Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label girls. Show all posts

Happy International Women's Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Friday, March 08, 2019
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Today is International Women's Day, which is generally only meaningfully marked by the people who already treat every day as International Women's Day. It is a day on which I am usually pointedly reminded that the business of advocating on behalf of women's equality is still considered woman's work, which tends to give the day a flavor of bitter irony that doesn't want to leave my mouth.

Nonetheless, every year, I feel obliged to try to write something profound for International Women's Day, and every year I fail, and most years I feel more optimistic about the state of women's equality than I do on this day.

I'm angry about the state of the world for the women in it, for women in my own country and for women in every country all over the world, Black women, brown women, white women, tall women, short women, women with dwarfism, fat women, thin women, in-betweenie women, trans women, intersex women, disabled women, able-bodied women, neuro-typical women, neuro-atypical women, old women, young women, girls, women with children, childfree women, healthy women, ill women, poor women, rich women, middle class women, employed women, unemployed women, women who do unpaid labor, insured women, uninsured women, immigrant women, migrant women, refugee women, English-speaking women, non-English-speaking women, progressive women, conservative women, women in unions, women in uniforms, women in male-centric careers, women in comas, straight women, lesbian women, bisexual women, asexual women, demisexual women, partnered women, unpartnered women, polyam women, aromantic women, powerful women, weak women, vegan woman, vegetarian women, omnivorous women, religious women, atheist women, agnostic women, educated women, uneducated women, women who have survived trauma, women who want my advocacy, women who don't, and/or every other conceivable expression, intersection, and experience of womanhood that exists on the planet.

I am angry at what we are denied on the basis of our womanhood, or the insufficiency of our womanhood, or the unacceptable expression of our womanhood, as arbitrarily defined by people fiercely guarding their privilege.

I am angry that we are denied autonomy, dignity, respect, the right of consent, safety, security, opportunity, access, equality—and many things smaller than those.

That anger threatens every day to engulf me, to hold me like a flame under a jar until, starved of oxygen, I disappear into a wisp of smoke. I search each morning for a way to turn that anger into inspiration, fuel, purpose. Today is a day like all others in that regard.

Today is a day when I am angry, but, also like all other days, it is a day on which I am happy to be a woman among women.

I do not long to be the Exceptional Woman. When I find myself in a space in which I am the only woman, I do not feel satisfied, nor do I feel insecure: I feel contemptuous that there aren't more women there. I do not want to compete with other women in a way that suggests there is only room for one of us. I want to lift up other women, and be lifted up by them, and blaze trails in the hopes that many more will follow behind.

I respect women, and I love them. And when I take stock of all the issues disproportionately affecting women across the globe, what I see is lack of respect and love for women so pervasive and profound that to merely assert to love and respect women yet remains a radical act.

It is at the intersection of my anger at the mistreatment of women and my love and respect for them that I find my motivation every day.


This year's International Women's Day campaign theme is #BalanceforBetter: "The future is exciting. Let's build a gender-balanced world. Everyone has a part to play — all the time, everywhere. From grassroots activism to worldwide action, we are entering an exciting period of history where the world expects balance. We notice its absence and celebrate its presence. Balance drives a better working world. Let's all help create a #BalanceforBetter."

Okay! I'm in! I am committed to women's equality on this day, and every day.


All I ever do is try to empty the sea with this teaspoon; all I can do is keep trying to empty the sea with this teaspoon.

Like I say every year: I am an imperfect advocate for women, and I have nothing profound to say on International Women's Day. Again. The truth is, I just want to recommit myself to treating every day as a day in which it is important to fight for international justice for women, and to value and respect them, including myself.

I am a feminist with a teaspoon, and I ain't afraid to use it.

* * *

One of the ways I'm using my teaspoon today is to recommend women to follow, listen to, amplify, and support on Twitter:


[Note: In one of my tweets, I carelessly included @amaditalks, who is non-binary. My apologies to Mx. Amadi.]

Please feel welcome and very encouraged to head to comments to recommend women to follow on Twitter and/or wherever their work can be found!

Open Wide...
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A Letter from the Woman Who Should Be President

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Monday, December 17, 2018
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Eight-year-old Martha Kennedy Morales of College Park, Maryland, ran for class president and lost to a male classmate. Word of her loss reached Hillary Clinton, who decided to write her a letter.

Valerie Strauss at the Washington Post reports:

Martha said that as part of a unit on U.S. government, elections for class president and Congress were held, and she decided to run for the top job. Her opponent, she said, was a popular fourth-grade boy.

...Her father, Albert Morales, said Martha waged a serious campaign to win, and he routinely posted campaign updates on his Facebook page. He revealed the results of the contest there, too.

Democratic political activist Bryan Weaver said a number of Albert Morales's friends saw his Facebook posts, got caught up in the election, and were upset when Martha lost. "A friend of mine who runs a bar on U Street welled up with tears," he said.

...Someone who knows Clinton saw the posts and mentioned it to her, and she decided to write to the youngster. Her spokesman, Nick Merrill, confirmed that the letter is authentic.

"My mom was just picking me up from school, and she pulled the letter out of her purse," Martha said. "I opened it up, and it was a letter from Hillary Clinton. I was very surprised."

...The 8-year-old, who is looking forward to turning 9 next week, is now working on a thank-you note.
Martha's parents made public a photo of the letter from Hillary Clinton to their daughter, who was declared vice president of the class after her loss.

image of the letter to Martha from Hillary Clinton
The letter reads:

HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON

December 6, 2018

Martha Kennedy Morales
[redacted address]

Dear Martha:

I learned from your father, Albert's post on Facebook about your election experience running for Class President at [redacted]. Congratulations on being elected Vice President!

