One-half of Hanna-Barbera, the animation team responsible for Yogi Bear, Tom & Jerry, The Flintstones, Scooby-Doo, Dastardly & Muttley, Space Ghost, The Jetsons, and many more childhood favorites has died. Mr. Barbera was 95.
My favorite HB cartoon, as I've mentioned before, was Jabberjaw. I loved this shit when I was a kid. I remember the first time I saw The Three Stooges, I thought they'd ripped off Jabberjaw, ha.
RIP Joseph Barbera
Oy
So, you're telling me that the daughter allegedly born to a woman who had sex in a car with Mel Gibson is named Carmel?
Come on. I discredit this story on the quality of that groaner alone.
But I love Pam's subject line…
From the Nothing's So Shite You Can't Laugh Files
Mr. Shakes: Fook fook fook fook fook! FOOK!
Shakes: This really is your fault, you know.
Mr. Shakes: Hoo's that?
Shakes: You jinxed yourself. Last night you were bragging about how you've not had a cigarette in almost four weeks*, how you've been stressed and upset and had to spend a week away from me [for a business trip], and none of it had driven you back to smoking. I believe your exact words were, "Noo matter what's happened, I haven't started back oon the fags." You tempted fate, and fate said, "Fuck you. Try this on for size."
Mr. Shakes: HA HA HA HA HA HA! Fook.
Shakes: Fook is right.
Mr. Shakes: Boot I haven't had a cigarette!
Shakes: Nor me. Yay us!
Mr. Shakes: Yay us!
--------------------
* Mr. Shakes and I quit smoking on Thanksgiving. Cold turkey, ho ho.
What does Mitt Romney think "discrimination" means?
Only in a media culture where claims must be presented without examination of their veracity, lest the presence of facts be considered a liberal bias, could we get this ridiculous headline: Romney against bias to gays despite opposition to gay marriage.
Gov. Mitt Romney said Monday he opposes discrimination against gays and lesbians despite his ongoing battles to outlaw same-sex marriage in Massachusetts, including a pending lawsuit.Sure, sure—no conflict at all. Except for the inconvenient little fact that "a belief that marriage is between a man an a woman," in spite of its positive-sounding spin, still doesn't really mean anything legally aside from denying rights to same-sex couples, i.e. discriminating against them. So, in fact, there is some conflict and Romney is in favor of at least one kind of discrimination.
…"I'm not in favor of discrimination of any kind including people who have a different sexual preference than myself," Romney said during the brief interview. "At the same time I'm very committed to traditional marriage between one man and one woman and believe that marriage should be preserved in that way."
…"I don't think there's any conflict between feeling that all people deserve respect and tolerance and that discrimination is wrong and a belief that marriage is between a man and a woman," Romney said Monday.
That makes Romney a dissembling twit and the headline a lie. Romney isn't "against bias to gays" despite his opposition to same-sex marriage; he makes inaccurate claims to be against bias disproven by his opposition to same-sex marriage.
Romney's playing an infuriating little game whereby opposition to same-sex marriage can't possibly be considered discriminatory because marriage isn't meant to be for anyone aside from one man and one woman in the first place so not extending it to gays isn't discriminatory, by gum, it's just the way it has to be by definition, that's all. (And hence granting it would be granting "special rights.") Such reasoning, of course, is manifest bullshit, the same kind of rubbish spewed by defenders of all manner of discrimination, right back to slavery, because freedom was only meant for certain people.
If Romney wants to stake out a position in opposition to same-sex marriage, that's his prerogative, and he can use any rationale he wants—it's against his religion, it betrays tradition, it's politically expedient, whatever. But he should at least be honest enough to admit what it is, which is discrimination, plain and simple. And if he can't speak the truth, then we must do it for him.
(PEEK-ed.)
Papa's Got a Brand New Bag
Hello, Shakers.
I'm sure you've seen Shakes' post below. I know you're all as grateful as I am that Mr. Shakes is doing fine.
I know this is an expensive time of year, and we're all strapped. But if you could find it possible to throw a little scratch their way to help them out in their time of need, it would be a wonderful War on Christmas gift for Shakes Manor.
