[Content note: Guns, gun violence, homophobia, misogyny]
It Is Thursday:
Actual Headline: "Squeezing breasts could prevent cancer, best study ever says."
Gay rights pioneer Richard Adams died Monday morning.
Guess what? Bill O'Reilly covers the War On Christmas more than actual wars. (See also.)
American gun deaths to exceed traffic fatalities by 2015. America! What a country!
The Irish government announced that it will draft new legislation to clarify the country's restrictive abortion ban.
Judd Apatow's new movie contains jokes about murdering children. Edgy!
The Vatican says gay marriage is a false utopia. The Vatican knows a lot about false utopias.
The CDC reports a 22 percent increase in HIV among young gay men.
Guns out of stock at Wal-Mart as magazine prices surge. America! What a country!
If you have 89 cents, check out Big Al's doomsday prepper song.
New counterterrorism database rules threaten the privacy of every American.
Sheldon Adelson spent as much as $150 million trying to buy the 2012 election. America! What a country!
Newt Gingrich thinks he would have done better than Mitt Romney if he'd been nominated. (But everyone still hates you, Newt!)
Where's your figgy pudding? Right here.