While I know you may have been disappointed that you did not win President, I am so proud of you for deciding to run in the first place. As I know too well, it’s not easy when you stand up and put yourself in contention for a role that’s only been sought by boys. The most important thing is that you fought for what you believed in, and that is always worth it. As you continue to learn and grow in the years ahead, never stop standing up for what is right and seeking opportunities to be a leader, and know that I am cheering you on for a future of great success.

With best wishes and warm regards, I am

Sincerely yours,

[signature]
Hillary Rodham Clinton
Congratulations to vice-president Martha Kennedy Morales. ♥

Open Wide...
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Happy Day of the Girl

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, October 11, 2018
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To all the girls, everywhere:

I dream of futures formidable and vast.

I dream of them when I am sleeping, and when I am wide awake. Behind each blink of my eyes is an audacious vision, urging me.

My dreams are vivid with abstract images of times and spaces where equality is not a promise but a fact.

In my dreams, we look each other in the eyes and hold each other's gazes without swallowing down fear. We want to know one another and want to be known. Because it is safe.

It turns out there is enough humanity for us all. Plenty to go around.

In my dreams, I do not fly. I float. I float in a cool sea of collective fulfillment. Here, cradled in the embrace of these sparkling, reverberant waves, I realize this true thing: Contentment is better than joy.

In my dreams, the world is full of girls who are more than the incandescently happy we're meant to regard as a finite goal. In my dreams, they are safe. In my dreams, they are valued. Because being safe and valued makes unhappiness survivable and real happiness possible. Because both are parts of the complex humanity denied by defining a rigidly policed happiness the exclusive objective.

In my dreams, the haunting feeling doesn't exist — I don't feel like I will never be enough of any of the things I am expected to be.

In my dreams, there are no more terrible bargains. Even in my dreams, I expect more. Because I don't know how to expect anything else.

In my dreams, every day is a day of and for every girl.

Open Wide...
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Today in the Continued Absurdity of Being a Woman in a Misogynist Culture

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Wednesday, May 23, 2018
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I am very excited about the upcoming major motion picture Oceans 8, starring fully one zillion amazing women. It's about thieves who commit an elaborate heist.

That's not a spoiler — that's the premise of all the Oceans movies: The original 1960's Rat Pack Ocean's 11; the 2001 Clooney Pack remake Ocean's 11; its two sequels, Ocean's Twelve and Ocean's Thirteen; and now the all-lady version, Ocean's 8.

They're stylish crime capers! That's the whole point.

But Frank Sinatra and George Clooney were probably never asked if they weren't encouraging young boys to go into a life of crime, like the cast of Ocean's 8 were. Yes, really.

Midway through Ocean's 8, there's a scene where Sandra Bullock's exquisitely coated Debbie Ocean faces a mirror and reminds herself why she's decided to rob the Met Gala: not for man, not for herself, she says, but for the 8-year-old girl out there who could be inspired to lead a life of crime. At an extravagant press conference for Ocean's 8 held next to the Temple of Dendur at the Metropolitan Museum of Art today, one reporter asked the cast if they really were trying inspire 8-year-old girls with their work. What effect would these "strong female roles" have? "Encouraging children to crime," Cate Blanchett deadpanned.
ILY, Cate Blanchett.

The line in the film is a send-up of the very dynamic that apparently played out at this promotional event: The expectation that women must always be centrally occupied with representing womanhood, especially with regard to the example we're setting for girls.

What about the children? is something privileged men get to demand of us (and of marginalized men), but never have demanded of them, no matter how depraved their behavior or the policies they support. (*cough* gun proliferation *cough*)

Visible women must never be allowed to be imperfect, and imperfect women must never be allowed to be role models.

Rinse and repeat forever.

In any case, it isn't only Cate Blanchett who's smarter than this shit.
Mindy Kaling then took the conversation in another direction, pointing out that the film provides positive representation of another, noncriminal sort in the fact that the characters are "orchestrating a crime, rather than fighting over a man." Sandra Bullock pointed out that there is a man the characters in Ocean's 8 fixate on, but more because he's a target, not a love interest. The film aces the Bechdel test and probably earns a heap of extra credit on the assignment. "Our conversations are not about that man, and I think that's very exciting," Kaling said.

..."To an 8-year-old girl, maybe we're not trying to say, 'Go have a life of crime,'" Anne Hathaway added, "but we're saying, 'Go do what you want; there's space for you.'"
And in that space will be someone asking stupid questions. But keep doing what you want, anyway, girls.

Never let stupid questions make you question yourself. Take that piece of unsolicited advice from your Auntie Liss straight to the bank.

Or, you know, to your thieves' den, if that's your jam. You do you.

Open Wide...
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We Resist: Day 482

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Wednesday, May 16, 2018
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a black bar with the word RESIST in white text

One of the difficulties in resisting the Trump administration, the Republican Congressional majority, and Republican state legislatures (plus the occasional non-Republican who obliges us to resist their nonsense, too, like we don't have enough to worry about) is keeping on top of the sheer number of horrors, indignities, and normalization of the aggressively abnormal that they unleash every single day.

So here is a daily thread for all of us to share all the things that are going on, thus crowdsourcing a daily compendium of the onslaught of conservative erosion of our rights and our very democracy.