If you scroll down on the right, there's a little Amazon tip jar where you can send a donation directly to them. I know Melissa would never ask for help on her own, so I'm stepping right over her to do it myself! I'm evil! Evil, I say!
Thanks for any help you can give, folks.
SHAKES: Just sneaking into Paul's post to say thank you, especially to those people who have already generously dropped something into the tip jar. I promise if there's any left over, I'll use it for a good cause...like sending 100 clowns to Paul's house in the dead of night to tickle his tender parts with balloon animals.
Bad Luck
Mr. Shakes was in a car accident this morning. Aside from a sore back, he's fine, thank the fates, but our only car isn't. He was cut off by someone who ran him up onto the curb and into a pole, a someone who just zoomed off, leaving us with the bill.
I've just passed a year of being unemployed since getting laid off, so we're totally broke and will have to submit the bill to our insurance. Of course, there's the deductible we'll need to pay first, god knows how, before they jack up our premiums.
The shittiest part of all this? We'd just received a notice that our premiums were about to go down because we hadn't been in an accident in years.
Actually, that's not even true. The shittiest part of all of this is that Mr. Shakes feels terrible about what happened, that he feels desperately guilty and there's nothing I can say or do to make him feel better at the moment. I can't console him, because his mind has seized on it being Christmastime, when being sad and struggling and worried seems ever so much worse.
And meanwhile some asshole who was in such a hurry, such a damn careless hurry, caused this accident and then couldn't even be bothered to stop, and he'll never give it a second thought. Happy Fucking Holidays.
Question of the Day
What would your teenaged self have thought of your current self? Would it have been proud, disgusted, amazed...?
The Me way back then, though similar in disposition, and with a familiar set of strengths and weaknesses, had very different ambitions and goals than the Me now. But I think he'd be reasonably happy with how things turned out. It's certainly been interesting: emigrating to another country (in order to get married, no less!), several career changes (more than I probably would have liked), new friendships formed and old -- hitherto unshakable -- ones fallen by the wayside, a reasonably untarnished conscience and some sense of self worth. Not too bad, for a decade. Interestingly, the areas in which he may have judged me poorly are no longer as important to me as they once were. Academic success eluded me, as did the stellar career I thought was my right, but these things no longer mean what they once did. My ambitions have taken on a more personal aspect, are narrower in focus and are concentrated upon those who are dear to me and the collection of hobbies and interests that have grown in significance as the years have passed. As I age, the pressures of conformity fade away, and my ambitions are more my own (a modicum of self preservation, aside).
So all in all, I think the teenaged Me would be content. The young whippersnapper might even learn a thing or two.
Shakes says: "The teenaged Me would probably think I'm pretty cool. She'd love the blog, love Mr. Shakes, be completely unsurprised Mr. Furious and I are still friends, and think it's totally awesome! that I'm still obsessed with Mozza. She'd find my friends fascinating, be thrilled with the traveling and study and work I've done, and be relieved I haven't had kids. She'd probably also wonder why the hell I was living in Indiana (a question the current Me asks with regularity, too). Also, she'd be like, 'Nice arse, fatty,' and I'd be like, 'I know, right?' And I think she'd be both relieved and impressed that the current Me is happy in life and with herself."
Feministing
Jessica (with her original emphasis):
I can't tell you how many times after telling a guy I'm a feminist, he'll jokingly throw his hands up in defense as if I'm gearing up to attack him. Now of course, this is tremendously stupid and annoying on a number of levels: first, it plays on the idea that feminists are scary and man-hating, but more importantly it’s meant to be mocking. (Haha, don’t hit me, little cute feminist girl!) I even had someone, after telling him that I run a feminist blog, lift up my arm and peer into my armpit jokingly—looking for hair. Yeah, hysterical.Feminists Can't Win 101: When identifying oneself as a feminist to a non-feminist, the non-feminist is likely to make a gesture or comment that is trite and uninspired. When the feminist reacts to the "joke" with the resounding dearth of laughter it deserves, the non-feminist's presumption that feminists are humorless is thusly reinforced.
If your comedy instincts include whipping out a comment about granola or leghair upon hearing the word "feminism," feminists' sense of humor isn't really the problem, k?
