women are ridiculous, too. Although, in this advert, we get an extra dose of fuckery care of casting Danica Patrick in the role of Super Special Token Woman whose man-like qualities make her exceptional.
[image of man opening front door to reveal Catherine Zeta-Jones in low-cut hot pink dress]
CZJ: Do you have time for a mobile makeover?
Man: I believe I do.
Voiceover: Get your mobile makeover at independent site billshrink-dot-com and find the right plan for you.
CZJ: The coverage you need at the price you want: T-Mobile.
[close-up of cleavage with marked tan line; hand holding marker enters frame and signs autograph on breasts as camera pulls away, revealing it is Danica Patrick signing her name and the breasts belong to a man, who is, inexplicably, shoving his boobs together to create cleavage]Sigh.
Patrick: What? You think this is wrong? He's got a great rack! I'll tell you what's wrong—paying extra for the basic features on your phone, like texting. That's why I got Boost Mobile. Their fifty-dollar unlimited monthly plan lets me get the most out of my Motorola Clutch.
[fat young man comes up behind Patrick and squeezes his boobs together; she signs them, pats his shoulder, and walks away]
Voiceover: Fifty dollars unlimited nationwide. Talk, text, and web on the new Motorola Clutch. Boost Mobile: Unwronged.
[Assvertising: Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen, Twenty, Twenty-One, Twenty-Two, Twenty-Three, Twenty-Four, Twenty-Five, Twenty-Six, Twenty-Seven, Twenty-Eight, Twenty-Nine, Thirty, Thirty-One, Thirty-Two, Thirty-Three, Thirty-Four, Thirty-Five, Thirty-Six, Thirty-Seven, Thirty-Eight, Thirty-Nine, Forty, Forty-One, Forty-Two, Forty-Three, Forty-Four, Forty-Five, Forty-Six", Forty-Seven, Forty-Eight, Forty-Nine, Fifty, Fifty-One,Fifty-Two, Fifty-Three,Fifty-Four, Fifty-Five, Fifty-Six, Fifty-Seven, Fifty-Eight, Fifty-Nine, Sixty, Sixty-One, Sixty-Two, Sixty-Three, Sixty-Four, Sixty-Five, Sixty-Six.]
Random YouTubery: Quack Thinkin'!
Springtime in Spokane, Washington: It may be a time for rebirth, but Joel Armstrong noticed danger below his second-floor office window—a nest full of day-old hatchlings crawling around their mother on the ledge. When she flew down to the sidewalk, the ducklings, unable to fly, faced the possibility of a very hard landing. So Armstrong lent a hand, by catching some of the hatchlings as they jumped from the ledge [video of Armstrong catching ducklings]—one…two…three…four—and delivering them to their very anxious mother. Others he got with a ladder, and then off they went in search of water. Armstrong guided them right through the middle of a parade route. Before long, they got to their destination—the river—and Armstrong got himself a new nickname: The Duck Man. Mike Gracia, The Associated Press.[Via Chris.]
Wednesday Blogaround
This blogaround brought to you by Shaxco, wanton purveyors of empathy since 2004.
Recommended Reading:
Cara: Serial Rapist Convicted of Raping His Daughter (strong trigger warning)
Echidne: An Interesting Read
Pizza Diavola: "Gay!"
Andy: Adam Lambert Acknowledges Elephant in the Room, Says it's Pink
Tracey: Call Me a Humorless Feminist, But...
Tami: Why I'm finding It Hard to Stomach Post-Bush Bill Maher
Atrios: Conservatives Gone Wild (video)
Leave your links in comments...