Stay engaged. Stay vigilant. Resist.

* * *

Earlier today by me: Who Could've Guessed Kim Jong Un Would Be Erratic and Unreliable? and Don Jr: The Liar Doesn't Fall Far from the Tree and On Mike Pence's Destructive Ambition.

Here are some more things in the news today...

Lachlan Markay at the Daily Beast: Trump Formally Admits He Reimbursed Michael Cohen.
Donald Trump has officially acknowledged that he reimbursed his attorney, Michael Cohen, for a payment the lawyer made on Trump's behalf in 2017. The purpose of the payment is not named, but it was almost surely the one Cohen made to a porn actress with whom Trump allegedly had an affair.

"In the interest of transparency," reads a footnote in Trump's newly filed 2017 financial disclosure form, "while not required to be disclosed as 'reportable liabilities' on Part 8, in 2016 expenses were incurred by one of Donald J. Trump's attorneys, Michael Cohen. Mr. Cohen sought reimbursement of those expenses and Mr. Trump fully reimbursed Mr. Cohen in 2017. The category of value would be $100,001 - $250,000 and the interest rate would be zero."

That line almost certainly refers to the $130,000 payment that Cohen made to Stormy Daniels in October 2016 in exchange for her signing a non-disclosure agreement regarding her alleged tryst with Trump.
"Expenses were incurred." Oh, they were, huh? LOL this fucking criminal clown.


And there's the rub.

FINGERS CROSSED THAT THIS WILL MATTER AT SOME POINT BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE GREAT.


* * *

Adrienne Mahsa Varkiani at ThinkProgress: Nikki Haley Walks out of U.N. Security Council Meeting as Palestinian Envoy Begins to Speak. "The Security Council was holding an emergency meeting to discuss the violence in Gaza. Israeli forces killed at least 62 Palestinians protesting along the border fence on Monday, according to the Palestinian Health Ministry in Gaza. That number included several children, one of whom was just 8 months old. More than 3,100 others were wounded. ...'I ask my colleagues here in the Security Council: Who among us would accept this type of activity on your border?' she said. 'No one would. No country in this chamber would act with more restraint than Israel has.' Haley did not mention the Israeli soldiers and snipers firing at the Palestinian protesters or the death toll from Monday. Less than two hours later, when Permanent Observer of Palestine to the United Nations Riyad Mansour began to speak, she walked out of the meeting." Wow. What a disgrace.


Michael Birnbaum at the Washington Post: E.U. Leader Lights into Trump: 'With Friends Like That, Who Needs Enemies?'
Even by the stressed standards of relations between Europe and the United States in the Trump era, European Council President Donald Tusk's Wednesday criticisms were unusually cutting.

At the outset of a summit of European leaders whose agenda items, point by point, have to do with the flames of crises that many Europeans see as ignited by [Donald] Trump, Tusk ripped into what he called "the capricious assertiveness of the American administration" over issues including Iran, Gaza, trade tariffs, and North Korea.

...Tusk, a former prime minister of Poland who now presides over one branch of E.U. policymaking, went full zen in his angry description of Trump's effect on Europe.

"Looking at the latest decisions of Donald Trump, someone could even think: With friends like that, who needs enemies?" Tusk told reporters in English ahead of a summit in Sofia, Bulgaria. "But, frankly speaking, Europe should be grateful by [Donald] Trump. Because, thanks to him, we got rid of all the illusions. He has made us realize that if you need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of your arm."
Just as a totally random (cough) reminder: President Obama hired Hillary Clinton as his Secretary of State because her reputation with leaders around the world was so stellar.

Sob.

* * *


The Democrats really failed on that one, in my estimation, but it's important to remember that, by and large, they are still fighting the good fight day in and day out, despite many forces working against them.

To wit: Eric Levitz at NYMag: The Democratic Party Has an 'MSNBC Problem'.
"The Democrats need to stop obsessing about Trump and Russia, and start talking about the bread-and-butter issues that matter to ordinary people." Since Donald Trump took office, that sentiment has been a refrain for the party's leading critics on both the left and right. It is also fundamentally unfair.

In truth, the Democratic Party is quite focused on promoting a progressive critique of the GOP's positions on taxes, health care, and social spending, because it knows that Republicans are deeply vulnerable on those issues. MSNBC, CNN, and the broader mainstream media, however, are obsessed with the White House's myriad scandals — because they know that a federal investigation into the American president's potential ties to the Kremlin (and/or porn stars and/or white-collar crime) is ratings gold — while daily broadcasts reiterating the regressive implications of the GOP's tax law and health-care plans would be anything but.

If you get your news from Democratic Twitter accounts, then you might well think that the biggest "scandal" in American politics right now is the Republican Party's war on the middle class.

But if you get your news from cable television — or secondhand from friends and family who watch cable news — then you will think that "Russia-gate" is the Democratic Party's central concern; because that is just about the only thing that cable news channels invite Democratic officeholders to go on television to discuss.

...It is not MSNBC's job to promote the Democratic Party's economic message. And the Mueller investigation is an important and fascinating story that's tailor-made for television news. It would not be realistic for Democrats to expect any for-profit media company to prioritize conveying its preferred political narratives over covering the most sensational events of the day.

And yet, Republicans do get that courtesy from the nation's most-watched cable news channel. Fox News puts the GOP's messaging needs ahead of maximizing eyeballs: When big breaking news about the Mueller investigation reflects poorly on the Republican president, Fox lets its competitors own the day's top story.

