"You're trying to paint the governor as a racist. And nothing could be further from the truth."—Dan Turner, spokesperson for Gov. Haley Barbour (R-Acist), who recently waxed nostalgic for the Citizens' Councils which were "the respectable face of white supremacist political activism" preceding and during the Civil Rights Era, which Barbour recalls as a time that wasn't "that bad."
So nothing is further from the truth than "Haley Barbour is a racist"? Cool! Let's think of some things that are closer to being true than "Haley Barbour is a racist." I'll start...
Haley Barbour is an alien from Planet Yeahright.
Haley Barbour is totes into eating poop sandwiches every afternoon at 3pm.
Haley Barbour's favorite show ever is Saved by the Bell. He hearts Screech.
Haley Barbour is half komodo dragon.
Haley Barbour's head is filled with garbage farts.