What’s truly kills me about the “oh so scary feminist” stereotype is that it’s generally a big joke to the people who perpetuate it. The implication is that while we’re unattractive and annoying (bitches and ballbusters, all of us), we’re not really a threat at all—just bothersome. It’s a sweet little way to make feminism seem uncool and unimportant all the same time.Very true. Or so I've heard, anyway; being perceived as nasty and/or scary has never been a particular concern of mine, ahem.
I think what's most important to remember about this stereotype—and most hackneyed bullshit involving feminism, really—is that is serves a specific, strategic purpose. Not many people want to be considered nasty and scary—especially young women.
In all seriousness, the fear of—or, perhaps more accurately, the frustration with—being seen as irrational (unintelligent) and hypersensitive (uncool) are as equally important factors for feminist women, which is why I firmly believe that every women's studies program at every university should include an introductory course called You're Dumb, Oversensitive, and Ugly, the objective of which is to explore the practical realities of being an active feminist in the world. I've seen women with a belly full of fire and a head full of steam about overt sexism at work absolutely crumple like a flan in a cupboard with one comment about how they are humorless, over-reactionary, dowdy, fat, or, simply, not fun. It's a shock to the system to collide head-on with such an entirely inappropriate comment about one's appearance or personality, to have a meritorious argument dismissed with schoolyard mockery dressed up as adult discourse. It can be highly embarrassing, too, particularly if it happens in front of other people, and all the theory in the world can't protect against that sort of paralyzing surprise. Feminists for whom the thick skin is not innate could probably benefit from a little assistance in the form of being taught what to expect. (Especially since any veteran feminist could teach the damn course; we've all experienced the same tired shit. Nothing ever seems to be new in anti-feminism…)
That shouldn't be misconstrued as an exhortation to develop a resistance to listening, learning, or legitimate criticism, but merely to find a way to avoid internalizing predictable unfair attacks—some of which will come disguised as accusations of not listening, not learning, or refusing to acknowledge as legitimate criticism some rubbish like "I don't object to what you're saying; I object to how you're saying it" (the utterers of which are, to the contrary, almost invariably masking theoretical, not semantic, objections) or "Feminism is exclusionary" (a complaint, you'll note, strangely never made by men who have included themselves). Standing one's ground in the face of repeated accusations of being unreasonably strident and unyielding is tough when the indictment has a facade vaguely resembling fairness. It's imperative that young feminists find a way to see through and deal with the bullshit that inevitably surrounds this deeply personal issue; otherwise life will seem a whole lot longer than one might like.
And then the trick is to find, as much as anyone is able, a balance between using humor whenever possible, and kicking it into hardcore high gear when necessary, without apology. Being a successful feminist in a world so largely resistant to your ideals takes, rather unfairly I'm afraid, a certain panache and charisma dependent on not caring whether anyone thinks you have panache or charisma.
That's a real kick in the pants, as they say, but The Patriarchy never told us life was fair. Quite the opposite, actually. It's no wonder we feel grumpy sometimes; there's no need to exacerbate it by feeling guilty about that, too. Tears in a bucket; motherfuckit, bitchez. When we laugh, we laugh—and when we don't, well, maybe it's because there just ain't shit to laugh about that day. I'm all right with that.
Filthy Rainbow-Stealing Gays
The newest front in the epic battle of Good vs. Evil? Rainbows.
THE RAINBOW HAS BECOME an iconic image for gay rights, representing diversity and unity. But owners of a web-based Christian business believe what they say is its true meaning of holiness has been lost to homosexuals promoting "perversion" and are now [hawking] their own rainbow wares as a way to reclaim the rainbow as a solely conservative Christian symbol.Business is, of course, the operative word here. As I've vociferously complained previously, hate-mongering against the LGBT community sponsored by Gun-Toting Jesus Brand Religious
And so Take Back Our Rainbow, Inc. has set up shop in the bustling marketplace already built and servicing a primed, cash-in-hand market who are always looking for new ways to spend their money to prove their piety.
Take Back Our Rainbow Inc. sells car magnets, bookmarks and bracelets emblazoned with the "Take Back Our Rainbow" logo. The group claims gay organizations have stolen the rainbow and are "using a holy symbol to promote that (gay) lifestyle."So much execrable nonsense, just like any one of hundreds of similar faith-based business endeavors. The rainbow is a naturally-occurring phenomenon, not a built symbol like the cross or the fish. Even if one believes every rainbow is hand-crafted by the Almighty, he puts them over San Francisco, too.