This puts Democrats at a profound structural disadvantage — especially in the war for the hearts and minds of working-class white voters in the deindustrializing Midwest.
There is much more at the link, and I highly recommended reading the whole thing.

Democrats are also at a disadvantage because the political press largely doesn't explain that foreign collusion is itself a "bread-and-butter issue." You know who cares even less about providing livable wages for working class Americans than the Republican Party? Vladimir Putin.

* * *

[Content Note: Anti-Blackness; misogynoir; harassment] Blue Telusma at the Grio: 'Humiliated' Black Woman Strip-Searched by Macy's Clerk Because 'People Like You Have Been Stealing'. "Conteh Moore was shopping at a San Jose Macy's on May 8th when a sales associate accused her of stealing a bottle of cologne. Shortly thereafter, the employee performed an invasive strip search on her without her consent, but came up empty handed. 'They searched my purse and stripped my sweater off me,' Moore said. She also claims the employee made comments that demonstrated her suspicions about Moore being a thief were based on racial bias. 'She said, 'People like you have been stealing from Macy's, stealing stuff,'' Moore explained." JFC.

[CN: Self-harm; misogyny] Maggie Fox at NBC News: More Girls Are Attempting Suicide; It's Not Clear Why. "A new study out Wednesday finds that more kids are either thinking about or attempting suicide. 'When we looked at hospitalizations for suicidal ideation and suicidal encounters over the last decade, essentially 2008 to 2015, we found that the rates doubled among children that were hospitalized for suicidal thoughts or activity,' Dr. Gregory Plemmons of Vanderbilt University told NBC News. ...Girls made up nearly two-thirds of the cases. ...'I don't have any one magic answer that explains why we're seeing this,' Plemmons said. ...But there was a hint in Plemmons' data. The rate of hospital visits was much higher during the school year. ]On average, during the eight years included in the study, only 18.5 percent of total annual suicide ideation and suicide attempt encounters occurred during summer months,' the team wrote." Goddammit.


Mike Elk at the Guardian: North Carolina Teachers Join Wave of Strikes with One-Day Walkout. "Thousands of teachers and their supporters are set to rally at the state capitol on what will also be the first day of the session for the North Carolina general assembly. The walkout aims to highlight low wages and poorly funded public schools. Since 2009, real wages for teachers have fallen by 9.4% in North Carolina. Following a successful teachers' strike in West Virginia in March, union organisers in North Carolina began discussing what they could do. Then they watched teachers in several other states go on strike too. 'We saw Kentucky, Oklahoma, and Arizona, of course, and that momentum that has been building in these 'right-to-work states' is inspiring,' said Kristin Beller, a teachers' union leader in Wake County, North Carolina." Go get 'em, teachers!

What have you been reading that we need to resist today?

Open Wide...
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"I don't have enough for a lawsuit, but I do have enough for a broken heart/spirit."

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Monday, May 14, 2018
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[Content Note: Rape culture; misogyny; objectification; body policing; fat hatred; diet talk.]

This essay by Ally Sheedy, "Stasis," from the new book Not That Bad: Dispatches From Rape Culture, a collection of essays edited by Roxane Gay, is a must-read. Following is just a brief excerpt:

It did not matter that I did a good job on auditions, that I was smart, that I had natural ability. My thighs were the "thing."

So I dieted. All. The. Time. I learned that whatever I might contribute to a role through talent would be instantly marginalized by my physical appearance. I learned that my success would be dependent on what the men in charge thought about my face and my body. Everything I had learned back home had to go out the window as I adapted to these new requirements: what I looked like was paramount.

It wasn't even just whether I was pretty or thin; it was that I wasn't sexy. When I managed to land my first part in a big movie, I was given a ThighMaster as a welcome present and told to squeeze it between my legs at least a hundred times a day. A director of photography told me he couldn't shoot me "looking like that" when I walked on set one day. He said it in front of the whole crew. I was too wide, I guess, in the skirt they had given me to wear.

A few years later, I was told point-blank that my career was moving slowly because "nobody wants to fuck you."

...I'm still navigating the sexual appearance standard in professional work. When I am called to consider a role or audition for a role in TV/Hollywood Land, my talent is never in question. The "studio" or the "network" wants me on tape to see what I look like now.

I was never alone in a hotel room with Harvey Weinstein, but I've been at "dinners" that felt like come-ons and I've walked into rooms where I've been sized up and then received phone calls or "date" requests that I've turned down.

Today, if the producer or executive or male director in charge finds me sexually attractive, then I'm on the list. This is how it goes. This is how it IS. If the Harvey Weinstein disaster illustrates anything at all, it illustrates the entirety of the power structure. The lurid details of his rapes are disgusting and yet a shield, in a way, for the greater toxicity of that power structure.
There is so, so much more at the link, and I highly recommend heading over to read the whole thing.


What did I care how sexy Ally Sheedy was when I was watching her be cool and tough and weird and sweet? It didn't escape my notice that she was frequently cast as the girlfriend of the person who got to be the star, and it didn't escape my understanding, even as a child, that that was not a choice she could control. Virtually all the girls I liked were the girlfriend.

But if the Men Who Make Movies were casting her for her thighs, Sheedy imbued her characters with a complex humanity that captivated me. Not that it matters. Girls being captivated by other girls and women onscreen has never been the reason that men make movies.

Which is the cost of objectification to us all — the girls and women who act in movies, and the girls and women who watch them.

