*Smacks Forehead*

Steve and Tbogg both point to a post by William A. Jacobson, a fucking Associate Clinical Professor of Law at Cornell Law School, who...

*rubs eyes, sighs deeply*

Okay, seriously... if this kind of shit is going to go on for the next four years, I don't know how I'm going to take it without snapping and going on a five state killing spree.

So apparently, as Petulant pointed out, the NOOZ had to report on The Most Important Story of the Day: Obama and Biden sitting down for a couple of burgers. But that isn't the REALLY IMPORTANT PART of The Most Important Story of the Day, nononono. The BIG part of the story is that...

You're never gonna believe it...

I can hardly believe it myself...


Get ready for it...


Haw haw haw! What a fucking pansy, amirite?

*bangs head against wall several times*

Seriously. Steve and Tbogg link to the original post, where the guy has no less than six fucking updates and four videos of "proof" about a dollop of goddamn mustard, along with:
Obama ordered his burger with DIJON MUSTARD! Bet he had to seek John Kerry's counsel on that.
Christ, "John Kerry is an elitist" jokes? Did I stumble into the Wayback machine?

I mean... look, the guy made a fucking graphic:

And he's actually calling this "Dijongate." Dijongate! I'd say he's doing this tongue-in-cheek, but... come on, six updates? Obsessing about a "cover-up?"

Here, by the way, is the big "cover-up."
NBC's regular news reported Obama's order as follows: ""I'm going to have a basic cheddar cheese burger, medium well, with mustard," Obama said. "Do you have spicy mustard? I'll take that."

Actually, the quote was "you got a spicy mustard or something like that, or a Dijon mustard, something like that" (at 0.55 of the unedited video below without Mitchell's talkover).
Holy fuck, what a scandal! I don't know if there's an award out there for "Fucking Stupidest Blog Post on the Face of the Earth,*" but I think this would have to be in the top five.

I give the fuck up.

*(Thanks, Tommy Franks.)

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