"We are a company that believes it is time to take a stand for our beliefs and we are asking all Christians to do the same," the business’s website reads. "Let’s all stand up and take our rainbow back. Those who choose to pervert this holy symbol may have well taken the cross or the Christian Fish (symbol). They may soon do this because we are doing nothing to stop the use of our symbols for perversion."
And, by the by, in all my very gay-filled days, I've never been under the impression that the LGBT community had appropriated the rainbow to "promote that lifestyle," but to illustrate quite cleverly the spectrum of human experience of which they are an unfairly marginalized part. I always felt like I am part of that rainbow, too, as is anyone who celebrates difference, rather than exploiting it for tiresome, loathsome hate-mongering.
Colorado: Hotbed of Gay Evangelical Sex
Part Three in an ongoing series…
As part of "an examination of the staff's moral makeup" at New Life Church in Colorado Springs after Ted Haggard's meth-fueled big gay fall from grace, an executive staff member has also resigned for sexual misconduct and "other mistakes."
Christopher BeardHis name is Beard. BEARD! You can't make this shit up, people.
who headed a ministry that trained young adults in leadership skills, stepped down Friday after admitting to "a series of decisions displaying poor judgment, including one incident of sexual misconduct several years ago," said Rob Brendle, an associate pastor at the 14,000- member church.What a relief! And a refreshing change of pace.
Citing confidentiality over personnel issues, Brendle would not discuss the nature of the sexual misconduct except to say it did not involve Haggard or a minor.
Beard, a New Life employee for nine years, was not married at the time of the incident but is now, Brendle said.To Mrs. Beard. Oh lawdy, save me!
Beard's "voluntary" resignation has been classified by (remaining) church leaders as "another step toward making sure the 'disordered moral life' demonstrated in Haggard's fall is 'excised from the church'," and they would also like to remind you that being gay is the ultimate hallmark of a disordered moral life—and the only thing that can get your ass fired, even if you are obviously Teh Crazy.
In 2002, Beard was reprimanded by church officials after he staged a missionary training drill using fake assault weapons. A SWAT team was put on alert after a passing motorist thought the guns were real.Uh huh. That's one way to train "young adults in leadership skills." My question is whether he was reprimanded for using fake assault weapons in missionary training, or for getting busted after carelessly running the Onward Christian Soldiers workshop too close to the highway?
I wonder if the New Life Church is bleeding parishioners after all this bad publicity, or if there's enough forgiveness to go around for all the gay married church leaders rent boys have shaken a stick at. If they start hurting for cash, they ought to consider a corporate sponsorship from Planters—because that joint is chock full of nuts.
(Via.)
Schooled
If there's one thing Wingnuts love to holler, it's how biased the MSM is regarding Iraq. They never talk about the "good" things in Iraq, they grumble. What about the schools? There are so many schools open and running, and the "liberal media" never mentions it!
Well, they might just want to drop that talking point.
BAGHDAD — Iraq's schools, long touted by American officials as a success story in a land short on successes, increasingly are being caught in the crossfire of the country's escalating civil war.And what happens when you have a country filling with uneducated, terrified young people, who see no future prospects for themselves?
President Bush has routinely talked about the refurbishment and construction of schools as a neglected story of progress in Iraq. The U.S. Agency for International Development has spent about $100 million on Iraq's education system and cites the rehabilitation of 2,962 school buildings as a signal accomplishment.
But today, across the country, campuses are being shuttered, students and teachers driven from their classrooms and parents left to worry that a generation of traumatized children will go without education.
Teachers tell of students kidnapped on their way to school, mortar rounds landing on or near campuses and educators shot in front of children.
This month insurgents distributed pamphlets at campuses, some sealed inside an envelope with an AK-47 bullet.
"To the Honest People of Baghdad," one pamphlet read, "we want you to leave the schools, hospitals, institutes, colleges and universities until the illegal government of [Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri] Maliki is put down. We want your full cooperation on this."
No credible current national school attendance statistics exist in Iraq, whose education system was once considered a model in the Arab world. But examples abound of schools being closed or left mostly empty as parents flee the country or keep their children home.