We all deserve better.

We all deserve to live in a world in which girls and women are genuine equals of men, in screen-time and complexity and pay and respect; where they are given characters of consequence to play; where they are cast in those roles for their talents alone; where they have equal opportunity to create and write and direct characters of consequence; where we are given abundant chances to watch them; where we all get to see ourselves represented onscreen, in characters who are more than objects or plot devices or sidekicks or tokens.

We all deserve to live in a world where girls and women feel safe participating in any industry that utilizes our labor.

Open Wide...
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Happy International Women's Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, March 08, 2018
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Today is International Women's Day, which is generally only meaningfully marked by the people who already treat every day as International Women's Day. It is a day on which I am usually pointedly reminded that the business of advocating on behalf of women's equality is still considered woman's work, which tends to give the day a flavor of bitter irony that doesn't want to leave my mouth.

Nonetheless, every year, I feel obliged to try to write something profound for International Women's Day, and every year I fail, and most years I feel more optimistic about the state of women's equality than I do on this day.

I'm angry about the state of the world for the women in it, for women in my own country and for women in every country all over the world, Black women, brown women, white women, tall women, short women, women with dwarfism, fat women, thin women, in-betweenie women, trans women, intersex women, disabled women, able-bodied women, neuro-typical women, neuro-atypical women, old women, young women, girls, women with children, childfree women, healthy women, ill women, poor women, rich women, middle class women, employed women, unemployed women, women who do unpaid labor, insured women, uninsured women, immigrant women, migrant women, refugee women, English-speaking women, non-English-speaking women, progressive women, conservative women, women in unions, women in uniforms, women in male-centric careers, women in comas, straight women, lesbian women, bisexual women, asexual women, demisexual women, partnered women, unpartnered women, polyam women, aromantic women, powerful women, weak women, vegan woman, vegetarian women, omnivorous women, religious women, atheist women, agnostic women, educated women, uneducated women, women who have survived trauma, women who want my advocacy, women who don't, and/or every other conceivable expression, intersection, and experience of womanhood that exists on the planet.

I am angry at what we are denied on the basis of our womanhood, or the insufficiency of our womanhood, or the unacceptable expression of our womanhood, as arbitrarily defined by people fiercely guarding their privilege.

I am angry that we are denied autonomy, dignity, respect, the right of consent, safety, security, opportunity, access, equality—and many things smaller than those.

That anger threatens every day to engulf me, to hold me like a flame under a jar until, starved of oxygen, I disappear into a wisp of smoke. I search each morning for a way to turn that anger into inspiration, fuel, purpose. Today is a day like all others in that regard.

Today is a day when I am angry, but, also like all other days, it is a day on which I am happy to be a woman among women.

I do not long to be the Exceptional Woman. When I find myself in a space in which I am the only woman, I do not feel satisfied, nor do I feel insecure: I feel contemptuous that there aren't more women there. I do not want to compete with other women in a way that suggests there is only room for one of us. I want to lift up other women, and be lifted up by them, and blaze trails in the hopes that many more will follow behind.

I respect women, and I love them. And when I take stock of all the issues disproportionately affecting women across the globe, what I see is lack of respect and love for women so pervasive and profound that to merely assert to love and respect women yet remains a radical act.

It is at the intersection of my anger at the mistreatment of women and my love and respect for them that I find my motivation every day.


This year's International Women's Day campaign theme is #PressforProgress: "We can't be complacent. Now, more than ever, there's a strong call-to-action to press forward and progress gender parity. A strong call to #PressforProgress. A strong call to motivate and unite friends, colleagues, and whole communities to think, act, and be gender inclusive. International Women's Day is not country, group, or organisation specific. The day belongs to all groups collectively everywhere. So together, let's all be tenacious in accelerating gender parity. Collectively, let's all Press for Progress."

Okay! I'm in!

I am committed to Pressing for Progress on this day, and every day. The truth is, if there were a way to succinctly describe what I've been doing here for the last nearly 14 years, "pressing for progress" wouldn't be a bad attempt.

All I ever do is try to empty the sea with this teaspoon; all I can do is keep trying to empty the sea with this teaspoon.

Like I say every year: I am an imperfect advocate for women, and I have nothing profound to say on International Women's Day. Again. The truth is, I just want to recommit myself to treating every day as a day in which it is important to fight for international justice for women, and to value and respect them, including myself.

I am a feminist with a teaspoon, and I ain't afraid to use it.

Open Wide...
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TV Corner: Everything Sucks! (and I Don't Care About McQuaid)

Posted by Fannie Wolfe at Tuesday, March 06, 2018
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In the final scene of Pitch Perfect, do you want to know how many times the camera cuts away from the nine women performing on stage to Beca's (Anna Kendrick) on-again, off-boyfriend, Jesse (Skylar Astin), who is watching in the audience?

Seven.

Seven times.

In what is supposed to be a moment of triumph for the Bellas as they perform their winning routine, in a span of less than four minutes, somebody made the decision to give us seven shots of Jesse's silent, emotional progression from disinterested pouting, to slow realization that a song was a reference to himself, and finally to a victorious, happy raised fist.

Jesse watching. Always watching.
I watch Pitch Perfect at least once per year and, during this scene, my wife somehow tolerates me yelling at the television, "I don't care, I don't care, I DON'T CARE about Jesse's boner!"

