Rounding out the trifecta of Things We're Talking About Tonight is the always-fun Vagina Voting. Will Palin appeal to disaffected Hillary Clinton voters? As if on cue, the preposterousness of this possibility is underlined by former Hewlett Packard CEO Carly Fiorina materializing onstage. She knows John McCain. I know this because she says "I know John McCain" about eight thousand times in her boring-ass speech. I'd like to hear less about how she knows John McCain and more about how women are supposed to become CEOs of Fortune 500 corporations if they don't have control over their reproduction.Read the whole thing here.
Meanwhile, on the convention floor, the Republicans are dancing to the Footloose theme. I was just thinking that what this convention needed was more Kenny Loggins!
…When I awaken, Rudy Giuliani is taking the stage, and instantly dashes my hopes for a "Rudy Giuliani Revue!" by not wearing his fishnets and failing to enter flanked by two erstwhile Rockettes to be introduced as the "9/11 Dancers." There's no such thing as showmanship anymore. Instead, it's just a bunch of snore-inducing codswallop about lefty media and Hollywood liberals and other Americans who should be sent to Gitmo, followed by a careening stagger from random subject to random subject, eliciting cheers and boos and chants of USA! in the vaguely appropriate spots. Hey, here's a hot bit of news for us, care of Giuly: McCain was a POW. Really? Tell me more. (I know you will!) He is, as always, a brutally bad speaker – they couldn't have done better finding someone who will inevitably make Palin look good. After this, she could come out and play a funeral dirge on a broken kazoo and look like a dynamo.
And while you're over there, check out Richard Adams' "Welcome to the Palindome," which is a great piece about how "the Republicans have assembled a formidable team aimed at winning the election – the election of 2000."