Steve Owen, 42, published a photo of 50-year-old Caroline Allen under "Collectables And Weird Stuff" on the internet auction site - describing her as "used". He has invited bids starting at just £1 reports The Sun.LOL. I like this story because it sounds like, even though they clearly antagonize one another, they have a bit of a sense of humor about it.
He posted the ad on the site after Caroline quit her home of 27 years in America and bought a house round the corner from him and common-law wife Tracey, 35, in Alvaston, Derby.
Steve said: "I'm deadly serious. She comes to the house every day trying to change me and make me tidy. I just hope someone will take her off my hands. She's single and not bad looking."
Caroline hit back: "He's lazy and I won't stop nagging him until he changes - that's my job. But he could have made the starting bid £100. I look better in the flesh."
Mr. Shakes gets on well with my parents, and they love him to itty bitty pieces. I reckon if both of us were drowning, and they could only save one of us, you’d check in the next day to find this: Shakespeare’s
I also get on well with Mr. Shakes’ dad, a former sailor with a dirty sense of humor who won’t show me his tattoos because “they aren’t appropriate for a lassie.” Which, of course, just made me want to see them more, but no such luck.
Mr. Shakes’ mum (who’s divorced from his dad) is a whole other story, but suffice it to say, she’s none too fond of the American hussy who stole her only son and dragged him 4,000 miles away—and I suspect she’d prefer to move right past putting me on eBay and put me instead at the bottom of Loch Ness.