It's not just that I think the Beca/Jesse relationship is superfluous (which it is), it's that Jesse himself is superfluous to the major theme running through the Pitch Perfect series. Via competition in a capella, the women in the Bellas come to understand the power of using their authentic voices. This theme of women-finding-themselves is subverted when the camera continually cuts away from the women, just as they've found their voices, and onto a man's reactions. It is unnecessary coddling of the male viewer who will only watch women's stories if the stories are somehow really about a male character's inner landscape.

With this intro, we come to one of the final scenes of Netflix original, 1990's nostalgia/coming-of-age series, Everything Sucks!

(The rest of this post contains spoilers for this series)

Now, I should preface this critique by saying the following. First, I thought the performance of Kate (Peyton Kennedy) as a nerdy lesbian teenager in 1996 was pretty great, as was the decision to make her one of the two main protagonists. Secondly, I also understand that the portrayal of Luke (Jahi Di'Allo Winston), a biracial boy, as the other protagonist might be meaningful to a lot of people (even if the show takes a subtle "I don't even see race" perspective where Luke and his mom's Blackness is never mentioned by anyone in this apparently predominately-white Oregon town).

Lastly, I tend to like nostalgia series, even as I notice (what I view as) their imperfections. As I watched Everything Sucks!, for instance, I had to chuckle at the clothes. Why did we wear such big jeans, flannels, and sweaters in the 1990s? How did we function with dial-up Internet that bumped you offline anytime someone called your landline? How many other queer girls had coming-of-age moments in the queer-adjacent spaces of Tori Amos, Ani DiFranco, and Indigo Girls concerts?

Season One has led Kate and Emaline (Sydney Sweeney) to an important moment in the finale. Over the course of the season, Kate has realized she's a lesbian and has developed a crush on Emaline. Because we are less privy to Emaline's interior, we aren't 100% sure what she's feeling but she seems to go from disliking to being intrigued by to developing a crush on Kate.

These events culminate with Emaline leading Kate back to the empty auditorium, where they begin slow-dancing together, on stage. As a queer viewer who came of age in the 1990s, I couldn't stop thinking of the many things that could go wrong here. Somebody could walk in! It could be a trap! Oliver could come back at any time! Was he back already, in fact, hiding in the wings?!

Yet, magically, everything actually seemed okay. It could all turn to shit later, sure, but in that scene, Emaline pressed play on the boom box and started to dance just dorkily enough to suggest that she (kind of awkwardly) actually reciprocated Kate's crush on her. As they danced together, it was sweet. It was also a moment that very few queer kids likely got to experience in the 1990s.

But then, enter male nerd, McQuaid (Rio Mangini), who has an unrequited crush on Emaline.

Immediately after Kate and Emaline share their first kiss, the camera perspective widens and we see McQuaid storm into the auditorium. The camera then focuses on him watching the girls, while his face is fixed in agony over being confronted with the reality that Emaline is kissing someone else. After several seconds, he goes into the hallway, and we go with him, and he slumps back against a locker as if in visceral pain.

So, in what should be a triumphant moment for Kate, Emaline, and their respective self-discoveries, we are instead left watching a tangential heterosexual male nerd experience angst about what he has just watched the female characters do. We are implicitly invited to empathize with McQuaid.

It is a profoundly befuddling choice, although not surprising. It's said that "women watch themselves being looked at," but it's more than that. Time and time again, we watch male characters slowly, painfully realize that women and girls are beings with our own agency and desires. And, we watch men get very upset about this.

Ironically, we are given almost no backstory or insight into McQuaid. He's a flat stereotype but we're just supposed to feel for him, because um?

We do know that he's part of a slightly-misogynistic male nerd trio of Luke, Tyler (Quinn Liebling), and himself. For instance, the trio initially talk as though girls are not human beings with agency, but a series of achievements to unlock in a video game. McQuaid has somehow calculated all of their odds of leaving high school as virgins (how? with what statistics?) and the progression seems to be: get a girlfriend, have a first kiss, have sex. Which girls these activities might occur with seems much less important, at least initially, than the fact that these activities occur.

Earlier in the season, Luke quickly develops a crush on Kate and it gets complicated fast. Kate tells him she thinks she's a lesbian and they stay in a fake relationship anyway, for the sake of appearances, because what could go wrong. Yet, to Luke's credit, in addition to earning some lesbian bona fides by going to a Tori Amos concert with his lesbian "girlfriend" in 1996, he gradually comes to appreciate that Kate has an interior of her own and that her lesbianism doesn't have anything to do with him. (He then directs a movie in which lesbians are aliens from outer space and this is supposed to be a big character development moment for him, but I have questions).

Yet, we see no development for McQuaid. In fact, what little we do know about him aside from being in the nerd trio, is that for the two episodes leading up to the season finale, he starts lusting after Emaline.

It's not that McQuaid's lust for Emmaline is bad, per se. It's more that we've been given so little reason to care about his lust. Also, as infatuated as TV/filmmakers are with the "socially-awkward male nerd who lusts after a girl" character type, new spins or reboots on this type are rarely done, let alone done well.

The nerd genre has long had a tidy "every male nerd deserves a girl in the end" entitlement, Stranger Things included, and it's difficult not to see that here. When this entitlement is shown in the context of two queer girls kissing, the suggestion seems to be that this guy's hetero angst, a representation that's a dime a dozen in the nerd genre, was more profound than the angst of being a queer girl in 1996 when kids were trying to find out what the hell we were by sneaking peaks at clinical textbooks in the school library.

