A Letter from George Bush, Compassionate Conservative

Dear Suiciders,

Just because I’m defunding 1-800-SUICIDE and trying to fold this highly effective service into my highly ineffective administration doesn’t mean you can’t still get help. In fact, in exchange for a little personal information, we’ll try to talk you down off that ledge. Heh heh.

Sincerely,


George W. Bush,
President of the United States of America
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