But the scale of the violence is such that public places — squares, gas station lines, open-air markets and schools — have become killing zonesWhat happens when they are taught, from the earliest ages imaginable, that America is responsible for this?
Education Ministry officials have done little to secure Baghdad's schools. Officials said that school guards are not allowed to carry arms, and in at least one case, a guard was slain by gunmen.
At one elementary school in Mansour, a neighborhood of large homes once known for good schools and relatively little violence, the principal scoffed at an unarmed guard the ministry had dispatched after the campus was threatened.
"What is he going to do? We even started to make jokes about him," said the principal, who spoke on condition her name not be used. "When a gang of armed men come, he will start screaming: 'Here's the principal! Kill her!' "
The principal, a woman in her early 30s, said she had started bringing a revolver to work. "I cannot risk being kidnapped," she said apologetically.
When the school year began this fall, six students showed up, she said. But attendance gradually picked up. Then the principal received a series of anonymous threats on her cellphone.
"A man said we should close the school, otherwise they will come and bring the school down on our heads," she said.
What happens when they grow up and they're able to use weapons?
The White House Whitewashing begins...
When your legacy is in danger, and you don't want to look like a complete incompetent doofus in the eyes of history, what can you do?
Other than try to improve yourself and set things right, that is.
Why, whitewash history, of course.
The New York Daily News reported last month that President Bush and “his truest believers” are launching “their final campaign — an eye-popping, half-billion-dollar drive for the Bush presidential library.”I love that phrase. "Legacy polishing." In other words, more lies, lies, and damned lies.
Bush is attempting to raise $500 million to build a library and think tank at Southern Methodist University in Dallas, the alma mater of First Lady Laura Bush. “The more [money] you have, the more influence [on history] you can exert,” one adviser said. Much of the money will be used to build a “legacy-polishing” institute:
The legacy-polishing centerpiece is an institute, which several Bush insiders called the Institute for Democracy. Patterned after Stanford University’s Hoover Institution, Bush’s institute will hire conservative scholars and “give them money to write papers and books favorable to the President’s policies,” one Bush insider said.Paying off writers for positive spin... the hallmark of the Bush "legacy."
Now, one would think that being this is Southern Methodist University in Dallas, and that the Bushes have ties there, this would happen without question, right?
Well, shuck my corn. Looks like everyone isn't ready to roll over and allow bullshit to pile up unchecked:
Now, SMU faculty, administrators, and staff are speaking out. In a December 16 letter to R. Gerald Turner, president of the Board of Trustees, members of SMU’s Perkins School of Theology have urged the board to “reconsider and to rescind SMU’s pursuit of the presidential library.”Well, I'd better figure out how to send a standing ovation in an envelope, because The Perkins School of Theology just earned a big one from me.We count ourselves among those who would regret to see SMU enshrine attitudes and actions widely deemed as ethically egregious: degradation of habeas corpus, outright denial of global warming, flagrant disregard for international treaties, alienation of long-term U.S. allies, environmental predation, shameful disrespect for gay persons and their rights, a pre-emptive war based on false and misleading premises, and a host of other erosions of respect for the global human community and for this good Earth on which our flourishing depends.
Frankly, I think this idea should have rolled over and died itself the instant the lie factory was entitled "The Institute for Democracy."
(Image via Father Dan.)
Female Geckos: Men—can't live with 'em. Uh, that's all.
All creatures great and small
Gecko sits and watches all
From perches short and tall
— The Creatures, "Gecko"
Sister geckos doing it for themselves:
The survival of at least one species does not depend on men.The all-female populations do "a better job of colonising areas," and even though they lack "a bit of the genetic variation" of breeding with males, the daughters are not exact clones. I'm not sure what these sassy bitchez are supposed to be mourning, exactly.
The female mourning gecko has found a way to simulate sex and produce eggs, rendering her male counterpart redundant, scientists have found.
…"They have an unusual reproductive strategy which allows populations to consist only of females," NT Environment Minister Marion Scrymgour said today.
"Males are not necessary to fertilise and initiate egg production (which) permits the mourning gecko to be a very successful invasive species."
Aww, just kidding, fellas!