The big take-away from the bizarre pivot to McQuaid, because we know so little about him other than his lust for Emaline, is that the mere existence of male lust is thought as of "enough" to make us give a shit about a male character over the main female character. To de-center queer girls in a coming of age show in favor of re-centering male heterosexuality, quite frankly sucks. Female and queer characters deserve better.

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YES!!!

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, January 25, 2018
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I am very excited to see Ava DuVernay's A Wrinkle in Time, which I have been waiting to see brought to the big screen since I loved the book as a girl, and this has only increased my excitement, and I didn't even think that was possible!


In case you can't view the image embedded in the tweet, from left to right are pictured a Barbie doll of Mindy Kaling's character from the film (Kaling is Indian American); of Oprah Winfrey's character (Winfrey is Black); and of Reese Witherspoon's character (Witherspoon is white).

Regardless of one's feelings about Barbie, and there are valid criticisms of the franchise, seeing Mrs. Who, Mrs. Which, and Mrs. Whatsit as Barbies, for grown-up girls (and boys) who once loved Barbies and A Wrinkle in Time, is pretty damn terrific.

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Quote of the Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Wednesday, December 06, 2017
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"We have to make it not only safe for women, we have to make it possible for us to express a full range of human emotion...without being so negatively judged. Remember when [Trump] called me a nasty woman? All of that stuff didn't end up hurting him that much because men are given a much broader range of emotions to demonstrate their authentic feelings. Be part of the changing culture so it's not viewed as disqualifying if you're standing up for yourself and speaking up for yourself."—Hillary Clinton, at the Teen Vogue Summit in Los Angeles on Dec. 2, during a Q&A with Black-ish star Yara Shahidi.

There are still people who say that having a female president doesn't matter. But when was the last time you heard any male presidential candidate tell girls that they should feel empowered to fight for their complex humanity?

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Here Is Something Nice

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, September 28, 2017
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If you can't view the photo embedded in the tweet, it shows Hillary Clinton at a book signing, signing copies of the It Takes a Village picture book. She is looking up and smiling at a little girl who has come to meet her, wearing a tiny white (!!!) pantsuit and chunky necklace (not dissimilar from the one Clinton is wearing herself), and she is holding her hand to her mouth like she CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE she is face-to-face with Hillary Clinton.

[H/T to Eastsidekate.]

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Here Is Something Nice

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, July 13, 2017
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My dear friend Jessica Luther wrote this amazing article, "A Team of Their Own," about Girls Travel Baseball (GTB), and it is heartbreaking in many ways, because misogyny exists in the world, but it also just a lovely story about girls doing something they love — even if it necessitates navigating misogyny.

There are so many beautiful moments of female connection in the piece, and so many moments of female ferocity. I strongly encourage you to read the whole thing, but here is a short excerpt:

Aubrey Evans is sitting in the lobby of GTB's hotel on the morning of the first day of the tournament. Her socks are pulled up to her knees, she's wearing a Dirtbags baseball T-shirt, and on the brim of her GTB baseball hat sits a pair of sunglasses. Behind her, some teammates are playing catch.

She knows she's there to be quizzed about baseball. She sounds like she's answered all these questions before; she probably has. Nearly every member of GTB has had a profile published in their local paper and a few have done radio spots or TV hits. Reporters pop up every so often to ask them about being one of a few girls who play the nation's pastime. Maybe that is why Evans is gruff but patient, not quite bored but not far from it.

Her mood changes, though, when she talks about what it's like to be on an all-girls team that plays teams full of boys. A sly smile crawls across her face, a corner of her mouth kicking up, as she says: "Everyone looks at us weird, and they're like, 'Oh, a bunch of girls. We can beat them.' Then once they see us actually beating them, they start to get scared." She loves that feeling, when the boys realize their level of competition. "Feels great," she says. "Because they're all crying when we strike them out or tag them out. [They] throw their helmets and everything."

"They're so emotional," Grace DeVinney adds. The girls laugh.
Perfection.

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To All the Little Girls

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, March 16, 2017
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In Hillary Clinton's concession speech, she said: "To all the little girls watching right now, never doubt that you are valuable and powerful and deserving of every chance and opportunity in the world."

A music theory teacher, instructing a class of young girls at the SOL LA Music Academy, gave her students that section of Hillary's speech, with the assignment to write a song.

Below, with a big hat tip to my friend Leah McElrath, is the result.


Video Description: As piano music begins to play, text appears onscreen: "In a music theory class of young girls, the teacher handed out a section of Hillary Clinton's concession speech. The assignment was to write a song. This is what happened..."

A young girl, with light skin and brown hair, sits at a piano, surrounded by her classmates—a diverse group of young girls. The girl at the piano is the pianist and lead singer of the piece. The other girls play additional instruments and/or participate as back-up singers.

The lead singer sings: "Never doubt that you are valuable / And powerful / And deserving / Of every chance and opportunity / In the world / To pursue / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this..."

As she sings, the players of string instruments come in.

"Never change about who you are / Invincible / And confident / Leading to a deeper plan / Possibilities / Coming true / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this..."

Strings. Beautiful strings. The strings fade, and the piano solos. Cut to images of the girls from the group holding hand-made signs. One reads: "I want to be the change." Another reads: "I want everyone to have an education!" Another: "I want to create the future!" Another: "I want to help animals." Another: "I want to make a difference!" Another: "Dreams can become reality..." Another: "All girls matter." Photos of the girls standing in groups, holding their signs, tossing them into the air, grinning.

