Statement from William K. Wolfrum: "I am not gay, and have mostly never been gay"

Statement of William K. Wolfrum

William K. Wolfrum made this statement to all his supporters at 3:30 p.m.:

"First of all, I'd like to thank so many of you for standing by me in this terrible time. However, I'd also like to point out that those of you standing behind me just aren't helping matters. So if you could just move forward and to the side, that would be fantastic.

I wanted to release this statement to point out that I am not gay. Let me be perfectly clear on that. I am not gay, and I love my wife.

Also, I have never been gay. At least not for any extended period of time. I was briefly gay in 1978, but those were the days of disco, and everyone was gay at one point or another.

Also, in 1983 I was briefly gay, but that coincided with the release of Rocky III.

In 1989, I gave oral sex to a guy. Several hundred times. And when I say "guy" I suppose I mean "hundreds of male interns." So yeah, I'll have to say I was gay then, as well. That one's pretty hard to argue.

Also, the majority of the 90s, I lived with a guy named Ray. He was really just the sweetest guy, and we liked the same movies, notably Rocky III and Saturday Night Fever. We had a cat named Buster, and really, it was the most healthy relationship I've ever had. So while I'm hazy on definitions, I can see that some people might say that I was gay during that time frame.

Over the past few years, however, I have been repeatedly harassed about my sexuality, and felt the need to release this statement. The media likes to focus solely on my gay-related activities. As you can see, however, the great majority of my time has been spent not being gay. If you add sleeping, meals and bathing into the mix, even in my gayest moments, I was not gay for more than 70 percent of those times.

This is a witch hunt, my friends. A witch hunt by numerous magazines, newspapers and Web sites. A witch hunt that includes pictures, diagrams, videos and a bunch of sketches. So it's a pretty well put together witch hunt, but a witch hunt nonetheless.

Thank you for your support, God Bless America and say no to gay marriage, because it will be the ruin of this nation as we know it. I intend to continue blogging, and will represent all my many supporters as well as I humanly can under these unique conditions.

I have now retained counsel to examine this matter and I will make no further comment."


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