In an amusing twist of coincidence, the Australian city being most affected by "the invading female hordes" is Darwin.
(Via.)
"You belong in hell."
The New York Times finally picks up the story of an outrageous proselytizing high school teacher a month after it was first in the news. Honestly. There's a reason I consider my Bloglines the best morning paper ever.
Kona's got more.
"Even Saddam Hussein had more legal counsel than I ever had."
This story in the New York Times—about a Navy veteran went to Iraq as a security contractor, became a whistle-blower about possible illegal weapons trading at the firm for which he was working, and ended up being erroneously detained for 97 days at the military’s maximum-security detention facility in Baghdad, after "American soldiers raided the company at his urging"—is so deeply disturbing, I don't even know where to begin. Really, I recommend just reading the whole thing. I cannot believe that this kind of thing is being done to American citizens by their own government, and I really have to agree with Mr. Vance's lawyer when he says, "Treating an American citizen in this fashion would have been unimaginable before 9/11."
Except, of course, 9/11 itself didn't "change everything," did it? Our leaders "changed everything," and used 9/11 as the excuse.
Congratulations…
…to all the 2006 Weblog Award winners! Special congrats to:
Best Blog: Daily Kos (for kicking LGF's ass)
Best Humor Blog: Sadly, No!
Best Liberal Blog: Think Progress (who kicked our ass, but whom we dearly love)
Best Centrist Blog: The Moderate Voice
Best Media Blog: The Raw Story
Best LGBT Blog: Pam's House Blend
Best Educational Blog: Michael Bérubé
Best Science Blog: Pharyngula
Best Gossip Blog: D-Listed
Best Video Blog: Crooks & Liars
Best of the Top 3501 - 5000 Blogs: Blue Gal
Honorable mentions to all the other bloggers we love who put in excellent showings—Konagod, Tom Watson, Deborah Lipp, Feministe, Orcinus, Jon Swift, Geeky Mom, Phantom Scribbler, and whomever else I'm forgetting (as usual)!
And thanks to everyone who voted for Shakes!
Seriously, Just Shut Up
In case you needed a reminder that Bush thinks you're an incredibly dense, blockheaded moron:
WASHINGTON -Gee, thanks Prezint Signingstatement McNoVeto! We certainly wouldn't want anything pushed on the American people without debate, would we?
President Bush said Saturday that his administration will outline a series of changes that would clamp down on the common Capitol Hill practice of slipping pet projects into spending bills.
These projects, called earmarks, are spending provisions that often are put into bills at the last minute, so they never get debated or discussed, Bush said in his weekly radio address.
"It is not surprising that this often leads to unnecessary federal spending, such as a swimming pool or a teapot museum tucked into a big spending bill," he said.
And I've got your unnecessary federal spending right here, asshole.
He really does think that no one pays the slightest attention to anything, doesn't he?
UPDATE: 31, 709 earmarks later...
You can move out of the country…
…but you'll still get screwed by Bush!
[W]ith new tax pressures facing American expatriates due to legislation enacted in Washington this year, some international tax lawyers say they detect rising demand from citizens to renounce ties with the United States — the only developed country that taxes its citizens while they are overseas. Americans abroad are also taxed in foreign countries where they reside.If an ex-pat renounces her/his passport for tax reasons, s/he is prohibited by law from ever entering the US again (although that law isn't typically enforced). If s/he renounces because s/he thinks the president is a stinking jackass, however, s/he's still allowed to visit. As it happens, none too few renunciants are citing "political reasons and their displeasure with the Bush administration" these days, too. Gee, I can't imagine why.
…Concern about taxes among expatriates has surged since President George W. Bush signed into law a bill that sharply increases tax rates for Americans abroad with income of more than $82,400 a year. The legislation also increases taxes on employer-provided benefits like housing allowances.
…The legal ritual of renunciation is largely unique to the United States because other countries base taxation on residency, not citizenship.
I love how President Taxcutz is actually raising taxes on Americans living abroad. I'm sure that decision has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that most Americans living abroad are liberals whose votes can't be lost by increased taxation—and whose votes, if lost permanently via renunciation of citizenship, wouldn't matter a smidgeon to the GOP.
Thanks for the heads-up to my girlfriend Miller, who is "so outta here, dude."