"Never doubt that you are valuable / And powerful / And deserving / Of every chance and opportunity / In the world / To pursue."

The girls throw their arms around each other's shoulders, swaying as they sing together.

"And to all the little girls / Who are watching this / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this / And to all the little girls / Who are watching this..."

The song ends on the piano. Credits.

* * *

As y'all know, I'm inclined to cry at everything, anyway, but this one left me in a heap of heaving sobs. Not just because of the song itself, which would have been enough all on its own, but because I saw it today, a day on which the person who won the presidency has proposed eliminating arts programs and slashing the education budget.

Our president could have been instead the woman who inspired this song. It should have been.

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Quote of the Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Thursday, November 03, 2016
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"In my experience, whenever you take a stand for what you believe, there will always be people who disagree with you. That's especially true, I think, for women. So please know that you're in good company. Believe me, every strong woman you admire who has worked to make our world a fairer place has faced opposition along the way."—Hillary Clinton, responding to a question from a teenage girl who is "being harassed by male classmates for being a feminist," during a terrific interview with Rookie magazine.

I highly recommend reading the whole thing. It's so good.

And I defy anyone to read this interview and tell me that electing a woman president doesn't matter.

[H/T to Alison Rose.]

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Photo of the Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Wednesday, November 02, 2016
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image of a Black girl sitting on the floor in what looks like a school hallway; behind her on the wall is a sign in red and blue lettering on a white background reading: 'Do the Most Good'
[Photo: Michael Davidson, Hillary for America | Oct 21, Jacksonville, NC]

Oh my heart.

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Photo of the Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Tuesday, October 11, 2016
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black and white image of a little girl who appears to be white at a Clinton rally, wearing a t-shirt that reads: 'Girls Just Want to Have [equal sign symbolizing the word equality]'
[Photo: Erin Schaff for Hillary for America.]

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In the News

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Friday, October 07, 2016
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Here is some stuff in the news today...

Whooooooops! "Trump has declared that he has a 'winning temperament.' He argued in the first debate that 'my strongest asset, maybe by far, is my temperament.' Surveys, though, suggest it is one of his biggest political weaknesses. A Fox News poll taken after the first debate, for instance, found that just 37 percent of likely voters believe Trump has the right temperament to be president, compared to 67 percent for Clinton."

Further to that point, this is a great piece by Joy Reid: "If Donald Trump Wins, the GOP Will Rein Him In, Right? Uh, Yeah."

[Content Note: Disablism; antisemitism; racism; threats; harassment] "How Donald Trump Supporters Attack Journalists." Yep. As I've said previously, "basket of deplorables" was generous.

From my colleague Matthew at Shareblue: "Reminder: GOP continues to obstruct Supreme Court nominee Merrick Garland."

[CN: Misogyny] "Girls spend 40% more time performing unpaid household chores than boys, according to a new report from the UN children's agency. Unicef said the difference in time spent working amounted to 160 million extra hours a day worldwide. Two out of three girls cook and clean in the home, and almost half collect water or firewood. They also perform more 'less visible' domestic work like childcare or looking after the elderly, the report says. It also found that the extra workload increased with time: between ages five and nine, girls spend 30% more time on chores—by 14, it rises to 50%."

Whoa, this looks so good: "Jordan Peele's Horror Film, Get Out, Gets An Amazing Trailer."

If you like Sarah Paulson (I do!), you might like this interview with her (I did!). "In terms of my [Emmy acceptance] speech, I wanted to say I love you to the person I love. Everyone else does it, so should I not do it because the person I love is a woman? And so I thought, you know what? I'm just gonna do it. I wasn't worried over it. It was a flashing thought—'should I do it?'. And I thought to myself, 'The fact that I am having this thought is wrong in the first place.' The idea that I would have to take a moment before I say this to consider what impact it might have that could be negative, is an asinine thing to engage with mentally, and I refuse to do it. So I just said what I wanted to say."

What have you been reading?

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"It's Good to Be Ambitious."

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Friday, October 07, 2016
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I've got a new piece at Shareblue about Hillary Clinton's interview with 11-year-old Marley Dias, the creator of #1000BlackGirlBooks.

"It's good to be ambitious." Those are five deceptively powerful words. They are words that girls and women rarely hear, and to hear them from a woman who is on the precipice of breaking into the biggest, baddest boys' club on the planet is quite special.

...She knows the creeping self-doubt that springs forth from seeds of discouragement, planted by sinister opposition. And thus she knows how important it is not just to help blaze the trail, but to call to those behind her: It is good to come this way.
As always, there's more at the link!

This election is terrible. And also? IT IS AMAZING. I feel like every day there is a precious gift to appreciate, a gem buried in all the ash spewing forth from Mount Trump.

I have waited a very long time for this election, and it isn't going exactly how I'd hoped, to put it mildly, but I'll be goddamned if I'm gonna let Trump overwhelm my capacity to enjoy the good stuff. The great stuff. THE BEST STUFF.

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Photo of the Day

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Monday, October 03, 2016
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image of Hillary Clinton at a campaign event at a church, talking to a little Black girl in a white dress, who is looking up at her with a joyful expression
[Photo: Barbara Kinney for Hillary for America | Oct 2 Charlotte, NC]

I don't even know where to begin. LOVE. The way Hillary is looking at this little girl to make sure she knows that what she's saying is very important and worthy and welcome to the person who may be the nation's first woman president.

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The Best

Posted by Melissa McEwan at Monday, September 19, 2016
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