Read These Now: Observations By Petulant

Today was a blah, but insane day of being awake since 4 am. When I run on three hours sleep, I AM NOT A HAPPY CAMPER. The medicine cabinet was empty of any sort of sedation so I called my doc as soon as his office opened. I must have a stash for nights like last night! OTC doesn't work.

So here are some quick newsy links before I get to my observations. Madoff plead guilty and is in jail. Meghan McCain wants Robert Duvall and Sharon Stone to be her real parents. I really feel for South Carolina and having to deal with Mark Sanford. Japan is using math to create sexier lingerie. I might enjoy one of these creationist vacations if I went solo. I also love a spacesuit.

Now my observations culled from the endless emails I sent Liss throughout the day:

I need to cut my nails as I scratched my balls too hard.

THE PAIN!

Martha Stewart chatted about Twitter and called them "twits." I have no idea if that is correct as I am not fluent in Twitterspeak.

Kyle Maclachlan is on The View and I would still do him. Now, I need to pull all Kyle DVDS where he shows his ass. Blue Velvet and Showgirls here I come.

The guy who played the gay guy on Melrose Place, Doug something (Savant, I looked it up.), is also on The View and I want his shoes.

Whenever it rains the lower channels on my cable system become fuzzy. You would think for $138 a month I could get decent reception.

I would have a screen capture of Doug Savant's shoes but my cable system sucks.

As someone who often feels like a marionette, I take offense to Liss' description of Michael Steele. I must now call my Marionettes Anonymous sponsor for guidance.

Alexander McQueen created perfect clothes for me in the fall.

A perfect driving ensemble, as a passenger of course.

Something for a rainy day.

And a trip to Siberia.


Alexander McQueen Fall Ready to Wear 2009

Never buy a black stove! The glass-topped ones are impossible to clean and I kill my arm EVERY DAY.

Obama gives a nonillion speeches a day. Oversaturation can lead to public ridicule. Earlier, his security speech ended with not just "God Bless America", but "God Bless You" too. Gee... I feel safer now.

I love the word of the day: mathematicaster. So fitting these days.

Hardballz is on as I compile this crap. BILL COSBY makes no sense whatsoever. Really. I have no idea what he is babbling. I want his drugs, but not his laugh.

Speaking of drugs, I might finally be ready for my Kyle Maclachlan Ass-A-Thon.

First, I must partake of every junk food in the freezer: jalapeno poppers, pot stickers, cheese-stuffed bread, mini corn dogs with my favorite German mustard, and bbq lit'l smokies. I also made a hoisin dipping sauce with Sambal Oelek for the pot stickers.



Remember kittens, anything served on a bed of lettuce is nutritious. HA!

(Cross-posted at Petulant Rumblings)